I need help!

*sigh* I don't know what is up. DD will NOT go to sleep. Most nights, she either will not go to sleep, or she goes right now, sleeps for about an hour, and then wakes up screaming and won't go back to sleep. Last night I was up until 2 am with her screaming, I tried everything, the swing, holding her in my lap on my chest, cradled, on her belly, I tried teething tablets, motrin, gas drops, toys, changing her diaper...nothing worked and she just screamed, even though she was so tired. Finally at 2 am, I swaddled her up and rocked her and she conked out...she has not been swaddled since 3 months or less!!

Tonight...she's done it again. Slept for an hour or so, and woke up, won't go back down. I gave her gas drops, cause she was tootin some..but I was rocking her upstairs and she just screamed the whole time. So I brought her down to the kitchen where hubby was loading the dishwasher and laid her on the counter in front of me, and she was totally fine the whole time, until I picked her up and went and sat in the livingroom where it's dark. Gave her off to hubby for a try and he took her upstairs, and she's been up there crying for a while now...it's quiet for the moment, but I know she's not asleep yet.

I don't understand, and I don't know what to do! I do not have the energy to stay up until 2 am again with her screaming her head off! I need help, any suggestions on what to do? Should I just let her CIO? When we do let her cry at all for a few mins, she doesn't stop and just gets worse, and when she gets worked up its always harder to calm her down...I'm not sure that's the best way to go for her...but I really don't know what else to do. She does really good in the day, for naps, no problems at all!

HELP!

 

oh my... i think we've finally turned the corner on our babes sttn the night again.

issues I figured out... I think we gave them too much daytime sleep. back at 6 mo. they were getting at least 2 2+ hr naps and then maybe a 3rd. And some of the earlier naps would go to 3 hrs... so then they stopped sleeping as much at night.

about that same time they it a growth spurt and wanted more milk... I went through my frozen breastmilk 40 bag stash in about 10 days... and finally got to support each day with pumping.

Now at 9-11 months it was similar... just the past 2 wks we've had great sleep for the most part.

Again, their naps seem to be part of the equation. now I get a good 2 hr nap in the morning and then if I keep the afternoon one to closer to 1 hour it helps them sleep at night.

Part 2 is that we diligently try to get them to bed around 7:30pm! This is early for us, but miraculously it works... they get fussy - and I'm trying to either shove just a little cereal in their mouths or breast feed just a few more minutes and I realize, they are just tired! anyway, when we keep to the 7:30p (ish) bedtime they tend to go right to sleep.

Part 3... if I think they didn't quite get enough food/milk... I'll go in and dreamfeed them before I go to sleep... 10p-11p and nurse them... then it seems they sleep all night.

sorry for the long post... this doesn't help you tonight.... but maybe tomorrow you could start documenting their naps and see if you need to cut back and then establish a bedtime if you don't have one.

(the book that helped me was Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Baby... (is that the name?))

For us, our dd sometimes does what you're describing... and she sometimes just needs to chill out for an hour and then my husband will take her back to the crib and she'll go to sleep... its like she's saying "my mind isn't tired yet... just let me be with you"... poor little things. but more... poor momma! its hard to not get your sleep. I hope you get some soon!

 

A few thoughts:

What time do you put her to bed? Maybe you need to move it up a bit. I found that the earlier I got them to bed, the better restful sleep they got.

Have you tired feeding her to see if she is hungry? That might soothe her sooner instead of staying up for hours.

How many naps is she taking during the day? Maybe she is taking too many or too few.

Some white noise in the nursery.

CIO is an option if that is something you want to do.

I am sorry that you are up alot at night. It is very hard especially if they have been STTN for a bit and your body is used to getting sleep. :hug:

 

I have all the same questions as Rachel. I was also wondering if you have a nightlight in the room. Maybe if she could see that her brother is asleep she'll be more comforted. We started CIO at 7 months b/c I didn't know what else to do. They were waking at 2am though and not wanting to stay awake, just wanting me to get them back to sleep.

 

She finally went to sleep at like 10:30-11pm...DH had her upstairs and she screamed for like an hour. I don't know if he was holding her or what, but I would assume he was rocking her in the chair. I had tried swaddling right off, this time, and that didn't work. At first she started looking drowsy, but then started screaming again.

I will answer some questions.

They usually go to bed from 7-8pm. Last night it was 7:30, but the night before was totally off, cause I had to pick up DH at the airport at 9:45 pm (an hour drive away), and I put them in the car about 8ish, and they slept all the way up, and all the way back, and went down, she slept for like an hour, and then did this, so she was up way later.

We have not tried feeding her, but I might do that if she does it tonight...I was thinking maybe I should try a bottle, as I lay in bed last night, after the fact. I guess maybe she could be going through a spurt (no signs yet, really), and she doesn't take in but 18-22oz a day.

They have been taking 3 naps a day, most times (if I'm not out and about, then they might skip a nap, but they do sleep in the car). She's never been a super long sleeper...she used to take 20 min naps, and just in the last month or so has started going for about an hour the first nap, and hour to an hour and a half the 2nd nap, and 45 mins to an hour on the 3rd, which is usually about at 3-3:30pm or so. Occasionally she'll sleep for longer on one of the first couple naps, or even the last one, but I wake them up if they slept for an hour and no signs of waking, for that one, so that they'll be tired enough to go to sleep later for the night.

We play a radio in the nursery during naps and night. We had had an oldies cd (like, mostly 50s type stuff), but DH took it on his trip, so I turned on the radio. She's fine with it in the day, but I might find another CD to put in there, something more consistant.

I have thought about the night light too, I just keep forgetting to get one! At night I have to stand next to her crib, mostly, instead of by the door at naps, so that she can see me for a bit, if I just walk right out, she'll cry...but if she can see me for a bit, before I walk out, she's usually okay.

Thank you for all the input. I am a member of another general pregnancy forum, and it used to be really great for getting advice and such, but it seems like anytime I try nowadays, I get one response saying to do something I already tried (and mentioned in my OP), or nothing at all! I appreciate your help.

 

QUOTE(DATJMom @ Mar 31 2009, 06:44 AM) [snapback]1251840[/snapback]
A few thoughts:

What time do you put her to bed? Maybe you need to move it up a bit. I found that the earlier I got them to bed, the better restful sleep they got.

Have you tired feeding her to see if she is hungry? That might soothe her sooner instead of staying up for hours.

How many naps is she taking during the day? Maybe she is taking too many or too few.

Some white noise in the nursery.

CIO is an option if that is something you want to do.

I am sorry that you are up alot at night. It is very hard especially if they have been STTN for a bit and your body is used to getting sleep. :hug:


I agree completely. I have pushed my LO's bedtime to around 6pm. This has worked wonders for us. We also use white noise and have a darkened nursery. The book Happy sleep habits healthy child has helped me a lot troubleshooting the twins sleeping and napping. I would highly recommend that. We have also used CIO..hard to hear, but it works for us.

 

I don't know what to do! She is screaming again! We put her down right about 7 pm tonight, she woke up around I'd say 8ish, not screaming at first, but crying, and escalated. I went up and tried comforting her....no go, so I brought her down and we gave her the rest of her bottle, which she still didn't finish, but she was happy down here unless we held her in a laying position, and we took her back up and laid her in her crib and let her scream for about 15 minutes or so, and now DH is up there rocking her and she's still screaming. I don't know what to do, neither does DH. we are at a total loss...I just gave her some motrin....I thought her teeth might be hurting and I felt a bump on her gums, but I"m not sure if its where a tooth is coming or if its just her gums. NOTHING WORKS!! I need help, and nothing works...swaddling doesn't work, toys don't work, rocking and holding doesn't work, swing doesn't work, gas drops, teething tabs and motrin doesn't work, CIO doesn't work....

:cry: :cry:

 

:hug: I am so sorry that you are struggling right now. How consistent were you with CIO? How many days did you try it?

 

QUOTE(MuchFaith22 @ Apr 3 2009, 10:44 AM) [snapback]1256958[/snapback]
I don't know what to do! She is screaming again! We put her down right about 7 pm tonight, she woke up around I'd say 8ish, not screaming at first, but crying, and escalated. I went up and tried comforting her....no go, so I brought her down and we gave her the rest of her bottle, which she still didn't finish, but she was happy down here unless we held her in a laying position, and we took her back up and laid her in her crib and let her scream for about 15 minutes or so, and now DH is up there rocking her and she's still screaming. I don't know what to do, neither does DH. we are at a total loss...I just gave her some motrin....I thought her teeth might be hurting and I felt a bump on her gums, but I"m not sure if its where a tooth is coming or if its just her gums. NOTHING WORKS!! I need help, and nothing works...swaddling doesn't work, toys don't work, rocking and holding doesn't work, swing doesn't work, gas drops, teething tabs and motrin doesn't work, CIO doesn't work....

:cry: :cry:


Sorry to hear that your girl's screaming and you're going thru all these... :hug: I totall know what you're going through because my son acted up starting 2 weeks ago. He'd go to sleep at about 8pm, and after 1-1.5 hr of sleep, he'll wake up screaming his lungs out. Nothing seem to be able to stop him (tried everything like u did). After a week or so, one night, i was feeding him at about 8pm (Cos we came home late) and after he finished his milk, he started playing with us and didn't doze off till about 10pm. The night was peaceful!! No waking up till 6am the next morning!! We've been doing that since and although one or two nights he is grouchy, but he no longer screams his lungs out. perhaps you can try that too?

 

QUOTE(DATJMom @ Apr 2 2009, 08:51 PM) [snapback]1256969[/snapback]
:hug: I am so sorry that you are struggling right now. How consistent were you with CIO? How many days did you try it?


Last night was the first...but we did it only for 20-25 mins, she started sounding so horrible, like she was going to make herself sick, and I just couldn't let her cry anymore (DH was in the room for the last 5 or so, he just didn't pick her up at first, until she started sounding like that. I went up there to get her, and he'd picked her up right then too)

But, it does seem to be getting better...I mean, the first night was 2 am, the next was 11/11:30, the next (night I wasn't here, DH was) was sometime before 10, and last night was 9ish. Last night I finally got her to sleep not too long after this post, I laid her in my bed, on her belly and rubbed her back. I may try putting her on her belly more, maybe she's more comfy that way?

I just don't understand, cause she does PERFECT in the day for naps, and does not wake up screaming like that.

 

Our nap schedule at that age was the same. My boys went to bed at 6:30. Maybe try bumping bedtime even earlier tonight (by maybe 15 mins?). When I did CIO I let them cry for 10mins, went in and rubbed their back/belly, said "it's bedtime, time to sleep" and left the room. After 20 more mins of crying I went in and just rubbed their back/belly. I then waited until they had cried for 45 mins and by then they were only whimpering so I stayed out and they fell asleep. It is hard to listen to them cry, but sometimes they get themselves so worked up it takes that to calm them down (at least for my kids anyway). Even now, when the tantrums happen, they like to be left alone and trying to soothe them makes it worse.