How do I get them to ask for things?

So, I think I'm just doing too much for them-I get them what they want before they have to ask if that makes sense. Jack know's quite a few words and signs, but when he is hungry he just cries and whines-how can I get him to say or sign "eat" instead?! Sometimes if I ask him if he wants to eat he repeats, but often he just keeps crying. Then when I give him something to eat he devours it-so I know he was hungry. Mackenzie has a bit of a speech delay and is just starting to figure a few things out-very very few...she doesnt know eat or drink or anything like that yet. So I obviously still feel like I just need to cater to her needs before she gets too upset.
They started daycare 1 day a week last week. When we got there Mackenzie was asleep on the floor-apparently she hadnt napped and fell asleep on the rug. She woke up and both kids ran straight to sippies of milk-however, they were normal sippie cups which my kids never learned to drink from-we went straight to straws (I told the lady who was there in the am this) the director brought their cups and we poured the milk into them and Mackenzie drank her whole cup within about a minute, Jack drank all of his too-but slower. When we got home Mackenzie threw up all of her milk-I wonder if she got a bit dehydrated (and stressed)and all of the milk kinda shocked her system or something? I dont know. My point is I just want them to be able to ask for a drink (obviously we need to get the cup thing straightened out, but thats an easy fix).

 

i would just say what you're doing while you're doing it. i usually do something like the following "hey girls! are you ready for breakfast/snack/dinner? it's time to eat. come get in your chairs. we're having sandwiches and grapes. do you like sandwiches & grapes? are you hungry? would you like something to drink? here's your milk" etc, etc, etc. they'll begin to associate those words with those things eventually. that being said, my girls still usually point & grunt at things. on a good day they'll pull on the fridge handle when they want their milk. i just give them the words they aren't/can't say yet & narrate for them. i figure they'll get it in their own time.

 

We do the same as PP. Even so I get a lot more whine from Ethan who doesn't have as many words and a lot more asking from Abby. I just continue to repeat and figure one of these days they will be speaking fluently!

 

oh boy.... our dd really does the grunting and pointing thing too! they both know eat and water and milk, but sometimes they don't ask.

as for the dehydration... I do try to offer ours their sippies every hour or so... sometimes I forget, but I do offer it and say "do you want water"... and do the sign. (the sign is a "W" (3 fingers) at your chin/mouth), mostly the kids just do 1 finger. but they get the idea that they will get their water to drink.

I bet your dd just drank her milk to quick and it upset her... hopefully you get it sorted out. yes, keep working on it.

 

I do like PP - I continuously repeat things like you guys want to eat, let's get in your chairs, do you want some cheese, milk, etc. and they are starting to get it. They will say more, eat, and they have always said milk. I also don't give it to them until they say the word or what they want - if they whine or make the grabbing motion they don't get it but if they say eat or milk,or whatever it is they are trying to get I give them lots of praise and make a big deal about it.

 

I also do the same as Rachel said and narrate what I'm doing/what's going on.

As well as that if they are whining/grunting/pointing, and I know what it's about, I try to make them say or sign what it is they want before giving it to them. So if they're pointing at their cup I'll say "Do you want some water?...Water (emphasise the word and make the sign)..You say water. Water please" and then give it to them. By that time they have normally made an attempt to sign or say the word.

:laughing: I taught Ethan the sign for water and he does only one finger and points it over and over again at the top of his head. I keep trying to get him to do it by his mouth, but he insists on doing it in his hair!

ETA: I also would think that it was how quickly your daughter drank the milk that made her sick.

 

Don't feel bad or think that you're not doing enough! :hug: My guys have a *lot* of words/phrases and they still can't tell me when they're hungry or thirsty! The only way I know is to offer them something and watch them devour it, or I'll notice that they are getting super cranky and realize that's it's been a few hours since their last snack. I was out doing errands this afternoon, and DH had them for lunch, nap and snack. He put them down early, so they got up earlier for snack and ate at 2:30 (which I didn't know). At 5:30 when we went to make dinner they were whining and crying and I couldn't figure out why they were so fussy. By the time we sat down at almost 6:30 DH said "oh yeah it's been almost 4 hours since they ate last". Never once did they say or sign "eat".

My SOP is to offer them food/milk every 2-3 hours, with sippies of water/juice in between, then narrate what they're having. My guys can say just about any words for food that we eat regularly, but it's very rare that they actually ask for them, and they never are able to choose between them when offered.

Don't beat yourself up! Asking for what they want will come later; just try to anticipate their needs and keep up the good work modeling talking and signing! :good:

 

too funny! I love how kids do signs just a little differently and can still get their message across if we are paying attention.

 

I agree with the others, just keep modeling what you want. I constantly signed "please" and "more" to my girls, they eventually got it, but it took a while.

 

I did (and still do) the same as Rachel, I narrate my day, what I am doing, tell them what's being offered for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I keep a sippy of water out for them during the day, so they have access to it and they get their sippies of milk in the evening & morning. I think mine learned to ask what they want because they figured out what the schedule was during the day...they got to the point where they'll ask to eat and ask for their milk (I would say that this started to happen between 18-22 months).