Gimme a break...

Just venting... So I go to a playgroup, where I make a new acquantance..."Betty" and her daugher "Mary"... I remark how cute her daughter is and ask how old... she says 16 mo, and I state that my kids are 15 mo, and compliment her daughter's verbal output (sorry, it's the SLP in me) b/c I notice her daughter is quite a talker, naming everything in sight, making requests, etc. The mom's reply, "Oh yes, she has a huge vocabulary of OVER a 100 words. She can also name her colors, her numbers, and her ABC's".
BARF!
Ok, now you might be thinking I'm jealous, and a little part of me is, being that I'm a speech Pathologist and my DD's have maybe a 4 word vocabulary, inconsistantly, at 15 mo. However, because of my profession, I also know that this is not a big deal and they'll talk when they are darn good and ready, and that I have done a darn good job of stimulating what language I can. But ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? Does anyone else get sick and tired of hearing about how brilliant someone elses kid is. Esp. when you know it's a singleton mom with no other kids who has all the time in the world to preschool their kid. Anyway, I'm just ranting because it's just one of those things that bugs me, but really, I do understand that she's just proud of her little girl and happy to show it. She seems like a great mom and a nice person, and I've been a bit pissy this week besides, so I guess I should give the lady a break.

 

I have a cousin like that, it drives me nuts!! Just say thanks you for heavens sake!!!! LOL!

 

It's hard. I know i hear stories, here and other places about how many words their kids say etc and I feel some envy. It is perfecty normal also to brag about your kids to others! LOL I guess my bragging rights to everyone is that I am still nursing my two! LOL I hope you have a better week!

 

awww.... I know what you mean... I'm probably one of those mothers!! it does seem like a lot to achieve by 16 months... I don't know about knowing colors and the ABCs...but my kids did all have 100 words by 18 months... I never attributed it to any particular thing I did...except maybe reading a lot to them... But my id. twin sister, who does about the same thing as I do as far as parenting, had a dd, who was her first, and she only had 10 words by age 2... by 2.5 my sister was really starting to worry... but then she just took off..and by age 3 she had caught up completely with my "genius" child. haha... So you are totally right in that it's just not all that important. Not sure if your girls are identical... but incidentally my id. twin and I talked late, b/c we hd our own language going back and forth. Not sure how smart they all thought we were at that age! but we turned out okay! And let me tell you sometimes I really want to turn my chatter boxes OFF!! Like at 6am around the breakfast table when my brain needs to adjust to being in the vertical position when it just wants to be horizontal!!

 

Oooh I am jealous. Wow! So many words. Mine only have about three.

 

Thanks guys for the support. I know that I'm blessed with my girls in so many ways! They aren't identical and they don't really seem to have a twinspeak language... in fact, they really don't communicate much at all with each other except to steal each other's toys!

 

Your story reminds me of a former neighbor. She made everyone around feel inferior because her daughter (first born) could recite her ABC's by 18 months, etc. Well, after 2 years of preschool, I happened to be playing with all the neighborhood kids, and wrote everyones names on the ground in chalk. Her name was the only name there starting with "P", and she couldn't pick out her own name--she was almost 5 at that point. So much for being so far ahead.

Then they had a boy--he didn't talk until he was over 3! My son who was in special ed preschool for speech spoke better then this little boy did, and he was 6 months older than mine.

 

I have a friend like this and I want to punch her all the time... Really punch her.

"the pedi is soooo impressed by his vocab...." "G is perfect I never had any problems with sleeping or with eating" "we go to all the museums he is always soo good" ......

I hate her

She also told a friend doing IVF that she and her husband are sooooooooo fertile they have to be careful when they're in the same room. GRRR

So yes it pisses me off and as a consequence I tend to not brag about my children!

 

I would brag too if my 16 month old had a 100+ word vocab!

I tend to brag every chance I get, BUT I make sure to give the other mom a chance to brag too! Plus it's always neat to hear what other kids are "up to".

 

I'm sure I've been guilty of this before. It's hard when someone ASKS you about something and your kid did something extraordinary and you're just dying to brag... Heck, they opened the door, KWIM? At least she stopped and didn't go into non-related accomplishments.

 

Oh, that would be my DH's sisters.....they constantly get into peeing contests over what gifted program their child is in, blah, blah, blah.

We swore when we had kids we would not compare them to others in the family. We also have decided that when they want to know how N and J are doing developmentally "gifted" milestones we are just going to reply that they were smart enough not to eat the sand in the playbox today.

 

It use to irk me when someone would post a topic about milestones for whatever month we were at and mine were always the ones behind. I felt like certain moms felt their kids could do quantum physics while mine couldn't even speak! Now, I just blow it off because each of mine has their own unique traits that make them gifted to me and I appreciate it now!

 

We had a friend who sent out an email birth announcement with the baby's estimated I.Q. :rotflmbo: (And yes, he was serious.)

 

Yah, my boys aren't talking much of anything. Babbling tons. We were 'assessed' and told that they are playing at the appropriate level so not to worry and they will check with us in 6 months. My FIL is the worst. He talks to everyone about it to get their input. At a recent family event that we weren't able to attend he was told that the boys probably have a hearing problem and that is why they aren't talking. No, they hear fine - and were tested.

These are the situations where I don't completely understand why it isn't socially acceptable to smile politely while cuffing them up the side of the head.

Holly

 

I would brag if I had things to brag as well, but that is not really my point here. I really believe that moms of singletons DO have more time and should have more energy to stimulate a child's learning and therefor shouldn't compare to the development of twins. I just find it hard to hear when a singleton's mom tell me about how they take their 1 kid to Mommy and Me classes and swimming lessons and that makes them more advanced than mine. All that stuff is just much easier to do with one baby.

 

I just love parents like that, my neighbor is one of them...

My husband is a pain about it though, he'll egg her on and on and on until she realizes what a git she sounds like. It makes me laugh every time.

The only reason he does it is to get back at her for the things she said about the girls - they were about 4 weeks early and she would say nothing about how "late" they would be with everything, "Oh, they won't walk until they are at least a year old" - Well, they walked at 9 1/2 months thanks very much...

You just have to play their games and make them realize what they are sounding like. It's more than ok to brag about the munchkins, but most people don't need to know the exact count of their vocab and (I still can't believe someone did it...) their estimated IQ on their birth announcement...I LOVE that!

alexis

 

Unfortunately, I'm probably one of those mother's too, at least with Michael. He does know his alphabet, not only saying it, but can identify all of the uppercase letters...only 1/2 of the lowercase letters. He can count to 20 without assistance and with DH or my help he can go to 100. He just recognizes patterns very quickly. But Mikayla is not saying much...she is signing a lot tho. I'm a teacher for the Deaf and hard of hearing, so I am constantly providing language and talking about EVERYTHING!

I am proud of Michael, but I know that Mikayla is smart too even tho she doesn't do as much as Michael academically. Don't let these people bother you....you know you are giving your children the best! They will have an easier time in school because of you. :hug99:

Bridget

 

I've noticed that some people just need to "one up you."

 

I remember growing up, once my best friend's mom said to my mom, "my daughter's first word was "zamboni" and she was only 7 months old!" and my mom said "well, my daughter was writing research papers by then!"
Nothing like a little sarcasm to shut someone up.

Myself, I like to hear how other people's kids are doing because I always like a new barometer on my kids. BUT, I also like to hear it to hear how delusional people are about their kids. It cracks me up what people will brag about!

 

I would probably find it more obnoxious if the mom started off the coversation out of no where. Like, Hi, you know what my daughter can do? She can blah blah blah blah... But since you had acknowledged her duaghters skill first, she probably felt it an opportunity to share how wonderfully she is doing. She is quite a bit advanced if she can do all those things she claims she can do but...so what. They all catch up to each other eventually. My one dd seems to be developing a vocabulary much faster than the other even though they are exposed to all the same things. I know eventually the other will catch up so I'm not at all concerned. I can understand how you felt at the time but I'm sure her intentions weren't to throw it in your face in any kind of mean way. She's just proud and that's how we should all feel about our kids for whatever skills and accomplishments they have acheived thus far.

 

QUOTE(double-or-nothing @ Jul 15 2007, 09:55 AM) [snapback]331516[/snapback]
I would probably find it more obnoxious if the mom started off the coversation out of no where. Like, Hi, you know what my daughter can do? She can blah blah blah blah... But since you had acknowledged her duaghters skill first, she probably felt it an opportunity to share how wonderfully she is doing. She is quite a bit advanced if she can do all those things she claims she can do but...so what. They all catch up to each other eventually. My one dd seems to be developing a vocabulary much faster than the other even though they are exposed to all the same things. I know eventually the other will catch up so I'm not at all concerned. I can understand how you felt at the time but I'm sure her intentions weren't to throw it in your face in any kind of mean way. She's just proud and that's how we should all feel about our kids for whatever skills and accomplishments they have acheived thus far.


My thoughts are very similar to this post.

I don't mind at all when parents brag - I am just glad the child has a parent who appreciates & admires them. I don't buy the argument that is is "making the parent feel important" or "one upmanshp" - every child deserves a parent who thinks they are the most brilliant. beautiful creature on earth. I would have smiled at the woman & said "your daughter is very special. It is sweet to see you so proud." I am not as fond of the "look at my big diamond" or "look at our new car" - but if anyone wants to brag about their child - they will have an appreciative audience in me. I don't ever, ever compare my children to other kids - no one in the world has as cute a smirk as Isabella & no one on the planet can wink as adorably as Marissa-among many, many other precious talents they have. My children are clearly - in my eyes - superior to all other kids & I am quite secure in that fact. I think that is why I am a patient listener to parents who want to catalogue their kids' achievements.