going it alone

for moms that have been handling twins on their own (I know there are a bunch) - what are some tips? When they both start screaming and I can't hold both of them, it's miserable.

I've read the lessons learned thread (def. some good advice) - but at the 3 week mark, I can't seem to get them on any schedule - they eat roughly every 3 hours, but sometimes they eat for 20 minutes, sometimes an hour and a half. Sometimes they go down, sometimes they don't. Also, I'm doing a combo of bf, pumping and formula. I know I should pick one and stick to it - but:
1) I can't seem to get my supply up 100% (yes, I know I should pump every 2 hours, but it's just impossible)
2) BF them exclusively takes too long (although I have had two semi-successful tandem sessions) and they don't "appear to get anough"
3) I think the formula smells a little nasty, which is why I don't want to do it exclusively.

My husband is home, but he needs to work, so I'm trying to juggle the two mostly on my own.

...help!!

 

for moms that have been handling twins on their own (I know there are a bunch) - what are some tips? When they both start screaming and I can't hold both of them, it's miserable.

I've read the lessons learned thread (def. some good advice) - but at the 3 week mark, I can't seem to get them on any schedule - they eat roughly every 3 hours, but sometimes they eat for 20 minutes, sometimes an hour and a half. Sometimes they go down, sometimes they don't. Also, I'm doing a combo of bf, pumping and formula. I know I should pick one and stick to it - but:
1) I can't seem to get my supply up 100% (yes, I know I should pump every 2 hours, but it's just impossible)
2) BF them exclusively takes too long (although I have had two semi-successful tandem sessions) and they don't "appear to get anough"
3) I think the formula smells a little nasty, which is why I don't want to do it exclusively.

My husband is home, but he needs to work, so I'm trying to juggle the two mostly on my own.

...help!!

 

I don't have any advice. I just wanted to say I'm in the same boat as you. I'm curious as to what other mom's have to say.

 

Most people don't get their twins on a schedule until 4-5 months. Right now you're in survival mode! Don't feel bad about ffing/bfing, what you're doing is great! I survived on take-out food, the crockpot and paper plates. If it didn't NEED to be done right then I would put it off as long as I could. Good luck and hang in there, this is the hardest age with twinfants!

 

I was in the exact same boat as you! I know how you feel. Pump when you can/have to, BF when you have the time and energy, and FF the rest of the time. It helped me alot to make a big batch of bottles (both EBM and Formula) in advance, that way all I had to do was grab 2 bottles, heat them up, and feed one baby after the other. I usually fed whomever was screaming the loudest and refusing to keep the binky in his mouth first. While I was feeding the first baby, I would put the second one on the couch next to me and talk to him and keep popping his binky in his mouth as needed. You will get your schedule down soon, trust me. I've had one since the boys were 2 months old, just try to keep doing the same things with them everyday at the same time each day. It will happen!
As for when they are both screaming and hunger isn't an issue, I would lay on the couch with both of them laying on me and I would sing/talk to them, pat their butts, rub their backs, whatever they wanted until they calmed down. When one was calm, I would put him down so I could walk with the other if I had to.
Just remind yourself that it is ok for babies to cry, as long as they aren't screaming and making themselves hyperventilate, it is ok for them to cry for a few minutes (even though sometimes they make it seem like the world is going to end right then and there).
When you get frustrated, say outloud, "Mommy is doing the best she can. She only has 2 hands, so you are going to have to be patient." I still say this all the time. It's not so much for the babies as it is for me. It helps me to stay calm and not go crazy in that moment.
You will figure out what works for you, I promise.
I still have the same schedule and I still do all of the things I mentioned before. I do this 6-7 days a week by myself, and I only get about an hour of help from DH when he gets home from work. If I can do it anyone can. Just stay calm no matter what! HTH!
Good Luck!
Jessica

 

Its completely do-able! I bf exclusively, no bottles to worry about aand the poo doesn't stink as much! The hour it takes to nurse allows you to rest and you need it as much as they do. When your dh can help, have him help you tandem feed, that cuts time and everything else. Plus feeding at the same time gets you on a similar schedule for sleeping and diapers!

 

I had similar struggles. B/c mine were early they really didn't get the latching on...I really wanted it to work but after 3 months of trying (& crying) realized that getting any BM was better than none. So I decided to just pump and supplement with formula. Being alone with 2 colicky babies left little/no time to pump, which left my supply in bad shape. After another 6 weeks I resigned myself to the fact that it wasn't going to work and stopped pumping. It was sad, but I felt so much better after making a decision and moving on with life.

That being said, I would try to feed them at the same time as much as possible for the reasons Erykah mentioned above. Here are some of the strategies I employed to make this possible.

*Breast feed one on the couch while bottle feeding another next to you on the couch.
*Tandem feed
*Bottle feed (formula or EBM) both
*in bouncy chairs
*in boppies on either side of you on the couch
*place babies in opposite sides of your lap with heads in the
crook of your hip and bodies going outward on the couch

Good luck. Also, Fenugreek (an herbal supplement) worked great for to get my supply up (however if you aren't able to pump 6+ times a day it's not going to help maintain your supply).

 

Thanks for all the responses - it helps and makes me feel less alone!