Here's a fun behavior issue

One of my twins is a picky eater. A few months ago my husband was TDY for awhile, and a couple nights a week I got in the habit of taking the twins to their martial arts class, prepping a dinner while they were gone, then feeding them as soon as they got home (usually about 6:45-7) and giving the baby his bath while they ate. A few weeks into this routine I found out that when I made something the picky one didn't like, he would wait until I was in the bathroom with the baby, then throw away his food in the trash can, cover it up so I wouldn't see it and go about his way. He got caught and punished.

This morning I'm in the bathroom getting dressed when I hear my husband yelling "Why is there chicken in the bathroom?" I thought to myself there's no way I just heard that, he must have said something else and I didn't hear him right. When I come out, sure enough there was chicken from last nights dinner in the bathroom, all over the floor. Nicholas confessed that he hid it behind his back, pretended he had to use the bathroom and threw it out in the bathroom trash. Our cat got into it in the middle of the night, revealing the evidence.

So we've sent him to his room for the day, no TV/video games, etc. Any thoughts on how to handle this??

 

Hiding food he doesn't want to eat is a very common behavior. I remember getting spanked as a child for hiding my mother's hideous cooking in my napkin (beef tongue in raisin sauce - REALLY). In the end, if he doesn't like the food I think it's cruel to try to force him to eat it. You can tell him to take it or leave it but making him sit and stare at a plate of food that he hates just won't work.

This is just my opinion and I understand how frustrating it is when you know he should be hungry but he won't eat. That's a whole different topic, but some of the suggestions are to have him help you cook the meals as well as taking him grocery shopping and allowing him to make some of the little decisions on what to serve. That allows him a little bit more control over the situation.

 

I would also not force him to eat food he doesn't like. Put food on his plate. He eats it or not. That's up to him. I also like the ideas of including him in food preparation and selection to try to help him get out of his pickiness in a more positive way.

I just can't imagine being forced to eat the foods I don't like. I hate mayonnaise. Just the smell makes me want to throw up. I'd consider it akin to torture to be forced to eat it, even though I'm not picky at all and can generally eat anything.

 

This isn't a case of me forcing him to eat something he doesn't like. This is him being picky because the chicken touched a mushroom and he doesn't like mushrooms. It's also stuff that I've made before and he's eaten before. The things he legitimately doesn't like, like mushrooms, I do not force him to eat. When it was happening before, it was usually because he wanted to stop at a fast food place after their class and then was disappointed when I told him no, so he refused to eat what I had made, whether he actually liked it or not.

I also remember my parents forcing me to eat what I didn't like, mine was pea soup :bad:, so I don't do that to my kids. I tell them to take it or leave it, but if they don't eat they are to get ready for bed and have to read or play quietly in their room until bedtime. I know my kids, I know when I'm forcing them to eat something they don't actually like and something they are just being finicky about.

 

What are the consequences for lying? I would treat it as lying and being wasteful. Good luck!

 

It's odd that he feels the need to lie about it then. If he could just leave the table. Maybe have a conversation with him about why he's making the choice he's making and other choices he could make instead. Does he feel like he's disappointing you if he doesn't eat?

 

Maybe he thinks the path to a quicker exit from the table is an empty plate? So then it would be "you don't have to eat it, but you have to stay seated with us until everybody is excused."

I have no idea how to discipline that, though. I mean, it's pretty creative!

We have a rule that food (meal food) can't leave the table. If we aren't sitting with them, though, they are constantly trying to sneak it to the main living area or the little table or to wherever they were playing before the meal. As a result, we have to sit with them even during breakfast and lunch. Playing > eating, sleeping, anything.