I hate the question...

Are they identical?
Yes they are identical. Yes I know they don't LOOK identical. Then I have to go into a spew of how they had TTTS blah blah blah. Just shut up and say "my what handsome boys you have" ! I swear I get this question all the time. Its like they dont believe me when i say that they are identical... like i have to prove it to them or something...

ok vent over. =D
love you all!

 

We had IUGR with a full pound + difference. I know what you mean!! (see website below for pics)

 

People can be very rude. Sorry you have to deal with it *hugs*

Dianna

 

:hug99: Sorry. Peoples curiosity gets the best of them sometimes.

 

:hug99: I feel your frustation. :hug99: I wish people could ask questions and not appear as if they are insensitive, when they really are just interested.

 

I get that too, and my girls are SO fraternal! Um, did you even look at them?!? This one is tan!

Sometimes I think people just like to hear themselves talk.

 

OMG! I get that sometimes too..."Are you sure they are ID?" No, I like to lie to strangers!

Mine have a 5 lb. weight difference, so Jake's face is fuller and he is a good inch or so taller. Beyond that, yes they are ID!

 

QUOTE(EmilyM @ Jul 23 2008, 06:29 AM) [snapback]890890[/snapback]
:hug99: I feel your frustation. :hug99: I wish people could ask questions and not appear as if they are insensitive, when they really are just interested.


Me too, Emily! Most of the time I don't mind the questions, it's just getting old after 9 months of the same questions over and over again!

 

:hug99: I'm sorry. I get the questions too. They're b/g :lol: . People are pretty friendly to us. I'm sorry you ran into rudeness. People should be more sensitive :hug99: .

 

If you dont know them-dont feel like you have to explain-if they say they dont look identical just say "well they are" and leave it at that. People are so nosey!!!
I always get-do twins run in your family? And I just say "nope, we just go lucky!" instead of explaining my fertility issues and using clomid.

 

I get the same. Are they identical. Um, no, Did you look at them? One is blond and quite chubby and the other is very slender and has brown hair!!!

 

People just like to talk I think. DH is the best at handling these situations- he just looks at the person when they try to argue. Its the best because it really unnerves people and shuts them up!

 

Sorry about getting all the questions, they can be frustrating. We get that a lot despite ours being b/g and the boy is tanner then his sister. We also get, "Two boys?" frequently. As much as I want to snap that one boy is all boy and the other likes to pretend she's a boy, no they are not. I have to remember that Sophia does not have a lot of hair, is usually in her car seat in public and what most people see of her is usually wide blue eyes staring back at them.

 

I hear you. I think people just don't know what to say :unknw: . Mine are identical as well, but when people look at pictures they look different. I then have to explain that because of how they layed in me that their faces and heads are shaped different. They do weigh almost exactly the same so I am glad they have the differences. Its like they think I am saying they are identical just because. Also, I get asked all the time if I used fertility treatments. I didn't, but if I did it is none of their business. People can be so rude, even if they don't mean to be.

 

I really believe that people just don't think before they talk! Plus, I think the general population is clueless about twins and is fascinated by them and thats an automatic Twin question, KWIM? It drives me crazy too!

 

I always get that question too. Even after they see they are boy/girl twins and comment on how lucky we are for getting one of each. I'm so tempted to say, "uh, no. One's a girl and one's a boy"

 

I honestly think that the general population just doesn't understand "fraternal" vs. "identical". After the "two boys?" question (I have a girl and a boy), we without fail get, "Are they identical?". To which I always say, "No, it's a boy and a girl...their parts are definitely not identical."

The flustered look on the asker's face always makes me giggle a bit on the inside

 

I get alot of this too. When I say "yes" and then the person asking continues to say "they don't look identical" I feel like I have to go on to explain how they had TTTS and how it affects them because of this and that. I mean, we flew out of state to have the laser surgery to correct it and some of the amniotic fluid was sent out for testing so we know they are even though they do look different right now.

It does get old feeling like we have to always explain things. Maybe I'll do what one of the pp's said and just say "well, they are" and leave it at that!!

 

QUOTE(DeniseT @ Jul 23 2008, 10:42 AM) [snapback]891265[/snapback]
I always get that question too. Even after they see they are boy/girl twins and comment on how lucky we are for getting one of each. I'm so tempted to say, "uh, no. One's a girl and one's a boy"


Me too! Seriously?!?! I really can't believe how dense some people are....

 

People can be so weird. I get the same thing--though mine are fraternal. Are they identical? Um....are you blind? One has brown eyes. One has green. And frankly, they don't look anything alike otherwise either--different coloring, different sizes, one has a little bit of hair, the other doesn't. I have a friend with b/g twins that she always dresses in gender identifying clothing, and people ask her if hers are ID. Dumb.

Have you considered lying? I used to do it all the time when I was pregnant. Like around 6 months when you look like most people who are about to deliver one baby look. I had one too many long conversations in the grocery store (one time it took me an hour to buy three lemons because of the questions).... So I would just smile and say "any day now" and walk away. I felt a little bit bad about it because I am usually a very honest person; but a lot of their questions were starting to fall into the "it's really none of your business" category.

 

I remember when I was pregnant and I stopped a twin mom to ask her about her stroller. My dad was too funny because he said "they look so much alike" -- the type of stroller had a tinted plastic for UV protection plus a screen over it, so there was really NO way he could get a good look at them. ( i have this stroller now and I know) it shows people just want to say something....

Heather

 

This is the one thing I'm really not looking forward to at all! Or wasn't until I had a thought. If twins are like this unspoken invite to people to come over and paw at my babies and ask me any question under the sun, what's to stop me from pawing at them, telling them how cute they are and asking them how they were conceived. I mean, after all, my mom always told me that if I didn't want to do all the talking, I should ask people about themselves and they'll do all the talking. I mean, I could really have a lot of fun with this! I've seen lists and lists of fun answers to give people.

But like the pp said, I really don't like to lie to people, but on the other hand, if someone is being rude to me, even if they don't mean to, I don't feel any need to make them feel at ease or answer the personal questions.

So here's what I came up with. Before the person can ask anything, I ask them "Are you a twin?" (even if they say no) "Are you ID?" "How were you conceived?" "Are you sure you're ID?" That way, I don't have to answer anything. I'm going to have so much fun with this. Maybe I should start hanging out at the mall....

 

QUOTE(bigeyes @ Jul 23 2008, 01:36 AM) [snapback]890728[/snapback]
Are they identical?
Yes they are identical. Yes I know they don't LOOK identical. Then I have to go into a spew of how they had TTTS blah blah blah. Just shut up and say "my what handsome boys you have" ! I swear I get this question all the time. Its like they dont believe me when i say that they are identical... like i have to prove it to them or something...

ok vent over. =D
love you all!


I hate that question too, but because I have a boy and a girl, and people always act sorry for me that they are not identical, like, oh, well that's okay too.

 

QUOTE(Vivian @ Jul 25 2008, 12:15 PM) [snapback]895967[/snapback]
This is the one thing I'm really not looking forward to at all! Or wasn't until I had a thought. If twins are like this unspoken invite to people to come over and paw at my babies and ask me any question under the sun, what's to stop me from pawing at them, telling them how cute they are and asking them how they were conceived. I mean, after all, my mom always told me that if I didn't want to do all the talking, I should ask people about themselves and they'll do all the talking. I mean, I could really have a lot of fun with this! I've seen lists and lists of fun answers to give people.

But like the pp said, I really don't like to lie to people, but on the other hand, if someone is being rude to me, even if they don't mean to, I don't feel any need to make them feel at ease or answer the personal questions.

So here's what I came up with. Before the person can ask anything, I ask them "Are you a twin?" (even if they say no) "Are you ID?" "How were you conceived?" "Are you sure you're ID?" That way, I don't have to answer anything. I'm going to have so much fun with this. Maybe I should start hanging out at the mall....


:rofl:

 

[SIZE=10pt] :love0028:

I have b/g twins and there were people that would stop us while we were out and ask "Are they ID?" Hmmm ~ one is in a pink carseat dressed in pink, the other a blue carseat dressed in blue???? YEAH, they're identical :umm:

We would also get the two boys? two girls?

I think some people just want to look at the babies..so they start talking without thinking <_<

April [/SIZE]

 

I get that constantly, but mine are fraternal! One blond hair/blue eyed, the other dark hair/brown eyed. Yes, they look alike and are definitely sisters, but not identical. People want to argue with you about it, ugh!

 

I get it too sometimes even though mine are b/g. It's funny, I usually try to be kind and just say, no they are fraternal, then one of my older children will chime in and say, no because they are a boy and a girl. They have to be both boys or both girls to be identical, because that's what it means. Identical means that they are the same. LOL. Some times people just don't think about what they say.

 

while i'm sure that people are well-meaning and it's good of us to assume the best of them, i don't think we owe any explanations to anyone. mine aren't id's but i get q's all the time. i take them out every day and get approached several times about everything from what gender they are to how old my dh is! i do try to assume the best of people but when i get annoyed i try to remind myself that i don't HAVE to tell anyone anything..... that way, i don't let them make me feel too badly, kwim?

hang in there!

 

QUOTE(itsnancycozzi @ Jul 23 2008, 10:28 AM) [snapback]891216[/snapback]
Sorry about getting all the questions, they can be frustrating. We get that a lot despite ours being b/g and the boy is tanner then his sister. We also get, "Two boys?" frequently. As much as I want to snap that one boy is all boy and the other likes to pretend she's a boy, no they are not. I have to remember that Sophia does not have a lot of hair, is usually in her car seat in public and what most people see of her is usually wide blue eyes staring back at them.


I hear ya, I always get a boy and a girl and I have two boys. I also want to say, did you even look at them. Have you tried going for a walk on a community trail, its impossible to make it there and back without being stopped. My small guy has blue eyes and no hair so they think he is a girl!!!!!urgggggg