Graduating to this board

My girls are one today. I can't believe it has been a year!

I do have a question since we made it here What do you do about the fighting between one year olds? I have three older children and never had to deal with this because there was never anyone to fight with at the same age. I could easily tell the older child to stop, etc.

Micky is the one who usually starts it. She is always taking everything away from Maddy. Right now it is kind of funny to watch them fight. But that isn't an impression I want them to keep that we think it is funny. KWIM?

Thanks!

 

I know exactly what you mean about thinking it's funny at first. Bridger always used to take toys from Porter, and I remember we actually cheered and clapped for Porter the first time he stole something back! Then we looked at each other and thought, hmmm, maybe that wasn't the best reaction. ardon:

At this point, we actually still just let them sort it out themselves most of the time, and they are getting good at doing it. If one steals a toy, the other either takes it back or lets it go and finds something else. Usually that's good enough, and the one who stole it moves on and finds something else to play with. Often, they'll work out a trade, without any of our intervention. One will steal what the other has, but then give him something else instead. Usually that makes them both happy (and it's very cute).

If the one who steals the toy simply won't give it back, and the boy who originally had it still wants it, then we tell the stealer that the other boy was playing with it, and that he needs to give it back and wait for his turn. We then offer the stealer a different toy to play with, and help him (i.e., pry it out of his hands and back to his brother) give the first toy back.

If they are both fighting over the same thing, and it's not clear that one of them was intently playing with it first, but they can't reach an agreement between themselves, we just take that toy out of the picture and give them each something else to play with. They might fuss for a minute, but they move on very quickly.

We've never needed to do anything more than this right now, and actually virtually all of the time, they work it out themselves and we let them.

 

I struggle with this also. I thought I would just let them figure things out but one is so much more physically advanced that I can't. And she is a terrible hair puller! Her standing and walking while the other crawls and sits just puts her hands at hair level. I don't think there is any answer but I do get excited when I see my baby steal something or get a handful of hair.

 

:birthday: girls

At that age I just said "no hitting Trevor, that's not nice" or "don't take the toy away from Emilie". It's hard because they don't comprehend a lot at that age, but I felt I had to tell them something. :lol:

 

[SIZE=10pt]Happy Birthday girls!! and :sign0016:

We're going through the same thing right now. We have been letting them work it out between them most of the time. There have been a few instances where DS gets a little physical and we say "no" and then move him away from the situation. It seems like they go through stages of being the 'bully' though <_<

One of the many things I didn't think about when I found out I was having twins It is cute at times though

April [/SIZE]

 

[SIZE=14pt]:Clap: Happy Birthday Micky and Maddy!! :Clap:[/SIZE]

Welcome Momma to the 1-4 forum! :wavey:

At that age for the fighting, I didn't feel there was much I could do. ardon: I would say things like "no hitting, it's not nice" and "we share toys", etc. but not much more that I thought I could do.

 

welcome and congrats on surviving the 1st year!