How did you teach "clean up" @ 18m?

The boys had their first toddler time playgroup today.

At the end of the playgroup, everyone helps to clean up the toys...my boys (who were not the youngest ones) were the ONLY ones who didn't help clean up.

Are they clueless or stubborn? How do I get them to "get it"? We tried again at bedtime and it didn't go well. I was putting things into the baskets...they were flinging them out and getting frustrated (as was I).

Tips for quick learning?

 

I know Sean learned by me making him get down with me even if he didn't do anything but put one toy away, the tv went off, he was made to at least sit by me and this happened every single time we cleaned up, I started singing the clean up song and that helped him think of it as fun too.
He then started to clean up as asked after that.
With Josh he sees us cleaning up and we have certain totes, baskets etc for certain toys and he has learned and he jumps in and helps.
I rewarded both of them with cheers, claps, yays, and verbal praise.
It can be done it just has to be consistent.
I know when Josh wants to get things back out I grab his hand and say no no we are cleaning right now, no playing and tell him 'put it away' and then he knows I am serious and there is to be none of it.

 

Mine were very helpful at 18 months and regressed around 2. What works best for us is choices, do you want to pick up the blocks or books? If they are in the zone, I give very specific instructions such as show me where the X goes or where is Y going to take a nap while you eat lunch.

 

i used a few simple techniques..

sound..

CCCC cups in the kitchen.. has the c sound
TTT toys in the toy box.. has the t sound..

and i would tell them its time to shoot..

they pick up their own clothes and run them to the washer

tell them yea!! when they come out of any room..

basically i get a basket and get them to get all their toys in the basket.. then put the basket in their room..

atleast my living room is clean

 

I sing the clean up song. "Clean up, clean up, everybody clean up" as I throw toys in the toy box. They get excited and love to help mommy......most of the time.

 

QUOTE(lilymadison @ Sep 19 2007, 09:41 AM) [snapback]414220[/snapback]
I sing the clean up song. "Clean up, clean up, everybody clean up" as I throw toys in the toy box. They get excited and love to help mommy......most of the time.

That song drives me crazy - but it's what worked for us. My one year olds don't help yet, but they are starting to get into it a tiny little bit.

 

Mine are very into singing songs right now. So, we sing and make it a game to pick up "Here's how we pick up our toys, pick up our toys, pick up our toys, here's how we pick up our toys to get ready for bath time..." I wouldn't want to have to do this in front of a group but it works for us. It's also all about praise. Any little thing they pick up and put away results in crazy amounts of hoopla. And, I use it as a way to practice following directions. I'll say something specific like, "Will you help Mommy, please? Here's the fish platter. Do you remember where it goes? Can you put it away?" and they'll be so proud to get it right and they do love to "help Mommy".

I have to tell you, though, that they didn't get it right very often at the beginning but getting something into a cabinet was still praised even if it wasn't the right cabinet. They had the idea, at least. They remember more now.

 

Thanks for posting this. I really need to work on this too. :blush: I have tried to show them and help them put the toys in the bins. Maybe I'll have to sing the clean up song too (not a big Barney fan).

 

I am convinced my girls are becoming clones of their father. When they were 18 months old they would respond to the "clean up" song & help pick up toys. When they were 2 they would play games "who can put all the blue blocks in the basket?" or "who can put all the dolls in the doll cabinet the fastest?". Now that they are 3 when I try to get them to help, they look at me & say "That's your job, mommy. I'm busy." They also went from neat, tidy little princesses to twin tornadoes who empty out every single toy box & shelf, make "trains" out of all the chairs, bins, stepstools, etc, & turn every bin upside down on the floor & walk away & leave it there. I have now progressed to "if the Bob the Builders are not in the basket by the time I finish singing the song, they will be put away & you will not be able to play with them for a long time."

I have set a poor example by rushing to do everything myself. I am going to be more consistent & insistent on the girls helping. It is not good for them to think picking up their toys is my "job". I am looking forward to any new ideas.

 

We've been attempting to teach them this and I definitely sing the clean up song until I am blue in the face, but so far no good luck. We'll keep trying though.

 

We don't watch Barney at our house but I heard the song from someone else and thats how it started. I later heard it was a Barney song.

 

Their daycare provider has always sung the Barney "Clean Up" song for them (I didn't realize it was from Barney until much later, either!) and she is very structured about cleaning up whatever they've gotten out before transitioning to the new activity, so I have had some good reinforcement on that front. Also around 18mos we started doing a weekly music class where the instructor sings a different "Clean Up" song, and we started singing that one at home.

For the longest time I would just clean up their toys after they went to bed or after they went down for a nap, so our clean-up time was sort of sporadic, like I would just have them help put away the blocks before we moved on to something else. Around 2yo I started being sure to make cleaning up part of the before-bed routine because I didn't want them to think the toys all magically went away every night, LOL! At first my husband would just sit on the couch while we cleaned up, but I told him that if he wasn't going to help clean up then he had to spend that time in a different room because I didn't want the girls to think it was Mommy's job to clean up and Daddy's job to sit on his *ss. So now we all get down on the floor and help clean up.

Like some others, the girls were really helpful starting around 18mos but regressed a lot sometime after 2yo. One thing I find that works well is to give them very specific tasks -- "Rita, please take the spatula and the coffeepot back to the (play) kitchen. Natalie, please put this book back on the shelf." Etc. I still do most of the real work and they still get very easily distracted, but I think it's important to try to keep them involved. I have also started trying to enforce that THEY have to help me clean up whatever they've gotten out before transitioning to the next thing (rather than me just cleaning it up once they've moved on to whatever). I won't get out XYZ until they've at least made a show of participating in clearning away whatever they had out before.

Also starting around 2 months ago I have been having them help clear their dirty dishes after meals and put them in the dishwasher. They can even scape their plates into the trash! This takes much longer than if I just did it myself, but they LOVE helping with this and again, I think it's very important to involve them and try to just make this part of their everyday routine. I was the baby of the family and my parents and older siblings always did everything for me, and I really struggled (and still do) with day-to-day straightening, cleaning, home maintenance, so I very much want to give them a good foundation in participating in keeping the home presentable and comfortable.

 

I used to sing the Barney clean up song and would get down on the floor and help them at that age. I would pick up the majority of the toys but point out a toy and say Katelyn- please go get that doll and lets put it in the basket, etc... sometimes they would pick up a lot of toys and sometimes only a few but eventually they "get it."

 

Glad to know I haven't turned them into spoiled brats by waiting too long to introduce this milestone. I also do most of the clean up after they're down for nap/bed. It's just faster that way. I don't mind being consistent and having it take longer ...we'll just have to build it into the before bed routine.

Also, thanks for the heads up to expect a decline around 2yo. Bettie: thanks for the tip about Dad helping or leaving.

The song is a great idea, but I have a "no Barney" policy in my house, so we'll have to make up our own version.

 

Positive feedback. My girls really, really respond to praise. saying things like "good job", clapping, hugs, kisses, etc. I can get them to help with lots of things (they like to help me unload the dishwasher - safe objects only). They love to please us. And then they are so proud and happy.

 

I just want to say that I am also not a Barney fan and didn't realize that the song they were singing was from Barney, but it's hard to argue when they happily sing "Clean up, clean up, everybody doooooooooo share!" We are just as likely to sing the song their music tacher sings when it's time to put away the big toys -- it's pretty simple and just goes "Clean up time, clean up time, time to stop and end our play. Clean up time, clean up time, time to put our toys away!" and the girls LOVE singing that one. Maybe you can try that one instead of the Barney one.

 

Good advice so far! One additional thing, make sure you are very clear about the task and make sure it is doable for them and easy to understand. Instead of "clean up", assign specific tasks to each child. Eg. I would say "Nicole, I want you to find all the balls and put them in this box", Jamie please pick up your blanket and put it back on your bed. Stand over them and guide them and help them (at the beginning this is often more work than cleaning up yourself, but it will pay off). Be consistent and make them clean up every time they are finished playing and you should have little cleaners on your hands in no time.

 

Barney Clean up song here too- sometimes works, sometimes not.
But I am consistent- when there is a mess, I try to get them to help and cheer them on.

 

Ack! I didn't know the Clean Up song was from Barney! They sing it at the library and at Gymboree.
I also ditto giving them very specific instructions like "Put this car in the box" Even if they do things one at a time, they will start to get the idea. Just giving the general instruction of "clean up" produces blank stares.
I also started guilting DH into helping.

 

Siri! This is a well timed thread!! I realize that I need to get serious about making them start cleaning up before we move onto something else as well!! Thanks for starting this! It's helping me to be motivated in that front!!

(I don't think I was because my "style" isn't super pick up immediately after the fact either....do I need this for ME too!!)

 

I too had no idea it was from Barney. I heard my MIL sing it awhile ago and it has stuck. I'm also teaching them to "clean" their high chair trays. I wipe of most of the food, give them a damp cloth, sing the song, and they wipe away. They love it for some reason and I get a kick out of it.

 

dh and I just tried something new the other night. we used a big plastic box and had the girls go around the whole down stairs to help us pick up toys. We showed them what we wanted, said what they should do (put the toy in the box) and praised them and gave them high fives from time to time when they put a toy in the box. Of course, once in a while they would try to take a toy out and we just had to keep saying no, clean up time. no play! For now, I don't mind putting the toys in their "proper" place but I hate going around the whole down stairs to clean all the toys. It's a lot on my back to bend up and down up and down (I know, don't bend at the back, bend at the knees!) A little later when they understand a little bit more then I will have them help me organize the toys as to where they actually go (books go here, instruments go here, stuffed animals here and so on.) I figure this is a good beginning and will be a little less clean up for me and dh. Of course we have only done it once because my dd has been sick lately but I hope to make it a routine. Perhaps I can pick a cd song to play while we do it so that when they hear the song they automatically know play time is over, time to clean up.