How Do You Keep Them On A Schedule?

Hello,

My three month old twin daughters are sort of on a schedule of eating every threeish hours during the day, eating for the last time sometime around 7 pm, sleeping until about 2, and then getting up for the day around 6am. However, it varies from day to day. Sometimes they wake up at 5:30am, sometimes 6:30. And then maybe they don't want to eat every three hours but prefer 3.5 hours for part of the day. And of course, tonight they were starving at 5:30, even though they had eaten at 4pm. They've been sleeping ever since, so the 7pm bedtime is shot. I suspect they'll wake up to eat at 11pm instead of 2, throwing everything off.

So what am I doing wrong? Or what can I be doing differently? Everyone here seems to have their babies on a more predictable schedule by this age. I'm not really worried about sleeping through the night, just trying to figure out how you all keep your kids on a schedule. Do you wake them during the day to eat at specific times? What if they're not hungry when you feed them? Do you make them wait until the next three hour feeding?

Thanks!
Trish

 

I really only noticed any kind of schedule in the last two months or so. Lots of repitition with daily activities around the same time of day. Mine have been working towards one for awhile and still they get 'off' and we just get back on track eventually. I try not to stress out about it too much when they ARE 'off', it is definately harder for that time, but they get back on soon enough. Plus it allows me more 'mommy time' with each when they are off a bit. They still don't always get up at the same time every day or as each other, you just take it one step at a time!

As far as eating goes, they are still eating anywhere from every hour and a half to maybe three hours at max! We breastfeed on demand so we have never had any kind of eating schedule...HTH

 

QUOTE(Trishandthegirls @ Aug 7 2007, 12:08 AM) [snapback]360679[/snapback]
So what am I doing wrong? Or what can I be doing differently? Everyone here seems to have their babies on a more predictable schedule by this age. I'm not really worried about sleeping through the night, just trying to figure out how you all keep your kids on a schedule. Do you wake them during the day to eat at specific times? What if they're not hungry when you feed them? Do you make them wait until the next three hour feeding?

Thanks!
Trish


I did not have my boys on a predictable schedule by that age. It was probably more around 4-5 months or so? I usually feed them on demand, so if they're hungry, I feed them.
HTH!

 

Mine started a schedule of eating and sleeping at 3 months--up until then, it had only been an eating schedule. What worked for us, was to wake them when it was time to eat again, and go for walks and distract them if they wanted to eat too early. If it was within 45 min. of their regular feeding time, we would feed them. Also, we always worked it out so that they had their last bottle at 7, and bedtime stayed the same.

 

Hi Trish! Welcome to TS!! Congratulations on your babies!

I had mine on a 3 hour(strict) eating schedule from the beginning. Naps didn't become predictable until around 5 months. I think you are doing fine!

 

Hi there. Sounds like you're doing a great job - the babies are eating, sleeping and everyone is alive at the end of the day. I call that success! I tried to get my babies into a routine from the beginning. By about 7 weeks we had a predictable bedtime routine (bottle, bath, massage, snuggle and bed by 7) and then we worked on structured naps in their cribs, rather than in swings, etc. I followed the "E.A.S.Y." routine (eat, activity, sleep, you time) as suggested by the Baby Whisperer - although have to admit I rarely get the "you time" because there's always something to be done while the babies are sleeping (bottles to be washed and sterilized, laundry to be done, messy house to tidy, etc.). These days it's more E.A.S.A. because the babies are awake more than they used to be. I feed them on a three hour schedule throughout the day, with some flexibility, of course. If they last 3.5 hours, great. If they get hungry early, fine. If we're getting to the end of the day and it looks like their last feeding is going to be around 8 (too late in my opinion) I "cluster feed" them so they're ready for bed at a more appropriate time. I think babies do best with an early bedtime (mine do at least).

As for the wake-up time, it varies a little. But they're always up somewhere between 6 and 7:30. When they're up we start our day. I don't go by the clock per say. I just feed every three hours, sleep after no more than 2 hours of wakefulness.

Sounds like your guys are doing well. Just stick to your routine as much as possible. Sometimes this means missing out on walks, tea with a friend, etc. so life is kind of dull but your babies will thank you for it in the long run. Sometimes I get a little jealous of my friends with singletons, who are always taking their babies to the mall, etc. but I can't afford to have two babies doing their own thing in their own time - I'd never get a rest! So we're on a pretty strict routine.

I recommend the book HEALTHY SLEEP HABITS, HAPPY CHILD (www.amazon.com) to help you with a sleep routine. My guys started sleeping 12 hours around 4 months and I never let them cry (I'm too much of a wimp!). Of course we have ups and downs with teething, etc. but last night they sleep 7:30 to 6:30 so I'm happy with that!

 

Ditto CHJH, HSHHC is the best book. My girls are sleeping 6:30-6:30 every night now. They will be 3 1/2 months on Thursday and have been doing this for 2 weeks now (They were born at 36w,2d). They eat every 3.5-4 hours (6-7 oz.) They (one or the other, not both) were getting up at 3-3:45 previously. I decided one night just to give the girl that was up a paci instead of getting them both up to eat. That was the end of the that. From then on, they slept......My pedi told me when they hit 11-12 lbs. babies USUALLY start sleeping through the night.

 

You're not doing anything wrong! Sounds like you're doing great.

I believe in having a routine but not a schedule. I don't get hungry or tired by the clock, and neither does any other kid or adult I know, so why should my babies?

At 4 months, mine go anywhere from 2 to 3.5 hrs between daytime feedings, though usually 2.5-3 hrs. I feed them when they're hungry. If one wakes up hungry before the other, I try to hold them off until the other wakes up. If the hungry baby is really starving, I'll wake the other one. Feeding at the same time during the day is my biggest priority, because that way there's a much better chance of napping at the same time.

Over time, a predictable routine has emerged. They go to bed about 7-7:30 pm. There are still 1 or 2 night feedings. They're usually up and ready for the day at 7-7:30. They nurse when they wake up, then we play, then they go down for naps. They usually spend about 1.5-2 hrs awake before needing a nap.

So I don't have a "schedule" in the sense of "It's 9:30 am, therefore you're taking a nap" or "You can't eat yet because it's only 1:15." But the routine has gotten very predictable without much effort. Even without a precise by-the-clock schedule, the days are a lot easier. I know what's coming and can plan accordingly. Just give it time.

 

QUOTE(fuchsiagroan @ Aug 7 2007, 09:35 AM) [snapback]360868[/snapback]
I believe in having a routine but not a schedule.

Feeding at the same time during the day is my biggest priority, because that way there's a much better chance of napping at the same time.

I could have written your whole post, but these points I really agree with. Anytime I've tried to get my girls down at a certain time, it's always backfired. For me, I'm happy with a routine. The time part has come on its own. They are up one at 6 a.m. the other at 630 and approximately 2 1/2 to 3 hours later, they're showing signs for nap time, etc., etc..... I can almost set my watch to it (although I don't wear a watch ).

Just today my mother called to see if we wanted to go and have a picnic in the park and she asked when they would be ready to go. Since they fell asleep about 15 minutes ago, I'd give it another 45 minutes before they're awake, then they'llhave their "food" breakfast (not bottle), I'll get them dressed, put them in their Exersaucers and throw on Barney or something to occupy them for 5-10 minutes (btw, whoever wrote the intro to the Barney show is a GENIUS! I never saw babies get so excited!), jump in the shower real fast, get dressed (while talking to them) and we'll be out the door. When we get to my mother's (about 5 minutes away) I'll give them their bottles. So, I don't know what time, per se, but I have an idea because we do the same thing every day.

So for me, routine, routine, routine....that's what's worked for me. And get the books...you don't have to go by them to the letter, but they give you so many ideas. The Baby Whisperer was my go-to book every single time. Good luck!

 

I have the same questions about all these clear routines - at 4.5 months we are nowhere near that - although things are getting more predictable. Mine are nursed (one) and bottle fed EBM most of the time. They USUALLY eat at the same time during the day, and i used to be able to set a clock at 3 hours, although that is shifting. Sometimes it's a little less, sometimes a little more. I try not to let them go too long during the day because i want them fed up and hopefully sleeping longer stretches at night.

Love what the pp said: I don't eat or sleep on a schedule and neither does any other adult or kid i know..."..I LOVE the idea of a clear routine, but i know that every time i try to impose one, it backfires.

So i try to take my cues from them. I've gotten much better at reading their cues, and noting that even though they will continue to engage past the time they are tired, things go much better if i try to get them down. We have a couple of cd's that are clearly nap/bedtime ones, and a couple that are playtime ones, and they seem to respond well to that.

Oddly, sometimes they have awake/play time after eating, and sometimes they pass out. They almost always go back to sleep after their first morning feed (usually sometime between 5:30 and 7, depending on when they went down the night before. They generally go 4 hours between night feeds, but sometimes they'll stretch to almost six. (oh, joy!) I try not to stress about it too much. I WOULD like to institute an earlier bedtime, but they are just not ready at 6 or 6:30 -or even usually at 7. When we try that they often get frustrated - and so do mom and dad!

I think that strict schedules are easier if you're formula or fully bottle feeding - at least that's what i tell myself. The thought of them going 12 hours a night at this time is incomprehensible to me - but i can dream of it!

I think the most difficult thing is that when they eat at 3 hour intervals during the day, by the time we're done eating, burping, changing spit-up clothes, etc, it's so far into the next feed period that by the time i get it together to get out of the house and GET anywhere, we usually only have about 15 minutes before it's time to eat again, which is just exhausting.