Getting them to sleep in later

My 2 are consistently awake between 4:30-5am. Sometimes as early as 3:30 :icon_eek: . But Then sometimes they sleep till 6 with no problem. But of course, NEVER at the same time! (here it's 6:30am and Nate is still sleeping...but Gabe was awake at 4:30) So mommy is a very tired girl!! I've tried shortening their naps and putting them to bed later - both with no success. I run in and get them at their first sound in the AM because I don't want them waking up big brother (3yo). If he wakes up early, my day is totally miserable.

Well, I've had enough. I need to sleep. It's affecting my moods. So, I've decided to bring 3yo to bed with me and DH so that he's not disturbed, and try to get these babies sleep habits to change. Does anyone think this is even possible?? Do you think it can be changed after 20 months of bad habits being allowed by mommy? If I leave them in there till 6am (I could live with 6, even though I am SO jealous of those with 7-8am waker's!!), do you think eventually they would start sleeping later? Can I do a CIO?

Any thoughts would be appreciated. I've asked about it before but I guess I just wasn't fed up enough and always let my 3yo be an excuse. Now that wake up is inching earlier and earlier, I am done!

TIA!!

 

What do you normally do when they wake at 4:30? Do you get them up? What I would do is go in when they wake up, tell them it is still time for "night night" or whatever you call it in your house and say you'll be back at whatever time you decide on. You could start with 5:30 and inch it up as they get used to the new routine. From the time mine are babies, like 5mos, wakeup time is never before 7 so I've not had to deal with it at this age. It might be tough, but YOU get tough and they'll catch on. Just a brief recovering, handing back a lovey, etc and quick, quiet reminder that you'll get them up at whatever time and leave. It WILL get better!

 

Rhea-just this morning Trevor started crying at 6am, that is too early for me. Usually when he wakes us he just sits in his bed and talks. So when he wakes up crying, he obviously is not ready to get up. He was fine, so I let him cry himself back to sleep. He was back asleep in 15 min. and slept 2.25 more hours and got up at 8:15.

I think you can change the sleeping habits, it just might take a bit longer since they are so used to what is happening now. You just have to decide on what you want to do and stick with it, that is the key. Good luck.

 

I NEVER go in when it is that early but like you said you have your 3 yr. old in there. I started having the same problem about two weeks ago they were waking by 5:30am so I would let it go they did cry for a bit, wake the other up by calling their name then they play...the earliest I go in is 6:30am. This week I started putting them up at 8Pm and they started waking by 6:30am and this morning 7am so hopefully it is working. Are you able to put your 3yr old in another room by himself?

 

We had this issue for a while. I said its too early and still not time to get up. I still use it if its before 7am.
Keep at it they'll get it. Or play in their beds for a while. Thats too early....my mood would be killer being up at that hour everyday.

 

Mine just started waking up early. What we are doing with Danielle (the main culprit) is telling her it's still not time to get up, we'll take her to the bathroom and tell her she has to go back to her bed until she hears the music go off (we set the alarm for 7am). If they are both up, we told them they could turn on the light and play in their room. But that they can't disturb us. They do still bother us, but it's getting much better and this past weekend, Rachel went back to sleep twice and one time slept until 8:15. So, I think they go through these phases and you just need to be consistent and let them know that it's not happening and they will eventually stop. I assume they are still in cribs. If that's the case, how about giving them a couple toys/books they can play with until it's time to get up. Have there been any changes in your household recently? I believe ours started because we let our nanny go and then daddy went out of town and it was just too much change too quickly.

 

QUOTE(ktfan @ Jan 22 2008, 06:37 AM) [snapback]583733[/snapback]
What do you normally do when they wake at 4:30? Do you get them up?

I run in and get them (even though I'm in a sleepy daze!). Sometimes I don't even realize how early it is because I'm just trying to quiet them before they wake the 3yo.

QUOTE(Shadyfeline @ Jan 22 2008, 06:52 AM) [snapback]583766[/snapback]
Are you able to put your 3yr old in another room by himself?


The only other room that he can be in, is with me and DH. I had him sleep with us last night...but he is a wild one! I brought him with us, but still got Gabe at 5am.


QUOTE(egoury @ Jan 22 2008, 06:57 AM) [snapback]583783[/snapback]
Have there been any changes in your household recently? I believe ours started because we let our nanny go and then daddy went out of town and it was just too much change too quickly.


We just moved (beginning of this month). But it was like this before...maybe just not quite as early (probably up at 5...but no 3:30 wake ups)

Thanks for the tips. I hope I can be strong!

 

You can TOTALLY do CIO. I was going through the same thing for a while. For months my girls were waking up at 5 or 5:30 and I would struggle to get up and then I was so cranky and pissy that I wasn't being the loving mommy first thing in the am that I should be. So, I got some advice from the ladies here and I finally decided that I could do 6am but no earlier. So if they woke up, I just let them play in their crib or fuss and whine. Fortunately, my girls never really cried. They have always been patient in waiting for me. I think it helps that it is still dark in their room as well. They eventually would fall back asleep and it got to the point where I decided, ok, no earlier than 6:30. I just feel so much more rested and happier when I am able to sleep until at least 6am. Somehow waking up at 5 something is just so aweful. I can't imagine 4:30!! GL and keep us posted.

 

Rhea - usually when they wake that early they fuss for a few minutes and then will fall back to sleep - are they waking to eat (do you give them breakfast at 5:30)? if yes perhaps delaying bkfst till say 6 will get them to sleep later since they know they aren't getting food the minute they wake up - otherwise I'd say just let 'em cry - they'll fall back to sleep...can you put one of the twins in a PNP somewhere else - maybe separating THEM rather than separating the 3 yo will help curb the urges...

 

We have 1 early bird that likes to do the 5 am or earlier wake up call and then can not go back to sleep.

I set a timer on a light in their room and told them when the light was on, it was wake up time....at 20 months or so. And I DID NOT go in before 6:30....sure enough it worked, though it does take a week or so. Can you set up a 'tent' bed for your 3 yr old for a bit in your room so the twinkies can CIO or otherwise learn the light on-wake up??

I also scooted bedtime earlier and suprisingly it also helped.

Good Luck...URGH! before 6 am is too early!

 

No offense to all those who can leave their kids for 15-minutes and they magically go back to sleep for an additional 2 hours....but that's not the case with everyone. We tried these tactics -with consistency- but no success.

We have had similar issues, though 4:30am was the earliest.

We used a night light set to a lamp timer so it would come ON at 'wake up time'.

We talked it up to them during the day about waiting for their light to get bright, bright and how Mommy and Daddy couldn't come get them until their light came on. If they woke up and their light wasn't on, it was still night-night time and they needed to go back to sleep.

We started with the light coming on at/near the time they were currently waking up then slowly inched it in 10- to 15-minute increments until it got to what I could live with (6am).

Feel free to PM me if you want more specific details. I've been there and IT SUCKS!

 

My girls get up between 5:30-6:00 every morning. Wants in a blue moon they sleep till 7. For a while they were waking up as early as 3:30 and would come into our bed (not going back to sleep). I eventually couldn't take it any more. New rule - if you wake up before 5am you are going back into your own bed. We had a few early mornings with hysterical screaming but now things are better.
I like the idea with the alarm clock. I think we will try that , maybe we can push the wake up time to 6:30am.
Good Luck!! :blush:
Julia

 

QUOTE
I also scooted bedtime earlier and suprisingly it also helped.


This is what I was going to suggest. I know it seems like it should have an opposite effect (going to bed early should mean getting up early and going to bed late should mean getting up later logically but sometimes it works completely backwards) but it might help.

 

Rhea, John and the twins share a room. At first I was worried about the nightly crying waking him but I found if I just let it go on, John has learned to sleep through it. He doesn't even hear it anymore, even if it goes on for over 1/2 hour. I would just leave them in there and ignore them.

Get a good set of ear plugs. That what I do. It works wonders!

 

We had the same problem and I still have an early risers but he has learned to jsut entertain himself until 7:30. I can not function all day if we get up at 5:30 when Collin wakes up.

I read a bunch of books on sleeping and everyone stated that if they were having trouble sleeping or waking "early" to put them to bed at an EARLIER time. It has to do with them being too tierd. I used a combination of Health Sleep Habits for a Healthy Baby, The Happiest Baby on the Block and Babywise. I just taliored them to fit my families needs.

It worked wonders for us. We had a 6:30 bedtime until last fall and my boys just turned two. Now we go to bed around 7:30 but I try to keep it consitant. I NEVER let them stay up past 7:30 and NEVER get them out of bed before 7:30am.

Eventially Collin learned to just entertain himself and we have not had any problems, but if I am even a few minutes late in the morning he will begin to cry. I have not figured out how he can tell it is 7:30! Lucas sleeps like a rock and Collin has never bothered him.

 

QUOTE(AmynTony @ Jan 22 2008, 08:17 AM) [snapback]583918[/snapback]
Rhea - usually when they wake that early they fuss for a few minutes and then will fall back to sleep - are they waking to eat (do you give them breakfast at 5:30)? if yes perhaps delaying bkfst till say 6 will get them to sleep later since they know they aren't getting food the minute they wake up


bad mommy confession...they get a bottle when they wake up. And then we don't usually eat until 7ish. I mostly give them the bottle so that "I" don't have to think about breakfast so early and this buys me time.

QUOTE(SweetpeaG @ Jan 22 2008, 10:33 AM) [snapback]584166[/snapback]
No offense to all those who can leave their kids for 15-minutes and they magically go back to sleep for an additional 2 hours....but that's not the case with everyone. We tried these tactics -with consistency- but no success.

We have had similar issues, though 4:30am was the earliest.

We used a night light set to a lamp timer so it would come ON at 'wake up time'.

We talked it up to them during the day about waiting for their light to get bright, bright and how Mommy and Daddy couldn't come get them until their light came on. If they woke up and their light wasn't on, it was still night-night time and they needed to go back to sleep.

We started with the light coming on at/near the time they were currently waking up then slowly inched it in 10- to 15-minute increments until it got to what I could live with (6am).

Feel free to PM me if you want more specific details. I've been there and IT SUCKS!


How old were your kiddos when you did this? Mine are currently 20 months...I just don't feel like they would understand this. Although I love the concept.

So I put them to bed tonight like normal (at 7:30), but I gave them their teletubbies that play music in hopes that they will entertain themselves in the morning when they wake up. So far, they have spent 30 mins playing with their toy and not going to sleep! It's always something.

Where do you get a lamp timer? Hardware store?

Thanks for your help!!

 

QUOTE(Sarah© @ Jan 22 2008, 04:52 PM) [snapback]584868[/snapback]
Rhea, John and the twins share a room. At first I was worried about the nightly crying waking him but I found if I just let it go on, John has learned to sleep through it. He doesn't even hear it anymore, even if it goes on for over 1/2 hour. I would just leave them in there and ignore them.

Get a good set of ear plugs. That what I do. It works wonders!


Ya know, if Ant falls asleep in the car or something, then the babies can scream and he won't wake up. He will mostly sleep through their night time crys as well. But when it's close to wake up time, I think he must be sleeping lighter, because he wakes up.

I like earplugs!

 

QUOTE(mommy23monkeys @ Jan 22 2008, 10:57 PM) [snapback]585111[/snapback]
Ya know, if Ant falls asleep in the car or something, then the babies can scream and he won't wake up. He will mostly sleep through their night time crys as well. But when it's close to wake up time, I think he must be sleeping lighter, because he wakes up.

I like earplugs!


I totally understand, I think that an earlier bedtime might help...one nap during the day too. And I think that Ant will eventually not get up early. John stopped that too. I think it will probably get worse before it gets better. Sorry

 

I split a pediasure into their after dinner sippies. It tends to prevent the morning hunger wakeups - especially if they didn't have a good dinner. Hope that helps too.

 

QUOTE(mommy23monkeys @ Jan 22 2008, 07:53 PM) [snapback]585101[/snapback]
How old were your kiddos when you did this? Mine are currently 20 months...I just don't feel like they would understand this. Although I love the concept.


We actually started this at about 16months. And you're right "getting it" is a stretch...but they do get it. There will be a learning curve. Just talk it up during the day...show them what the light looks like on and off. If nothing else they will eventually be conditioned to expect you to come in only after the light turns on.


QUOTE
Where do you get a lamp timer? Hardware store?

I got ours at Target but yes, any harware store should have one. I would recommend going for a digital one over a manual one because you'll have more options for 'turn on' time and can inch it slowly later and later by smaller increments than on the non-digital timers.

OTHER TIPS:
Also, when they make it to the light MAKE A HUGE DEAL OUT OF IT (especially if they had a 'hard time' making it to the designated time). Reinforce that you're there to get them because they light got "bright-bright" and that means it's time to get up, not because they are crying.

My other recommendation, as with most parenting advice, is that you have to be CONSISTENT. If you go get them before the light goes on...even if it's only 2 minutes...you're doing it all for nothing. The babies don't realize the timer is going to go off in two minutes and before you know it the expectations (I don't have to always wait for the light) have changed and you're back at square one.