Hard to deal with Twins

I am a mother of 7 year old twins and an 8 year old boy. Ever since my girls were first born I have had trouble with them. When they are at school or a friends house their teachers and friends parents always tell me that they are so polite and behave but when they are home, they lie, refuse to do any chores and fight a lot with their brother. They are also very destructive. They break everything...furniture, toys, and anything else they can get their hands on. It gets so bad at home that I just have to leave the room and cry. I feel like I am at my wits end. Does anyone have any suggestions???

 

We have found James Lehman's Total Transformation Program helpful.
http://www.thetotaltransformation.com/?dsource=googlebcntl&gclid=CPuR8qHA-p4CFSBJagodNTf-Tg
It's geared toward slightly older children but the message is still the same no matter the age. It's a lot about consequences and making the child responsible for their own actions. Basically these are the house rules, you break them and this is the clear and defined consequence. It's about gaining back the respect you as a parent deserve. Check it out if you get a chance. Feel free to PM me!

 

I read about that program online. It is too expensive for me. Sounds good though

 

Have you heard of a book called "Kazdin Method for Parenting the Defiant Child"? It's definitely worth a read. Here is a link to some descriptions and reviews of the book.

http://www.amazon.com/Kazdin-Method-Parenting-Defiant-Child/dp/0618773673

 

OMG can I relate. Mine aren't destructive, however. Just 5 yr old drama queens. I have no suggestions as I am at wit's end too.