I need major help!

It's like all he!! has broken loose here. The last few weeks with my three year old have gone from fun and and sweet to completely shredding my last nerve. We have the same situation happen over and over and over again every day. He will FREAK out if the babies touch "his" toy (it doesn't matter that there are 200 legos, he has to have ALL of them) and whatever toy the babies have he decides he has to have as well. It is endless. I tell him, "you have three options: Either take the toy and go play by yourself in your room, play at the kitchen table so they can't reach it, or let the babies play with you." He would prefer to play with whatever it is in the middle of the floor and hit or push or yell at the babies if they get too close. We go through this scenario 25 times a day. He inevitably ends up in time out for pushing, hitting, or kicking a baby. We are on his 4th time out already this morning, and it's only 9:30! Time-outs seems to do nothing. I want to smack him! I am at a complete loss. Everything is a battle and I am out of patience. It doesn't help that my DH has been out of town for a week. Has anyone else BTDT? What did you do? What am I missing here? I don't know how to handle this h-e-l-p!

Reyna

 

I send RaeLynn to her room (they have no toys in there) if she gets like this. And she does regularly. She usually falls asleep. I dont know what else to do either. I try to play with her more when the babies are napping but it is hard because that is when I get on TS and do laundry. Ugh... being a mommy is hard work!

 

My kids get time outs but the toys get time outs too! If they aren't playing nice with something and can't work it out then the toy gets a time out on top of the refrigerator (if it fits). I always say "If you can't play nice then you don't get to play with it at all."

 

I dont really have it figured out, but we are going through the same thing. I just try and stay consistent with my 3 yo. She gets the same options you give and I also try and explain to the boys outloud so she can hear that she has "special" toys that are hers so she thinks that she is not the only one being yelled at. I am not sure if it falls on deaf ears, but I try. Hang in there...at least we dont have two 3 year olds YET

 

Ouch, I'm even MORE exhausted than i was just reading your post! Sorry that this is going on, i have no suggestions, since these are my only two (and as pp wrote, hilariously, at least i don't have TWO three year olds!!)

sounds like it is just standard toddler possessiveness. I think the notion of making sure that you repeat that some toys are his only (IF that is the case) might help. And - it sounds like you just need a little break. wonder if you can get someone in to play with him alone - maybe an older kid (pay a neighborhood "big boy" just a few dollars; a good way to earn money/be responsible and a way for him to have some one on one time w/no one competing? just a thought.

sending a big hug. and, i just breathed OUT because i realized i've been holding mine for about an hour - that might help, at least it will help you FEEL better for a fw minutes even if it doesn't address the issue!

 

I also don't have it figured out, but wanted to let you know we are experiencing the same thing. I also try and remain consistent and if the behavior they are doing is unacceptable then off to time-out they go. Sometimes they are back in timeout within minutes of being there! I totally get what you are going through. Hang in there! :hug99:

 

It must be your son my DD is always "talking" to on her phone - sounds like they are on kahoots to drive us bonkers!!! We get the same thing here. I do feel sorry for her - I feel like the babies gang up on her, or at least that she feels that way. It make me sad because they really just want to do what she is doing and she does not want to play with them at all. What I have done is block off a protected area for her to play in the family room, the room we spend the most time in. We have a sectional, so I use the PNP and a footstool to block off the middle of the sectional. She can play in there when she needs a "baby break" or sometimes she asks to be in the PNP. I'm not sure if catering to it this way is just making it worse - but it keeps the peace. She didn't ask for two little siblings. I think her feels/reactions are normal even though I don't like them. I don't want to punish her for them. Two one year olds have a way of taking over everything!! She still has to share and wait her turn a ton, I think the protected area has helped her in her dealing with them the rest of the time.

 

Thank you for the sympathy/empathy! I just hate having to be the police all the time! Luckily they must have all sensed that I was fresh out of patience today because Bennett played so nicely today and they all napped at the same time (always a HUGE boost for me!) I might just make it another day!

Reyna

 

QUOTE(mrsfussypants @ Apr 10 2008, 09:03 PM) [snapback]716038[/snapback]
Thank you for the sympathy/empathy! I just hate having to be the police all the time! Luckily they must have all sensed that I was fresh out of patience today because Bennett played so nicely today and they all napped at the same time (always a HUGE boost for me!) I might just make it another day!

Reyna

:yahoo: Nothing lifts Mommys spirits like similtaneous napping!!

 

I know I shouldn't tell you this, seeing as how you're just entering....but 3 is a BAD year, LOL. At least it was for us. Every day between June and December of 2007, I wanted to beat my head against the wall because of Nadia's behavior....

It got better almost immediately when she turned 4 this past January. So, there is hope.

Meantime, I found 1-2-3 Magic to be helpful. If you don't want to read the book, rent both parts of the video from the library -- they're really pretty good.