Hi My name is Marie and My 3-Year-Olds Have No Interest In the Potty

What do I do? They still at 3+ have no interest in the potty and I know better than to hold them there. Or what?

I've resorted to bribery. I figure I'm getting them a swing set thing sometime this coming year wnyway so I've told them when they start using the potty regularly they'll get one. Hasn't helped a whit!

I guess I need a book or something. I just sort of hoped this would happen. Now that they are starting preschool I'm waiting a couple weeks, and we have the new au pair another adjustment, but I'm getting SERIOUS later this month. Just tell me, what does "getting serious" mean?

HELP! I'm clueless.

Also remember I'm a working mom, and I'm sure that's made it tougher.

We've had the potties since about 18 months, Melissa peed a few times early then lost interest. Jade sat on the big potty with insert for a while the other day but nothing came out (but it was the first time she was willing to even sit for any duration so I count it as progress.)

 

Marie, I feel for you. My sister just finished training her 3 year old. He was 3 in May and not really showing any interest. Then they went to Disney in June (so she held off, for her convenience ). So they came down to the Cape while we were on vacation and he tried it a couple of times there. He was told he couldn't go to pre-school without knowing how to use the potty (her school's rule). They came home from the Cape and he was trained within the week. After a couple of dry nights, he asked if he could go to school.
I have no advice for you (we are still in the testing it phase....Meghan will go, Nolan won't), just wanted to let you know that once it happened for my sister's 3 year old, it happened pretty quickly.

 

Marie...please forgive me because I can't remember...doesn't one of your girls have sensory issues? Our OT told us not to expect Camden to train quickly because of his sensory issues. It's soooo frustrating because, at 3 1/2, I'm READY for him to be out of diapers!

 

I have no good advice, but good luck. My girls go to daycare since I work, too, and they were a huge help with Maggie and PT.

Oh - but what about that bribery? We did something immdeiate each time - Maggie loves M&M's, but she never got any - except for when she went potty. 1 for #1, 2 for #2, and she got one for trying if we had to have her try when we were going out somewhere. She still thinks M&M's are only for potty treats.

 

I feel your pain. My two had absolutely no interest especially my dd. I've been trying off and on since they were 2.5 years old and no interest at all. In July I finally had it and decided to try it with sicker/sticker chart and put them both in underwear. That was a disaster. My dd ran around with wet pee/poo underwear and did not care at all. My ds was better at going pee in the potty but we had to take him. So after 3 days of that I backed off and decided to wait a couple of weeks. I tried again with m&m's and my dd got smart and would pee a little get a m&m and run back and pee a little more up to 5 times. But she also wanted her diapers and not underwear. So I backed down for another week and a half and came back with new sticker charts and only m&m's for #2's in the potty. I was getting desperate as dd was going to start preschool and had to be completely potty trained. I picked the first weekend in August and stayed home with the two of them. I also work during the week so pt has been really difficult to find time for.

We woke up Saturday and I told them that they are big kids now and we are going to wear underwear. My dd wanted her brother's cars underwear and I didn't care, whatever got her excited. I explain the sticker chart and when the filled the card they could pick a special toy out of the basket (coupon for a trip to get ice cream, some small toys from disney store and new cars) and if they did #2 in the potty they get m&m's. My dd had 2 accidents that morning and on Sunday 1 accident and on Monday 2 accidents (grandpa was watching her and didn't ask her often enough) and by Tuesday no accidents at all. She actually surprised me as she was so so stubborn. It's been a month and she has only had 1 accident and started preschool this week and has been accident free. My ds is a whole other story as he does not initiate and we have to take him every 1-1.5 hours and sometimes it's a fight so we may be pulling him in pull ups for a bit but we are trying to keep him in underwear for awhile longer but 2-3 accidents a day and #2's in his underwear is absolutely no fun to clean. We just haven't found anything that will motivate him as he is way too busy playing to be bothered.

Whenever they used the potty we gave them a ton of praise, high 5s and made a huge deal about filling the boxes on the sticker chart. I must say for us pt was way more work then taking care of infant twins. It also didn't help that we have carpet at our house so my dh was very upset whenever the accidents happen on the couch and all over the carpet so we ended up buying a carpet steam cleaner to clean up the accidents...sigh.. But one thing I learn is that they will get it when they are ready and no matter how much I wanted it to happen if they aren't ready they will just not do it so you have to give it a try, take a break, and try again it'll happen eventually.

 

QUOTE(Babytimes2 @ Sep 5 2007, 08:12 PM) [snapback]394482[/snapback]
Marie...please forgive me because I can't remember...doesn't one of your girls have sensory issues? Our OT told us not to expect Camden to train quickly because of his sensory issues. It's soooo frustrating because, at 3 1/2, I'm READY for him to be out of diapers!


They BOTH have sensory issues! I would think it would make them want the wet diaper OFF, though!
But yes, I guess it could be related...

 

turn them on the big potty backwords..

it spreads their little legs and lets them watch what they are doing..

it worked for all three of mine..

they arent trained but they love the potty..

 

QUOTE(marieber @ Sep 6 2007, 10:16 AM) [snapback]395242[/snapback]
They BOTH have sensory issues! I would think it would make them want the wet diaper OFF, though!
But yes, I guess it could be related...

Marie...from what I have found (through talking with our OT and through my own research) is that they just don't feel the urge to go to the bathroom. That may be the case with Melissa and Jade.

 

Another issue we have here is chronic (i.e. since birth) constipation. I've got it under reasonable control because they LOVE prunes, but they still have pretty hard stools. They do feel them coming and Melissa in particular asks me to leave the room if I enter while she's pooping, but I can't get them to sit on the potty.

Maybe I have to stop asking and start telling, though.

I'm hoping some of the peer pressure in preschool might help.

We went to parent orientation night last night, and apparently fewer than half of the children in the class are potty trained.

Oh, and there's another set of twins in the class of 18 children. Boys. Also August 2004 babies too, and with a nice mommy.

 

I would not worry too much, my twins were about 2 months before thier fourth birthday when they started showing the ability to hold it. For 2 years, we begged pleaded, bribed, scolding, rushed to the bathroom, the whole gammit. We finally told them that they were not going to get to go to preschool and left it alone. They were to be in pull ups for eternity!! About three weeks later, Ethan picks up a pair of Superman underwear and asks if he can wear THESE(super cool undies) to school. I said that he could if he was not going to pee or poo in them and DING DONG... He was potty trained. :banana: All that work and crying, I just had to wait for them to grow into it. Eric followed within 2 days. Don't give up hope, potty training is a developmental skill not a discipline issue. When your girls overcome thier development hump, they will potty train.

The same was true for my son, except he potty trained at 2 yrs old. We started working with him at 1.5 because he showed interest. BTW ~The twins never showed any interest. He quickly revolted and we got so frustrated that we gave up. About a week after his 2 year b-day he just got up and started going by himself. The doctor always felt like his very early potty training was because Sam's fine motor skills were off the chart and his speech was amazing for his age. He has done almost every milestone way ahead, even puberty! UGH! It has everything to do with physical and emotional milestones. They will get there!

 

Gotta love potty training. I encountered two very different children to train in my boys. Ben basically self trained himself at 34 months. After using the potty chair here and there from age 2, he just started going all the time on it. He pee (day and night)trained seemingly overnight. It did, however, take him a couple months to master #2. He then quickly did his bathroom duties by himself from start to finish (pulling up clothes and handwashing). I thought to myself..."wow this potty training isn't that bad."

Then comes Luke! Despite seeing his brother constantly using the potty, Luke wanted no parts of it. I kept saying to myself..."you have to wait until he's ready".

Well in early June (age 3.5yrs), I started getting nervous about preschool. Our school mandated potty training. After much bribery,etc...nothing was working. I read on TS about a success using a video called "Potty Power". I bought it on Amazon.com Luke really took to it. He watched it repeatedly and even learned the words to the songs. Wouldn't you know, he started regularly going on the potty!!! I switched him to underpants immediatetly. Pull ups were not good with him unlike his brother who never peeing in them. I also coupled that with daily "pretend" calls to his preschool teacher (my mother or sister would fill the role) to give her an update. Thank goodness..it worked out and within several weeks he was fully trained.

Good Luck Marie...I assure you...it does finally click!! It's seems to be a combination of timing and finding their hot button.

 

I just ordered "Potty Power." By the way, they've been watching "Elmo's Potty Time" for about a year and they really like it, but it didn't help. Maybe this one will. This Saturday I plan on really getting down to business. Wish me luck!!!!

 

Let me know about Potty Power!

 

Good luck this weekend. We have Potty Power and though it hasn't helped my ds to be completely trained I think it helped my dd to see kids actually sit on the potty. There is the section about big kids and baby and she wanted to be a big kid. The songs are really catchy also.

 

Well, Jade has now peed twice on the potty. She's so cute, "I did it." :clapping:

Melissa, still no interest and I'm not going to push her. I'm just going to work on Jade. But it's hard to be consistent with life in the way all the time.

We got "Potty Power" -- I'm underwhelmed. Although they like the songs.