I need daycare!

I give up, I need daycare. My family is telling me not to do it, but I have to. Before I had the twins, everyone was willing to help and all was going to be well. My mom left my dad (after 31 years) just 5 weeks before J&R were born, and my IL's have basically written us off. Since they were 10 days old I've been here alone. My grandma helps me sometimes when she's not traveling, but sometimes she's gone for weeks or months on end. Jackson's giving us h*ll at nighttime and naptimes with screaming. I'm working nights and can't get any rest. Today I'm up at 5am, I have to stay with the twins alone until 5 when DH gets home, then I work 7p-730a tomorrow. With commute time, I'll be awake and working 28+ hours! I can't keep going like this. Help me find someone to watch my kids!
Jaime

 

I give up, I need daycare. My family is telling me not to do it, but I have to. Before I had the twins, everyone was willing to help and all was going to be well. My mom left my dad (after 31 years) just 5 weeks before J&R were born, and my IL's have basically written us off. Since they were 10 days old I've been here alone. My grandma helps me sometimes when she's not traveling, but sometimes she's gone for weeks or months on end. Jackson's giving us h*ll at nighttime and naptimes with screaming. I'm working nights and can't get any rest. Today I'm up at 5am, I have to stay with the twins alone until 5 when DH gets home, then I work 7p-730a tomorrow. With commute time, I'll be awake and working 28+ hours! I can't keep going like this. Help me find someone to watch my kids!
Jaime

 

I'm sorry things are so tough! Are you near a college with an early childhood program? Maybe you could find a college student to come in the days after you work so you can sleep. Where do you live? I'd fill in sometimes if I could!

 

Jaime, I was thinking the same thing. Maybe you can get a Mother's helper to watch the boys for at least a few hours during the day. Something has to give, and unfortunately it is about to be you

 

Yes, you definitely need to get someone to help you. You can't keep on like that, and if your screen name is right, you are a RN and need to be at your best with the patients and their lives.

Even if you maybe had someone come in for a few hours in the afternoon to give you some rest time would be helpful, such as a college student or a high school student after school. I'm sure you don't work every night so maybe getting a slot at the daycare for part time would be beneficial and easier on your bank account.

Please for yourself, enlist some help. I don't see what the big deal is about daycare and why people are telling you not to. I guess it's because we had no choice, but I really like sending mine to daycare now. They get interaction with other kids and they do lots of activities such as music time, painting, outside play with all their classmates.

 

You need help! Whether it's a mother's helper or daycare, do whatever suits your needs best. Going on 28+ hrs with no sleep is not good. Who cares what the rest of the family says, they aren't raising your children, you are. IF they have such a problem with daycare, then why don't they come over and help you?

 

Jaime, I think you absolutely should do it for your sanity. There is something to be said for having them exposed to other kids and learning to play with others etc. I know it's not the ideal situation for many, but you need the help and I think you should go for it!

 

quote:
Originally posted by Snittens:
Who cares what the rest of the family says, they aren't raising your children, you are. IF they have such a problem with daycare, then why don't they come over and help you?


Ditto!! Where are these family members when you need someone to help you get some rest? Makes no sense to me.

I put mine in a private home day care and went back to work after staying home with them for 14 months. It was the best decision for all of us. The boys are really coming out of their shell socially, and they play out lots of energy there so they're so pooped at night they zonk right out at bedtime and we hardly ever hear a peep out of them until morning, unless they are sick or their teething is bothering them. If these family members that are dishing out their "free advice" aren't jumping in and giving you the help you obviously need to be a healthy mom, then it's time to recruit outside help, whether it be a nanny or day care. Good luck with your decision! Let us know how it works out.

Jamie