How do you get them on the same (ish) schedule?

Jack and Lily take great naps but they take about 4 of them and they are always within an hour and a half of waking. One may sleep 45 minutes, one may sleep 2-3 hours. This means they are ALWAYS on opposite schedules. When they are awake together they love to "play" together and it is obviously easier on me to feed them both or put them both down vs. trying to put my binky spitter down while feeding her brother. Also, it is hard to go anywhere because someone is always in the middle of a nap or needing to eat.

I don't mind too much because I have a nanny (I work from home) here four days a week but I think as they get older it would be nice to have them on some type of a similair time frame.

We used to start out together but now, as they are starting to sleep through the night, I pretty much have to feed whomever wakes up as soon as they wake up because they are sooo hungry. For example, Jack woke at 5:30 and I fed him a small bottle then hoping he would eat again around 7:15 when is sister usually wakes up. I was assuming he would be up again by then as he usually is up around 6:30 or 7 even if he had a middle of the night meal. Well Lily woke up at 6:30 and I tried to hold her off with her pacifier but she was really very hungry so I brought her down and fed her. Now it is 7:45 and Lily has already gone down for her first nap and Jack is STILL sleeping. I really hate to wake him so I think i will just leave him be and see how the day goes.

Is this what you would have done? Or, should I start trying to move them closer to the same schedule now that they are almost 4mos. If so, how did you do it?

thanks,
Amy

 

I fed them every three hours all day long. We started at 7am then 10, 2, 5 and 7pm. I would shoot for them to stay awake from feeding time for about an hour, 90min at the most. At three months they were still napping in the swings so at the 90min mark, or before if they were looking tired, I'd put them in the swings. They didn't always sleep at the same time until we worked on naps in the cribs just after 4mos. For me, as long as they ate at the same time I was okay. When the twins got on a good two nap a day schedule, my then one year old was taking one nap so I had staggered naps for over a year! Start with feeding them at the same time, even if that means waking someone. That should help you a ton!

 

I also fed them every 3 hours during the day, and that was the only schedule we had until about 5 months, when naps became more regular.

 

I guess the big dilemma then is whether to wake a sleeping baby or not. Some say yes, some say no. I think I am looking forward to the days when they do not have soo many naps a day.

 

Amy - I wake a sleeping baby in the morning to "officially" start the day, and I will wake a napping baby IF they already had a good nap, the other baby is up AND it's time to eat.

I need to try to keep mine on the same schedule or it drives me nuts!! Mine are napping 3x a day right now. AM/PM and late afternoon catnap. I know we aren't always successful, but we sure try. If one of mine is up from a nap too early, I'll put that one in the swing, and they almost always fall back asleep (so much to the point that I'm waking that one when it's time to eat.)

Good Luck - I think we are starting to get to the age where sleep times will become a bit more predictable.

 

At that age, the only schedule I kept to was a feeding one; which was every three hours.
Naps did not get on a consistent schedule until they were able to sleep through the night. So I would be so grateful if they both fell asleep for ANY amount of time in between feedings; otherwise it was all about keeping two babies content!!

 

I never let James sleep more than about 20 minutes longer than Evan. I didn't actually "wake" him but I opened the blind, turned off the white noise machine and loosened his swaddle - he always got the hint. I know it doesn't feel great to wake a sleeping baby, but it was the only way to get mine on track. Now they nap twice a day (6.5 months) and I let them go as long as they want for the afternoon nap.

 

Here are the "rules" I've come up with, through much trial and error. Especially error.

-Always feed at the same time.
-exception: At night, just feed whoever wakes up. (DD usually goes a lot longer than DS at night before needing to eat, so there's no reason to wake her to eat.)
-exception: If anyone needs a snack, that's fine, they can do that individually whenever they want. Especially if one is in a growth spurt and the other isn't!

-Always put down for naps at the same time.
-exception: If the day is totally crazy, like one baby has a doctor's app't and misses a nap and is totally exhausted on coming home, then just meet the urgent needs & forget about being in sync.

-Nap, feed, play, nap.

-If DS wakes from a nap first, just play and keep him busy until DD wakes up, then feed both.

-If DD wakes from a nap first, give DS 30 minutes absolute MAX before waking him up, then wake and feed.

(The last two rules are because DS can tolerate being awake for much longer periods of time than DD. Ivy gets really tired after 1.5 hrs awake, and can be pushed to 2 hrs max. Andrew can stay awake a long time and still be pretty happy. So if he sleeps too long, then he'll have to go down again way too soon after waking up since she'll be tired then. I hate waking a sleeping baby, but life is misery if the naps get out of sync!)


This is what works for us. Most days, the babies nap at the same time. I don't often have to wake them. And they always get hungry at the same time now during the day. Makes everything much, much easier.

Obviously, it's very individualized. So I guess the big questions to ask as you try to get yours in sync are:
-Can they both go about the same length of time between feedings?
-Can they both go about the same length of time awake and happy, or does one get tired and crabby before the other?
-Does one usually take longer naps than the other?

Good luck! It takes a lot of experimenting, but you'll get in the groove soon enough.