He does not want to come home from preschool

This has been going on for about 3 weeks now. My boys have been in preschool for over a year now so school is nothing new to them. They are in seperate classrooms and go 4 days a week, 2 1/2 hours a day.

My one DS gets sent home with a daily report that gets filled out by his teacher and it says how he felt, who and what he played with and any other activities.

The problem is he's having too much fun in school and when it's time to leave, he has a full blown meltdown. Pretty much every day for the past 3 weeks I get to hear "I don't want Mommy, I want to stay at school". Getting him in the car is a struggle, getting him in the house is a struggle.

Today it went on for over an hour once we got home and I'm at a loss as to what to do.

It does not matter what I say: "when we get home, we'll play in the yard" or "we can watch a movie". It does not matter, he wants to stay at school.

I've told his teachers that I should video tape this so in ten years from now when I can't get him to go to school I can prove to him at one point he loved it so much, he would scream and cry. :rolleyes

And it's not just me. On Wednesday's my BF is off from work and will come with. He loves seeing him, but not at school. We get the same "I want to stay at school".

Any ideas on how to handle this.

It's getting really old.

 

Could you have the teachers help ease the transition with warnings? Something like "We're going to have a snack and then Mommy is going to pick you up to go home. What are you going to do with mommy later? Maybe you can go to the park!" And then during snack: "What's going to happen after snack? That's right, Mama is coming to take you home!" And the same thing during clean up. Ask the teachers to "talk up" going home and how much fun whatever your afternoon activity will be.

Sometimes transitions can be the toughest part - it may seem silly, but going over the whole day before you leave could help too. "Today is a school day! You'll get to play with Miss Emily and have a snack and then I'll come pick you up! And then we will go to the grocery store and then play with trucks." Quiz him on the routine after awhile.

Also, maybe a sticker chart - give him a job during pick up (maybe carrying his snack box to the car/holding your hand walking to the car, etc) and everytime he does the job and has a good pick up he gets a sticker and x number of stickers = a prize?

 

I don't know how old your son is but my older DD did this around 3-4 years old. Honestly nothing I tried worked, even getting the teachers to do the transition, sticker charts etc, nothing. Eventually she moved to big school and grew out of it. I wish I had some advice for you because i remember how it hurt me sometimes that she didn't want to come home with boring old Mummy and other days when we were in a rush or I had a long day at work, how frustrated I felt. I eventually kept her home for 3 months before she started big school.

 

Well, let's see the bright side... it should be over soon no? Or is it a around the year thing?

 

I'm glad I'm not the only one. I really don't think those things would work with my DS either. They turned 4 in January.

He will be going to summer school starting June 11th, but his brother won't so that should make for some more fun times. :faint:

Maybe not seeing his brother at school will make him want to come home to us.

 

My advice is stick to your guns. IMHO, I think these things are not so much about kids not wanting to leave school (or not wanting to go home) but more about your reaction if they tell you they want to stay. I keep it consistent, so that they know when I show up, it means we're leaving.

I usually say something along the lines of "I am glad you had so much fun today! Did you have (music, art, pizza) today? I missed you very much, and I can't wait until we go home and do XXXX. And you know, you'll be back to school tomorrow. Now, do you want to put on your jacket or do you want me to do it?"

Some things I noticed that some of the other parents do it is they tend to play with their children for 5 or 10 minutes before leaving.

GL! And as a PP said, I think it is a phase that they will outgrow.