How to handle Twins When they are at different levels...

So far, I have kept the kids at the same basic level in all their subjects. But, I know that there are some things where one could move ahead of the other. DS could be moving faster in math and DD could be moving faster in reading. One of the things I love about HSing is that the kids can move at their own pace, but I have not really been doing this! It isn't a matter of more work for me, but rather than I am afraid they will compare themselves and be upset that they aren't moving at the same pace. Especially the one who isn't as far ahead. I just don't want them to think they aren't doing well because the aren't at the same place as their twin! How have you handled this with your twins? Am I worried about nothing?

 

I don't homeschool and don't know much about it, but I'm sure they would face the same issue at regular school. (And in other areas of life -- for instance, Amy can ride a two-wheeler without training wheels and Sarah can't, but Sarah can do math and tell time and Amy can't.)

The nice thing about homeschooling is that at least you can be as sensitive to their feelings as possible. Also, because they're homeschooled, they won't think of there being a "fast" track, "slow" track, etc. for any subject. You can just make it clear that each of them is doing the best they can do in that subject at that time.

 

We have been doing a very loose HS K program- no formal curriculum, but largely driven by them and their interests.

My girls, too, are at different levels.

Just like kids in a traditional classroom-- we focus on each child and what they learned (vs what their peer learned and how it related to how they are doing).

DD1 is excellent at writing and at a higher reading level- DD2 is stronger in science skills, memorization, and math.

They are aware of it, but we dont ever encourage them to be any more competitive than they are (which would occur in a classroom as well).

I try to have DD1 do x and DD2 do y. Rotate subjects or do both math or both reading, but different enough topics/subjects that it is not at the same time (one child counts coins, other sorts them by amount, etc.) Or for reading-- two different books so that the level is hard to tell (good quality picture books actually have high reading levels).

For writing-- one DD is working on spelling patterns, another on letter formation next week we will switch. DD that is higher level with writing will get a 'higher' level of spelling pattern-- so same subject, different levels, and split enough that they dont really notice.

We will be having the girls attend public schools next fall to see how it goes- so that , too, may influence my opinions/outlook/long term vision.


As Alden stated her examples- my twins are already aware of certain things each one does 'better' and so far they are OK and matter of fact about it. I am sure that is temporary- but DH and will try to keep it that way as long as possible! We stress that everyone does things at a different time and that is OK (such as bike riding, loosing teeth, reading, tie shoes, tell time, writing names *one DD wrote her name months before her twin*).



The bigger deal you make out of it, the more they will think it is important.

 

The twins I'm sure will get there when I do start formaling schooling them. But I do have this issue with my older boys. Ben is 10 and approximately in the end of 6th grade for language arts and about 1/2 way through 8th grade math. David is 8 and is about 3/4 of the way through 5th grade language arts but almost completely out of 8th grade math and accelerating toward Algebra 1 and Geometry. I tried for a long time to "slow him down" as I knew he was going to surpass his older brother. But this year, it just wasn't possible anymore. I finally just sat Ben down and explained that we all have talents and this math just seems to be one of David's. I also pointed out that he is very talented also in math, but works at a different speed. WE talked about his strengths in other areas and how he can help David in those and how David could help him in math.

I would be shocked if the twins ended up going the same speed in everything. They are going to have different strengths, just because they are different people. After having to deal with the older boys, I think I'll be more apt to allow them to progress at their own speed MUCH more quickly.