I am so sick of doctors!

I am back from my 35 week apt today and just feel so po'd at doctors. I read many posts here about doctors taking preventative measures and following things closely. I swear I have yet to have an appointment with my personal ob or any from the practice that are not reading the chart for the first time as they meet with me. I go in there wanting to discuss this severe pain I have in my groin making it hard to walk and I just get a 'oh well that is common this stage in pregnancy.' Everything I am going through is 'common' and expected and while that makes sense to a degree, these 3 minute meetings do nothing to assuage my concerns b/c I feel like they totally dismiss and minimize everything I bring up. I have to meet w/all the OB's in the practice, but whenever I do they always defer any practical question "what is the protocol for c-sec when you have a breech baby this late?" to discuss w/my doctor, so what is the point of meeting with them!? And if I hear (at 35 weeks today) one more time "Your babies are fine now" I will scream b/c YES they will likely survive but not necessarily are they out of the woods for premature complications. That is not "fine" in my book, why is it in theirs, when they are trained medical professionals?

What drives me nuts is I had this experience w/my first daughter which is why I originally sought to work with a midwife 2nd time around. When I found out it was twins, I had established a very good relationship with my OB who I now realize is a fantastic GYN MD, but not so fantastic at OB. So I feel like despite my best effort to find a doctor in the beginning who I felt comfortable with and could trust, he just isn't going the distance with me. Now I am looking down the last few weeks of pregnancy and trying to just deal with it, but I have all these frustrations built up and am trying to work through them so I don't freak out on him next week. Even though I think he deserves a little freak out...

Thanks for listening to my rant!

 

Feel free to rant away!!! It sucks that you are so frustrated. And if it makes you feel better to freak on the Dr, go ahead, he'll just chalk it up to a pregnant woman's hormones

 

Chicagomama- you're not in Denver, but it sure feels like it. Or maybe my docs take commuter planes to see you as well. I get the same laissez-faire service at my appointments. I'm not a fool, ok, so you can stop treating me like one. :grr: I absolutely HATE my docs- it's a question of whom do I like best of the group of 8 + 2 peris. There is 1 but he won't be doing my C-Section that's scheduled- he's out that week.

I have been treating myself since the day I saw my first peri and he'd never heard of Dr. Luke's book about multiples and diet. He said I shouldn't gain too much weight since I'd get post-partum depression from it. I replied I don't care about my size... I care about having big babies. He said that I probably wouldn't want them to be so big- I said there is a big difference in ability between 4 and 6 pounds, so yes, I do want them to be big. I would love 7 lb-ers with fat rolls! I asked about when I should get off work- he said whenever I was too tired & he didn't want to mess with my FMLA. I told him I don't qualify for FMLA- he interrupted me, saying, "Yes, you do". I said that I didn't, as I haven't worked for my company for a year, yet. I realize I'm young (25) but I'm not stupid. I worked in HR and am clear on FMLA rules. The other peri I saw "treated" me for PUPPPS- said he couldn't do anything but prescribe an antihistimine (Atarax) which wouldn't clear up the rash until after delivery. I went online, found natural cures & am 95% better. He now credits himself with fixing me. :shok:

I guess the worst part is these people will not give me an honest opinion or advice as to what I should do. "Talk with your doctor" doesn't equate "Get answers from your doctor". It's like talking to a brick wall.

So, I get your frustration! I hope to deliver, have my husband get a job with better insurance than what I have & SWITCH from these marginally incompetent boobs.

Man, did that feel good!

Michelle

 

Glad you joined my rant. While I am happier with my OB at the moment I have had these ongoing frustrations for so long and I totally hear you. I also notice we are 1 day apart, each at 35weeks, so our hormonal levels must be about equal!!

 

Rant away ladies. It does good for the soul. :hug:
I don't have anything to add to this rant this week. I'm too happy to be going home next Tuesday (God Willing) after 12 weeks in the hospital for PTL. I may have something to add though when I have my 1st appointment in a while with my dr. I do see her everyday here at the hospital. Again huge :hug: to the 2 of you.

 

Hopefully he will redeem himself when the time comes

 

I hear ya, in our clinic you feel like cattle being herded in and out peeing in cups and measuring bellies and sending you on your merry way after saying everything is normal. This time I am at the same clinic only on the higher risk side and while it seems like much better care I still only see my doc himself for maybe 3 to 5 minutes. How nice would it be to feel more taken care of?! I am glad to hear you say you're feeling better with you doc right now, off to read your other thread which probably explains it.

 

Don't worry! You're not the only one who gets/got the "it's common attitude." I got that the entire pregnancy, I kept telling them something didn't seem right, I was really uncomfortable at around week 20 (maybe a little earlier), kept asking them about work cause all I did was STAND and it made the pain worse. Don't worry to them it was "common." However, I made the choice to stop working at about 24 weeks. I had been into L&D a few times and I went in one more time (almost didn't because they sent me home all the other times feeling like a moron). This time I was 3cm dilated, 90% effaced and despite getting Magnesium, they couldn't stop the labor. I had my babies at 29 weeks and I feel like if I hadn't quite working and slowed down on my own, then I would have had them earlier!

 

What is the deal? Why is it so difficult to find a great OB? I did not like my first OB at all because we never established a good relationship and I felt like she didn't really listen to my concerns. So I went with someone different for my twins and he just always talked about how "amazing" I was doing with twins, and when I did have complaints, he "poo-poo"ed them. I was so frustrated!!

It stinks, because my sister literally loves her peri and always has, since she first met him. She didn't have multiples, but she was high-risk.

Oh, well, the only thing I can say for them, is they did help to give me my healthy, beautiful babies with few complications. I'm sure the same will happen for you!

 

Is it too late to change doctors at this point?
I am only 22 weeks but can appreciate the frustration!
I really wanted to go to a nurse midwife but couldn't because its twins. I actually "interviewed" three OB's, 2 at large OB/GYN practices where you had to see everyone in rotation and then get whoever is on call for the actual birth. the 3rd and the one I went for is at a midwife practice associated with the local community hospital & the OB is the overseeing manager. So far I've only seen the midwives but when I needed to speak to the OB he was available within a couple of hours and he reviews the charts every week. nearer the birth I can request to have my appointments with him. this sounded like a better option for me - this is my first birth and was nervous to arrive at L&D and find the most junior doctor on call. the only issue is that if the babies come before 35 weeks I have to go to a bigger teaching hospital with a NICU.

I was told that if I'm not happy with an OB then to switch - but maybe 35 weeks is a little late for that.
good luck with everything. :hug:

 

Thanks for the feedback. In my mind it is too late to switch. I could request another MD w/in the practice, but I may not have my OB anyway when I go into labor! Maybe 3rd time is a charm....