How Do I Love Thee? Let Me Count The Ways!

So we all know twins (or kids!) can be hard on a marriage. But I can't be the only one discovering wonderful things about my DH. What positive things has twins done for your relationship? What has he done RIGHT?

I'll start!
I wasn't big on having kids in the first place, but DH wanted some. I married him since we have so much fun together and I thought he might be one of the few people I dated who I might have kids with. I knew he'd be involved.

The twins were the "one last kid" he spent the last four years talking me into.

I love that parenting comes so naturally to him. It is work for me, I have to be intentional about being kind and patient. He has some natural parent bone! He truly delights in our kids and doesn't get stressed about it. The little things don't phase him. He finds it funny when they get mad, and he loves them even more when they get attitudes. That helps me see the humor in it.

I actually look forward to teenagers (4 teenage girls!) because the older they get the more fun we have.

I love my DH!

 

OK I need this post!!! Our marriage has changed so much to due our kiddos and we are still adjusting! We'll make it, but sometimes I need to pause and remember how much I love him!!!

Like your DH, my DH wanted kids so badly, but I needed convincing! He is so hands on, which it is so great! With twins, I think men are forced to be a part of it!

DH used to play the guitar in high school and college. He hasn't played it while I've known him. Well, he has taken it out again and now does "concerts" for the twins!!! It is so cute and I love that he is musical (unlike me!) On that note (pun intended) he also loves to make up songs and sing them about Jacob and Mia, which I love!

The other thing that I love is how he is always talking about how he can't wait to do this or that with the twins when they grow up.

That is all for now, but I'll come back with more.
Melissa

 

My DH and I have been together for 14 years, married for 11 and he's my best friend. After the twins came, I can honestly say he continues to amaze me every single day and every day I fall a little more in love with him. He is a 100% hands on father. He pulls his share of the baby care and then some. It started in the hospital. After my c-section, I was out cold for 12 hours from all the drugs they had to give me (I passed out right after I held the babies!). When I "came to" there was my DH, diapering and feeding babies like he'd been doing it all his life. From the day they came home, he took turns getting up with the babies every night, all night, even though he had to work the next day. He still does this to this day - sometimes if they stir, I don't even hear him get up because he runs in there before I can even wake up!

When I'm sick or just exhausted, he tells me to take a break or go to bed and he does everything by himself. As I have said before, I just make too much money to quit work, so I work all week and he has Fridays off. Every Friday, he has the babies to himself and they have a ball. I always come home to a new group of pictures or video from the days events... he's such a proud daddy!

I have to travel sometimes for my job. These trips are usually about every other month for 3-4 days. The trips are hard on me because I am away from my babies. DH makes a point to call me all day with updates, put the boys on the phone for some babbling, put them on webcam so I can see them, emails me pictures and other things to make me feel connected. During the trips, DH takes care of the babies by himself when he's not working. I've offered to get a night nanny or family help during these trips but he won't have it. He gets insulted and says he does just fine on his own! And he does - he's truly amazing.

He's the most patient man alive and he is completely enamored with our children. We met at 22 years old and have "grown up" together. It might sound cheesy, but we met in college, and sometimes I am so proud of the man he's become! Believe me, I know how lucky I am!!

 

It is really nice to see a post like this even though we all need to vent sometimes
My husband is so incredibly patient and kind with all three kids and me! Even with my PPD and PP tummy he tells me I am beautiful and assures me my emotions are in line (hahahaha! :laughing: )
He took care of EVERYTHING while I was on bedrest without ever complaining and helped nurse me back to health after surgery while working from home, taking care of a toddler and assisting with the twins. :bow2:
We have been together for 14 years and married for 6; and even though we have been together for half our lives, I can say our relationship has grown with the birth of our twins. We have definately discovered things about ourselves with three kids that we never knew before! I also love him more each day. :wub: He thinks I am amazing for having three kids...I think he is amazing for being so supportive through it all!!!

 

I really need this thread right now! I know how great my DH is and how lucky I/we are to have such an involved and supportive daddy/DH. But today, I'm frustrated with him and in a funk. I think listing the good things he does might help me get past my mood. So, lets see...

He totally took over and ran everything without complaint while I was on bedrest.
He does most of the grocery shopping and most of the "taxi driving" for the older kids (his step-kids)
He is completely hands-on daddy! There's nothing that he won't do for the girls. He feeds them, fixes formula, washes bottles, bathes them, dresses them, washes their clothes and blankets and burp rags, changes diapers, takes out the stinky diaper trash ( :blink: ), sings to them, takes their pictures and more!
Every two weeks, I have to work full weekends (Friday - Sunday) so he spends 3 days taking care of the girls alone (sort of, considering sometimes the older kids are home). Last weekend was his first time doing this and it gave him a whole new appreciation for how hard it is for me to get anything else done during the day (especially since I work at home!). And it gave me a whole new appreciation for how great he is with them.
He always says things like "i can't wait until they giggle and cackle" or "i can't wait til I can build them a big two story playhouse". hehe

I have to say that when we met he was a "partier" in a roommate situation with about 5 other guys, driving his van to music festivals, etc...I'm sure you know the type. I fell in love with him despite all that, but didn't know how it could possibly work out for the long term for us. He has made SO MANY changes and sacrifices in his life to be with me and my amazing kids and now his beautiful daughters. He's wonderful and I'm very lucky to have him.

Great thread! ~ Laura

P.S. I was going to post the things he could work on, but this is such a good vibe i decided not to go there right now.

 

Wow-what a great thread! These babies have definately changed our marriage in just the 3 weeks they have been here, and I know it will only continue. Focusing on positives help the situation more than looking at the negatives so here goes!

Mark has been a wonderful father and is very active in everything having to do with the twins. He feeds both of them at all hours of the night (he's back to work and still does it) and doesnt complain(too much) about doing it. He is such a proud papa-is always taking pictures and sending them to everyone we have ever met. He loves to hold and talk to both of the kids as if they completely understand him. He helps with making bottles, will feed both of them and let me sleep, and changes diapers 9and the diaper genie) when they need changing. Even though my body is far from what it was, he tells me my body is ok and not to worry about it. I told him last weekend that fatherhood has done him good and I've seen a new side to him that makes me fall in love with him more every day!

 

Great post! Sometimes the stress can take over and I need to remember all the positives.

My dh took care of everything while I was on bedrest and recovering from the c section. I didn't have to worry about a thing. He never left my side.

My dh is a very patient and loving daddy to his girls. I am so happy that my girls have such a loving father, and they are "daddy's little girls."

When I am tired, my dh will take over. He feeds them, plays with them, bathes them, takes them to the mall, all by himself, and it doesn't even wear him out. He plays songs for them on his guitar. He likes to have a captive audience. :laughing:

I am sick tonight and my dh went out and bought me Nyquil and coke, because I asked him to. He's always doing things like that for me. He never minds.

 

What I love about my DH now is that he is very into the boys and making them happy. He doesn't get as frustrated as I do when they are crying a lot (and they DO!). He also tries to help out with the house work more than he used to as well. It's nice to have the help finally after 8 years together

 

This sounds rather cheesy, but I love everything about my husband, and even more so since we had the twins. He's an *amazing* father and incrediably thoughtful towards me. I think one testament to this is the squeels of pure joy the twins give everytime they see him (which I love to hear).

 

What a great topic. My DH freaked out when we found out we were having twins. Sometimes it made me upset because although I was overwhelmed, I was happy about being pregnant with twins, and I felt like he really didn't want two...then I went into labor at 30 weeks, and he became a different man. He went to the hospital every day after work for the 2 months they were there, so he could feed them and do kangaroo care. He is involved every step of the way - diaper changes, baths, feedings, etc. We joke now that we're glad we had two b/c neither one of us wants to share!

 

This is a wonderful thread!

I love that my husband is so thoughtful. He thinks to make sure enough formula is mixed and fixes bottles so I have them ready for when the twins wake up in the morning. I had surgery also about 9 weeks ago and couldn't lift anything heavier than the babies for 8 weeks, and he never complained about having to pick up the slack. I couldn't sleep laying down either and every night he put pillows up so that I would be comfortable. He does housework. He helps with the babies even when I know he'd rather be watching a ballgame or something.
I know this is something that most men do, but every night before he goes to sleep, he checks all the windows and doors and he checks the stove, does everything he can to make sure we're safe through the night and that's a wonderful feeling.
He deals with all the trash and the dog chores. He takes wonderful care of our 2 year old. He deals with my two oldest kids who can be very challenging at times. He laughs when we all go out together as there are 7 of us, he thinks the looks we get are hysterical. I love that he moved across an ocean to be with me, even though it meant leaving his whole family behind and I know he must get homesick. I love that he takes everything to do with the care of our kids very seriously. It shows me how hard he is trying to do a good job and be a good father. I love that he doesn't mind being goofy to get a laugh out of the kids. I love that he really plays with them and seems to understand them so much better than I do.

He really is a good man, and I love him dearly.

 

I love that this thread was started.... I had such a difficult pregnancy with the twins (well difficult for me compared to my others). He was so reassuring when I worried and when I couldn't move much anymore he never complained about cooking dinner, waiting on me, letting me sleep when I needed, and took care of our oldest DS pretty much by himself. After the twins were born, he was amazing. He made sure that DS1 was taken care of during the day and where she needed to be and then would come up to the hospital and help me. He gets up at night, does night time feedings, feeds them their dinner, bathes them and never complains about anything. He makes sure that I am well rested, and that I have what I need. I am so incredibly lucky to have this man in my life, and we are so blessed to have the life that we have.

He is always quick to tell me how beautiful I am and what a great mommy and wife I am. Our marriage has only gotten better since the kids.

OK I am done bragging. Thanks for starting this thread so I could tell you how wonderful DH is.

Stacie

 

Oh this is an awesome idea -

My dh is a stay at home daddy so that in itself is amazing to me!
While I'm at work he emails me pictures of the goofy things that they are doing so that I don't feel like I'm not a part of things (I still have a certain amount of guilt about not being at home!) He also videos them all of the time.
He is the best daddy - every time that I come home they are on the floor crawling all over him!

 

DH is a great daddy. I'm at school for 12hrs several times a month and he's alone on those days. He does great with them. Not only does he manage to keep them on their schedule, but he also cleans the house! The laundry is done, the dishes are done, the house is vaccuumed and sometimes mopped! And on top of that, they're usually throwing up or sick or something on the days that he has them.

 

My DH is absolutely fantastic. We are both first time parents to our DS & DD and he has been phenomenal. He was never around babies and was afraid but has done fantastic. He gets up in the middle of the night to feed one regardless of the fact he has to go to work and does diaper duty. I am truly thankful for him and he has helped so much and allows me the time to go out and not worry that he is alone with them. I can be gone for the day and know that they are being taken care of by daddy and I have no worries.

 

I love that he didn't think we had ruined our lives (like I did) when the twins were born -- he was able to see it as a very difficult stage that would get better someday. Emotionally he really pulled me through that time. Plus, he learned how to change diapers and feed them while I was still recovering from the c/s, and he taught me how to do everything.

In general, I love that he doesn't stress about things as much as I do. I love that he sings to the girls despite me cringing at his lack of pitch. I love that he gets a kick out of intentionally dressing them in things that don't match. I love that he talks to total strangers about our kids more than I do. I love that he considers it good exercise to put his Ipod on and push the double jog stroller for 2 hours at a time.

 

I love that parenthood just "fits" my DH. He's like a big kid himself and is the first to get down and play with the kids - in fact at family get togethers everybody's kids are climbing all over him and chasing him around. I've realized he has the patience of a saint - and I love him for it!