getting them to help

E&E will not help pick up their toys. We really need to scale down andfigure out how to get them to help. I know I should have started this a long time ago but didn't. Now they have to help.

 

I have problems with it as well. They seem to do a great job at daycare/school. I did start a sticker chart which helped where if they do certain things (cleaning being one of them), they can get a sticker at the end of the day. Another thing I do is tell them if they don't clean up, they can't go do ______ (fill in the blank). And finally, I tell them they can always make a big mess as long as they are willing to clean it up.

 

This has been a challenge in my house too. We sing the "clean up" song and make a lot of fun and silliness out of it. That seems to work most of the time. When they do pick up, I make a big deal about it.

 

We do the clean up song that we learned in mommy & Me classes... they have gotten the gist of helping clean up. SOmetimes they chose not to... at those times, I will physically put something in their hands and walk them to where it goes. Kids learn by watching others clean up and adults doing it along side of. I'm not the best at keeping this place cleaned up.. and they aren't the best at picking up after themselves. GOod luck!

 

Something that always helped with mine (still does in fact) is to ask them to tidy one specific thing at a time. I find that if I say "Tidy up time. Put the toys away, please." they will quite often just stand around, but if I say "Tidy up time. Luke will you put the cars away, please. Naomi come and put this puzzle back in its box, please." then they are able to focus and get the job done. When they were younger I used to move the box for the toy right next to where that toy was and then they could just sit and put it in the box, but I don't bother to do that now they're older.
Another benifit to asking them to do specific things is that if one is being grumpy the other doesn't end up doing all the work because after they've finished the things they had to do they can stop, while the one having a strop still has their bit to do. I also nearly always tidy up with them-it stops any complaints of "But I didn't play with this" because I can say that we're all helping to tidy up together.
Putting clean up time before something fun is good too, that way they have a sort of reward when they're done. When mine were younger I always arranged it so that we'd tidy up right before snack and TV/story time. They knew that they couldn't have a story until the room was tidy.

As long as you stick with expecting them to help they should get used to it pretty quickly.

 

I agree with PPs.
1. sing a clean up song
2. specify which item each child is to pick up
3. use a timer -- if this room is picked up in 5 min, you will get a special treat. (candy or dried fruit or something)
4. I also say things like "be responsible to help with the work of the house."
5. lots of bragging when it's done, "doesn't that make you feel good?"
6. schedule 2 clean up times per day -- before lunch, before dinner (and DH is home)

 

We race. I ask mine (only 1 3yr old at this time) to do something like pick up all the books and tell her I'm going to race her while I put the dishes away or something like that. Usually it works, but sometimes she will tell me 'I can't, you're too fast' so it doesn't always work. I also tell her all the time that she did a good job so now when she does something she asks me, 'Am I a good jobber mom?'