I hate this comment...(vent)

"Glad it's you and not me." It never fails every time I am out somewhere with the twins I get this comment from a stranger. Well, today I guess I finally heard it one too many times. I just looked at the lady and said, "Yes I am glad it’s me and not you. I feel blessed that God gave me two babies to care for." She looked at me crazy and walked off. I know I should be nice because it’s the holiday season but I guess I just get sick of hearing that everywhere we go. I don't think people mean it in a negative way but it sounds negative when they say it. Maybe I got upset because I haven't had my Zoloft today . Anyhoo thanks for letting me vent.

 

"Glad it's you and not me." It never fails every time I am out somewhere with the twins I get this comment from a stranger. Well, today I guess I finally heard it one too many times. I just looked at the lady and said, "Yes I am glad it’s me and not you. I feel blessed that God gave me two babies to care for." She looked at me crazy and walked off. I know I should be nice because it’s the holiday season but I guess I just get sick of hearing that everywhere we go. I don't think people mean it in a negative way but it sounds negative when they say it. Maybe I got upset because I haven't had my Zoloft today . Anyhoo thanks for letting me vent.

 

I FEEL THE SAME WAY! I have 7 week old twins and a 17 month old. ALL BOYS! I don't even like my old play date friends to come over anymore because all they say is "I'm glad its you and not me" -or "is it always this crazy?"

i need to make friends with some other twin mommies.

thanks for the vent. it is nice to know that others get annoyed.

 

That & when they say "Here comes Double Trouble" I just smile and politely say "I like to look at it as being Double Blessed"

 

I agree--I get it a lot too! Most of the time I just laugh, but I once said, "yes, I think God gives us what we can handle" and walked away.

You didn't say anything mean or wrong...sometimes the comments get to be too much, don't they? I prefer the people who say, "Wow, twins AND a toddler...God bless you!" because it feels nicer.

 

I hate it too! I get it al the time as well, I'm sure we all do! I did have a woman tell me the other day that I was so blessed. She probably thought I was crazy by my response but I excitedly said "thank you, everyone else treats me like I am cursed, it really is a blessing!" I was just so happy that I didn't get the "my, your hands are full/I don't see how you do it comments"!

 

I hate it too, that's when I smile and say, "I agree."

 

Uggh, I HATE that comment too. I get a lot of people who think twins are this horrible terrible things. Oh, I couldn't handle twins, or comments of that nature.

 

I don't care for that one either, even if it is true!

 

yesterday at the mall a woman walked past me and said, "wow, you are some woman!" It was a compliment because the mall was crazy and I was moving like I was on an intense mission. Love those kinds of comments.

Lately when I get a comment that is annoying, I give an annoying smile and keep walking and basically act as if what they just said was so ridiculous that they dont deserve my time to stop and answer them. I have also come to the realization that the people who make negative comments must have a lot of negative things going on in their lives because there is no other way to look at it besides seeing the miracle that twins really are!!!!!

 

My favorite comeback...

a heartfelt "me, too!" (with some emphasis). It sort of takes the commenter a minute or too to sort it out (that it is sort of a snappy comeback), and you often get a look like -- did you just "dis" me?

40+mom

 

Geesh I thought it would be over once the babies were born. I recived that comment at a Christmas party last weekend and Respnded with "ywah, God only gives twins to special people." The room of ladies just stared at me. I smiled back and pretended I didn't know my comment was rude.

I know I shouldn't have done that, but it did feel good to finaly say something back

 

quote:
Geesh I thought it would be over once the babies were born.


Unfortunately it gets worse once the babies are born!

 

I really can't take comments from strangers that close to ma heart as many moms here do. They are only strangers, people who I'll neve meet again in my life. I forget about them as soon as they move out of my sight. There's so many good things to remember - just forget about this one!

 

Usually, I get the really good comments and compliments. I can only remember a couple of times people told me that they were glad it was me and not them. None of the comments really bother me. I like showing off the kiddos, and they are beautiful!

 

I've only really gotten "better you than me" once or twice...and I just smiled and shook my head...when they were younger I mostly had really rude people ask me if I was breastfeeding...I nearly asked someone if they wanted a peek one day...(and no I didn't nurse)

 

At first the comments bothered me. Then I mellowed out a bit, and I have become accustomed to them because no matter where you go you get stopped at least 3 times! Recently a stranger said "I pitty you." I couldn't believe that one! People always ask my toddler, "Do you love your little sister and Brother?" She is not fond of that question, but I do hear her say it when she plays with her toys as well as "You have your hands full!" Just last week a stranger tried to argue with me that one was so much bigger than the other that they couldn't be twins! That was a first!

jennifer

 

I know it can be a pain, but I guess I just remind myself that before I had twins I was pretty fascinated when I would see a family with twins out and about. I was out shopping yesterday and I think I was stopped more than I have ever been since my girls were born! Luckily, they were all positive comments and even though I really had a ton of things to get done in a short amount of time, I thought it was pretty cool that others thought my girls were as amazing as I do! When you do get one of those comments that gets under your skin it's always best to reply with a smile and say "I agree!" to whatever it is they say. You have to get used to it somehow because you will never stop hearing it!

 

The only time I've ever gotten truly offended by somebody's thoughtless comment was when a stranger asked if I had twins & I said yes....then she said, "I'M SO SORRY!!!" and HUGGED me! Like I needed consolation or something! I just shrugged her off & walked away. Right now I try not to let the stupid comments bother me & they do seem to have tapered off a lot. When the babies are older, though & can understand what people are saying, I don't think I could let a comment go. I grew up as the oldest of 8 kids and we got comments ALL the time. And you know what, it does affect you as a kid!

Recently I was shopping in Target, amist all the Christmas shopping chaos. Like 50 ft away I spied another couple with twins & they saw me at the same time. We just kind of smiled with understanding smiles & nodded. It was cool.

 

Yeah that and the double trouble comment really tick me off.

 

I get tired of comments in general sometimes...good or bad, sometimes I just want to get in and get out and not have to talk with anyone. One that has really ticked me off that I've heard the past couple of weeks..."A boy and a girl?...oh, I thought she was a girl because of the curls"...hasn't anyone ever seen a boy with curls? And, it's not like I can style his hair! Not to mention, I always dress them very boy-like and alike or coordinating! UGH! Oh well, for some reason people always seem compelled to make comments. Atleast we have a good place to vent!

 

OH! Ha Ha! I've been getting the exact same comment...oh one boy and one girl and I've got two girls! They are always in pink because that is what we were given AND they have either purple with pink hearts blankets with them or the yellow with pink hearts blankets with them! Come on people! Does anyone actually ask if both babies are twins? We've been getting the " oh, two babies, oh are they twins?" I'm so tired of that one! When they see me with all four of my children that's when I get the bless you comment! How funny people are!
Sheryl

 

Ewwwwww..... I hate that comment too. It always makes me cringe, and then I have to bite my tongue.

 

I get really irritated with all of the negative comments as well. I also can't stand answering the 50,000 questions people ask every single time I go out. It's like people have never seen twins before. But, I will say that I have found strangers are alot more willing to give me a hand by opening doors for me when I have the boys in the stroller and by moving things out of my way so I can get through, for this I am grateful.

 

I really havn't gottin that one, but the touble trouble I get every time I go out. It really ticks me off , I started telling people that my kids aren't trouble and not to call them that. When the girls get older I don't want them to hear that stuff and hurt their feelings. People are so thoughtless.

 

I haven't got that one yet but when I take them all 3 to the store, I will get strangers saying "THAT looks hard." What I don't understand is when i get that comment the kids are quiet, behaving and having fun. So what is hard about that.

 

I guess I should get used to all the comments. I have not been anywhere yet my babies just came home, but when i do go out I will have my twins and my 2 ,4 and 9 year old. Oh the looks I am sure to get.

 

I posted here over the summer about how I lost my sh*t at some lady in Target who said "better you than me" when she saw my girls. I find "double trouble" annoying, but not so bad - gotta admit, they are double the trouble sometimes! But "better you than me" is just plain rude and obnoxious. Some people try and say it's a backhanded compliment, but that's still crappy.

Much nicer, though, are all the grandma-aged ladies who come up to me and tell me about their grown-up twins and what a blessing they are. Or the set of ID twins - about my age - who stopped me last weekend to tell me how amazing it is to have a twin, etc. That really made my day.