Help! What To Do About Biting?

When Kate gets really mad, usually b/c Charlie is stealing a toy, she will bite him! She has even tried to bite the dog when the dog took a piece of food out of her hand (it was so funny seeing her go after the dog)! How do I handle this? She has left marks on Charlie a couple of times. I usually tell her, "No, we don't bite. that is not nice" and console Charlie. I don't know what else to do. I don't want to condone Charlie for stealing Kate's toy, but when she bites him, it hurts him. I feel bad just letting him cry.
Any suggestions?

 

My babes don't bite (I hope I didn't curse myself there), but one time when this topic came up a while ago, someone posted that they would squeeze lemon in the biters mouth. I thought if I found myself with a biter, I would try that.

 

I've never done this personally (my kids haven't started biting yet) but alot of people say to bite them back......not too hard....to show them that it hurts ......most kids don't realize its painful.

 

Unfortunately biting is a normal phase for the age your twins are at!! They are feeling all sorts of emotions, (like anger when a toy is taken away) and simply do not have the language skills yet to express how they are feeling, nor are they able to understand the concept of "sharing".

If you keep that very important fact in mind, it may help in dealing with this!!! (without biting them back please!!~~~I have read just about every resource available in books and online about this topic, and that is never recommended as a way to address it.)

Often with mine, I know the situations that can trigger frustration and I will intervene before it can happen (like Ryan loves to tackle his brother, who does not like it at all, and after squirming and yelling ~while Ryan is laughing cause it's all fun to him~ Colin gets frustrated and tries to bite).

If I am not able to intervene prior to a stressful situation, and a bite occurs, I promptly and quickly tell the biter that biting is bad behavior and comfort the bitten. Once he is ok, then I tell the biter that it's wrong to bite, that it hurts, and then I tell him that he bit because he was mad/frustrated/angry etc...and give him another way to express himself. Being consistent in your response is important too.

This is such a tough stage to deal with, and the only thing that helps me is to remember that it is my responsibility to teach my guys appropriate ways to handle stress and frustration until they have the words to do so themselves.

 

The PP had given you all the suggestions. I posted this situation few months back.

My DS was very bad at biting and often left marks on DD. I was very consistent and followed most of the suggestions given by the above PP. Tried doing the redirection even before the biting occurs. At one stage I was tired of redirection and being consistent. But gradually it paved off. DS still bites but the frequency is much much lesser.

DD was so tired of being bitten that from the last one month she took over the role of biting. I think now DS understands that biting hurts.

Its a difficult stage but it will definitely be over soon.

 

Ok maybe this is not the most popular answer but when my son tried to bite me I bit him back. He NEVER bit anyone again. I had tried all the other options and he would bite kids at daycare. Then one day he tried to bite and that was the end of it. I think the key is to catch them in the act.

 

I just saw our pediatrician last week and he told me to do time out .. I have been putting them in their crib, but he said no you don't want them to associate time out with where they sleep,(lots of children develop sleep problems at their age) he suggested getting a chair or something else for time out. He also said if that doesn't work then there are other things we could discuss like putting a squirt of lemon or vinegar in their mouth every time they bite.

Give your pedi a call and see what he says would work for you

 

Ok just had to add a funny story. My cousin a gazillion years ago was biting. He was about the same age BUT he was very gifted. I mean really smart. At 18 months he was talking like a much older child. He graduated from Harvard a few years ago. So he completely understood what my aunt was doing to him. My ds at the same age would not understand what she did. Anyway my aunt told him if he bit anyone anymore she was going to pull his teeth out. Well he bit again. So she said ok lets go. She took him down into the basement and set him on the table. She grabbed a pair of plyers and said open up. Well of course he was mortified and never opened up. Of course she never would have done it but it worked lol! He never bit again.

 

well i guess you cant blame it on teething at their age right? my twins havent gone through the biting stage yet, mummy cant wait for it.

the only way i can think of to bite them back. i dont think i could ever bring myself to bite my own child, but i have heard that people do it and it works...

 

Ditto not biting them back. How can you tell them not too bite when you bite them? Its like telling them no hitting then YOU spank them

Consistency about reprimanding the biter will work eventually. It is a phase that my boys went through too. I would firmly tell Josh no biting and console Zach. I too would intervene if I knew they were getting to frustration of biting stage.

HTH B)