I feel like crying every morning-hopefully someone can help!

Ok, every morning it is the same thing. I have to tell my boys (who just turned 5) at least ten times-get up, go potty, get dressed and brush your teeth. They should know the routine by now. I just feel like a broken record-I will start getting ready myself for work and they are not doing anything-or worse yet playing with toys in their room still wearing their pajamas. I try not to get upset but seriously this is wearing me down-I feel like a drill instructor every morning. I always feel rushed because I have to get them to school by 8am so that they get breakfast-but I have to almost focus 100% on them otherwise if I do anything-put the dog out, etc they get distracted and do not get ready.

I am considering gettting up earlier myself and getting ready and then just supervising them till we get out the door instead of trying to do 2 things at once.
I would just like a peaceful morning for once. I swear, when I get to work at 8:20 I am exhausted.

Any ideas from moms who have gone through this? Is this normal for this age? I try so hard to keep my cool but some days I just lose it after the 25th time of telling them that we need to get going and then I feel like such a horrible mom when I yell at them.

Thanks for reading this,
Theresa

 

You probably don't want to hear this, but my boys, at 8 years old, are pretty much the same way. Although, this school year they are finally able to go upstairs and get dressed on their own without too much fooling around. I remember when my kids were toddlers and I would read those parenting tips that suggested leaving more time to do things so you don't feel rushed and end up yelling at the kids. Not helpful at all in my case--no matter how much time was left, the kids would play, fool around, etc. and use it all up....I suppose I'll just send them off to college with a loud alarm clock and hope for the best

 

My 6 yo boys are kind of the same. We have 2 alarm clocks in their bed room and they sleep right through the darn "loud" things. I end up having to go back and wake them up and CARRY their butts out. They are supposed to get up at 7, but they are not Awake until around 7:30. That leaves us 35 min. to eat, get dressed, me get their breakfast, pack lunches and water bottles and pack their backpacks, oh and get them dressed! Thankfully though, I don't work during the week, I go to school and don't have to be there until later, or I would never be ready. They don't play in the morning until they are outside waiting for the bus through. All of their toys are down in the basement, which seriously helps.

 

When my first was in preschool I used to dress him at night and have him sleep in his clothes. It really cut down on the morning aggravation.

 

I always get ready first. I wake all the boys at 7, have their clothes laid out, and tell them to get ready. If they are really dragging, I help the 5 year olds get dressed. I also have set a timer and said, "You have 4 minutes to get dressed and down to breakfast. Go!" and they think that's fun to try to beat the timer.

I have to tell them constantly through breakfast to keep eating and get their teeth brushed, but I usually eat with them, so it's not a big deal. Frustrating, yes, but it doesn't take away from my time.

 

We're really struggling with this too at the moment. I find if I can get up before them and be ready to go it does help a lot, but some days its hard to jump in that shower at 6am.

 

If I don't stand over DD, she takes forever to get ready too. She doesn't tend to play anymore but she stares out into sleepy space. It isn't until she gets her breakfast in her that she perks up.

 

At 13, some days I still struggle with this issue. Mornings honestly can be the most stressful time of the day here.

 

I think all the PP gave some great tips! I'm right there with you with my 6yo DS. What I've started to do is wake him up, grab his clothes and walk behind him down the stairs, into the living room to get dressed (we have an open floor-plan so I can see him from the kitchen). I tinker around getting coffee and his lunch made, make breakfast all while keeping an eye on him and snapping him out of dream land from time to time. His attention seems to get much better after he eats. If it continues to be a problem for you, maybe you could give them breakfast first?

 

Hmm, I don't have this problem. We have certain things that we do at certain times and if I am even a minute late sometimes they call me on it. The other morning it was 7:35 and at 7:30 we usually talk about breakfast, Kayla looks at me and says "Moooommmm, you haven't said, so what are we doing for breakfast today" and she said it exactly with the phrasing I use. It made me burst out laughing.

I don't know why I don't have issues, sometimes they have their shoes and jackets on at 8 and we don't have to go out to the bus stop until 8:15. I get ready while they do so I don't know if that is a fix.

Do the boys get into time? Could you set certain times? We get up anytime between 7 and 7:30, breakfast at 7:30, bathroom and dressed at 8 and jackets/shoes at 8:15. If I am even a minute late myself I hear about it.

 

My girls are NOT morning people. They drag EVERY day. Morgan will sit there until I am about ready to leave if I don't stay on top of her. Brooke is a little better than that though. II dress while they dress too, I just keep having to go check on them every few minutes. Oh, and getting them to even eat, well that's a whole other issue. Both give me a hard time and refuse food. I have tried everything and every food too.

 

Im not any help but my girls are going to be 4 and my son will be 7 and its the same thing here... I just resort to using a timer and no TV on ...I think that thats just the way it is so I dont get upset to often

:hug99:

 

Thanks for all the responses-I am sure it does not help that I am tired when I wake up-there just never seems to be enough time in the day. I do try to keep a routine because if we are not out of the house by 7:25 am then the boys miss breakfast at school-which I really hate because then I have to try to find something for them to eat in the car and it is never that healthy.

Sometimes I just get so stressed out and and lose control and yell and then when I am at work I just think about why I am getting so stressed out-ok so they miss a decent breakfast here and there-so what-it is not like they are going to starve because of it or have a weight problem because they eat a pack of cookies every once in a while in the car on the way to school.

I am so glad to know that I am not alone in this morning battle. I will be setting their alarm clock or maybe two (one for each of them and see how it goes).
I really like the timer idea as well-I do think that is part of the problem-they really do not understand time yet.

Thanks for all the responses-this morning I just tried to chill out and not get so mad and stressed out.
Theresa

 

Why don't you make sure you have a few healthier than cookie choices at home you can grab on the go if you know they aren't going to make it. If they know they get something like cookies or fast food for running late, it isn't going to encourage them to get ready faster. Buy a box on Nutrigrain bars and let them know that is their breakfast if they don't get to school on time.

 

QUOTE(momotwinsmom @ Nov 9 2007, 01:13 PM) [snapback]488700[/snapback]
My girls are NOT morning people. They drag EVERY day.

This is my problem too. My boys are night owls like me and my dad. They are NOT morning people at all.

 

I have also thought about getting one of these timers that gives a visual warning when time is running out on getting a task done. I thought it might be good to set on the table during breakfast so they know when they are running out of time to eat....

http://www.leapsandbounds.com/catalog/prod...Search#products

 

I love that timer-thanks for the link-this is something I am going to get. I am also going to take away the toys from their room for now because they are just a distraction in the morning-I cannot tell you how many meltdowns they have had because they cannot find their power rangers, transformers, etc. My day goes so much better if they eat breakfast at school plus they separate better-I think that is why I get so stressed out-because I have to get their by 8:00 am and honestly I absolutely hate them eating in the car-no matter what they get-healthy or not-one of them drops the bag and then it is just a big mess all over.

I really am glad I am not the only one-it does not help that I am tired when I wake up.
Theresa

 

QUOTE(momotwinsmom @ Nov 9 2007, 01:13 PM) [snapback]488700[/snapback]
My girls are NOT morning people. They drag EVERY day.


Same with us. Mornings are such a hectic time at our house. My girls take after me though. I remember always being ill in the mornings as a child, even in high school, and I was late for school a lot!

You are certainly not alone!

 

Mygirls are 5. I'm a school librarian and they're in full-day pre-school. We have to leave at the latest, 7:15.
I always lay out their clothes the night before. they know that's the time to discuss what they want to wear.
I've found it definitely pays to get completely ready before I get them up -- that includes eating and packing my lunch, if I'm going to.
They eat breakfast at school. Sometimes they ask to eat at home. The rule for that is they can only eat at home if they've gotten themselves up and dressed on their own -- and even then, they have to be ready to eat by 6:30.

When I am nearly ready, I go in and turn on a lamp in their room and start a CD of kids' music. I don't even speak to them then. I'll come back after 5 minutes if they're not up and tell them good morning. I just started the music about 2 months ago, and that's made the biggest difference in their morning mood.

It is also a very stressful time for us. I'll sometimes talk to them about it on the way, especially if one of them got upset about not getting to eat at home or something. I ask them if they can tell me what slowed us down that morning and how we can do better tomorrow. I'll sometimes apologize if they say I was mean to them , but the main thing is we plan how to improve. Then we get over it and sing. I like to drop them off happy .

 

yep, I have the same problem... the boys are 6. I have gotten them up earlier, it does not really help much. I took Mic to the DR and he is now on meds for attention def. It is not good for him but he does listen and do his work at school and he even wants to clean his room. I was up to my eyeballs and was fed up, now it is much better. once he is doing better everyday, i want to ween him off but for now it has saved my sanity and his butt! Good luck!

 

How's it going, Theresa? Any improvement since you first posted? I would certainly try getting yourself up and getting ready before your boys get up, like a few pp's suggested. It's what I always did when I worked full-time when my first two were in pre-school-elementary school. That way I could focus on them: making their breakfast, supervising dressing, hair-do's, etc. Laying out clothes and lunch items (non-perishable, of course) the night before helps, too.

 

I too was wondering if things had improved a little for you?
In our home anything that can be done the night before is taken care of. I fear leaving some things for the next day. I ask the night before: what color uniform shirt. It all gets laid out in the living room. The belts are already looped into the pants/shorts. Socks and shoes are on the floor by the couch. School sweaters/jackets are next to backpacks if they're going to need one. Backpacks are ready and waiting only for the water bottles that are waiting ready in the fridge. Snacks and lunches are prepared and anything that doesn't need the fridge is in the lunch box and the rest gets thrown in in the am while 4 frozen waffles toast in the morning. I buy the cinnnamon nutri-grain ones. They don't know they're healthy and they can eat them w/out butter or syrup, so we can eat in the car on the way. Sometimes a wheat bagel w/ a little cream cheese. I teach where they attend school, so I get ready about 30 mins before they get up. We all arrive at school together, and done. Not perfect, but functional.

 

Similar to Tripsmommy, our mornings seem to be much smoother when we take the time to prepare the night before. Our days are not perfect, but our boys' bedtime routine/checklist includes time to put toys away (so there are fewer distractions in the morning) and to choose and set out their clothes for the following day. They have a calendar in their room, and when they do all the steps in their bedtime routine, they can put a sticker on their calendar for that day. We buy small star stickers in the classroom section at Staples. I try to figure out the night before what to give for breakfast - usually something quick like frozen waffles or cereal. We also have morning routines for the boys. Our mornings are still pretty rushed, but one motivator might be to have a reward if they do their checklist within a set time (using the timer)? Maybe they can take out one toy to play with after they eat breakfast? We put their bedtime and morning routines into checklists (with clip-art and simple words in a big font so they don't need me to tell them what to do next). They are also laminated, so the boys check off as they go with a grease pencil. Then we wipe off with dry paper towels later to start all over again. Just sharing what has worked in our house! --P.

 

Hang in there!!!

 

My DD is 13 and she still does this!! UNLESS I sleep in, then she does just fine! DH wakes her up on his way out but if she sleeps in and I wake her up at say 7:30, she can be ready by 7:45. If I'm up with her, she depends on my to keep saying, hurry up etc. KIDS!!!

 

I have been noticing my girls just recently seem very distracted when I am trying to tell them what to do. I have to say it numerous times and even then don't alway jump to action. We don't do ANYTHING quickly unless I take them by the hands and walk them through the steps. Even then they don't "move quickly."

My girls don't like getting up in the morning either. My mom taught me to sit on their bed and start reading books. This always works. If I'm in a hurry I turn cartoons on the TV....but then I have to get them away from it to get dressed.

 

My boys are still under 4, but one of them takes forever to get his little butt in gear. I like all the suggestions!

When my dd was about the same age, I made her a picture chart of all the stuff she needed to do before we walked out the door.


I had a toilet for going potty (she couldn't read yet, so it was dual purpose, since I had the words printed too)

I had a toothbrush for brushing her teeth

clothes for getting dressed

bowl with spoon for breakfast

I know there was something else, but I can't remember what else we had.

She was pretty excited to not be yelled at and would run out and check the chart until she had everything done.

Although at almost 12, I think I still need that chart! LOL