Getting stroller resistant

I'm not sure if I should try backpack harnesses, somehow train them to listen and stay with me better, or just say "too bad" when they want out of the stroller. I still use the stroller for things like the mall, fairs, things like that. Bea is getting to where she tolerates it for maybe 15 min and then starts screaming "OUT!!" and thrashing around. I'm going to the mall this afternoon and wondering if I would be able to handle them loose with no stroller. Ainsley does not listen at all and will wander away from me. Bea is fast and tends to run off. Not sure how they will take to harnesses. It's getting to where outings like this are not enjoyable because they get miserable so fast. Ainsley would probably still be OK with the stroller, but once Bea starts, she picks it up too.

 

My boys were, from the sounds of it, a bit less prone to running away, but there was a point at around the same age as yours, when I really had to get serious about teaching them to stay with me. It started at the park. A park with a steep, wild slope on one side and a parking lot on the other. One boy ran over the hill, the other ran towards the road. I grabbed the one headed for the road, strapped him in the stroller and then chased the other one down and put him in the stroller too. I explained that I can't have them running away from me at the park. If they do it, we have to leave. So, we left. Same thing the next day. They were so bummed to leave the park, that it didn't take them very long to get it. And if only one ran away, he got put in the stroller until he agreed not to run. If he did it again, we left.

And, at the same time, I got serious about holding hands if they weren't in the stroller. If they wanted out (at the store, walking someplace, etc.) then they had to hold my hand. If they couldn't do that, then they went back in the stroller or we went home.

Let them know you are serious. Take a week or so where you are willing to sacrifice your days to getting the message through to them. It's not fun, but it's been the best lesson I've taught my boys -- for their sake, and mine!

Best of luck! And, if it doesn't work, the backpack leashes seem to work well.

 

Right now we're very ademant about holding hands, but I'm seriously thinking of getting them the backpack harnesses soon. Especially with being pregnant - right now it's hard to bend and hold both of their hands with this big ol' belly.

 

Can I just tell you how much I love having Ellen around? I saw she was the lone replier when I was clicking on this and thought, I don't know why I am reading this I know Ellen will have said everything I am thinking..............sure enough.........so I won't repeat I will just say small doses and set the boundaries you will want forever starting now. K&K learned quickly to respond to the words far enough and stop (far enough got farther and farther as long as I knew they would respond when spoken to). Once you have established what is acceptable then you will find you will be able to stay at the park longer, at the store longer etc etc but in the beginning go for short periods and if you are going to stores I would go just to go not necessarily because you have a mission or that might ruin the 'training' process (you will want to accomplish your mission even if they aren't behaving and that will null and void the whole procedure).

 

We let them run around the park and when they don't come back, I load them in the stroller and we leave. My daughter is much better at listening than my son (who loves to sprint). We also have the backpack harnesses and I am not afraid to use them at all. I have not attempted to do this in the mall yet though, I am not ready. Luckily, they still don't mind the stroller but I am sure that will be coming to an end soon. Good luck!

 

I wasn't ready to give up my stroller until 3 years old so, when my two went through that phase, I tried to make the stroller into a fun place. I never let them out when they whined so that they wouldn't think that getting out was an option and I'd give them toys and snacks that they only got in the stroller. They got their first little lollipops in the stroller , crackers, little plastic animals, magnadoodles, etc. Finally, they stopped complaining.

Like Ellen said, anytime they were out of the stroller they had to hold my hands because they were apt to wander away without realizing it.

 

We used the harness....my girls were not big fans of the stroller either and they loved the harness. They would put them on themselves!! I didnt like them before I had the girls then it was required!

 

Thanks for the replies. I have a nearby park that I can use for practice, i.e. having them hold my hands and leaving if needed. BTW, I went to the mall today and attempted it without a stroller. Total disaster! I was meeting my mother, so I thought it would go OK but she was running late. Then they were fascinated with the car rides and the fountain, I couldn't pry them away from it, so I went in the store while my mom watched them. She got frustrated with the running off and not listening (bright spot is, now she knows what I'm talking about). Anyhoo.. looks like I need to bring the stroller for now.

 

At that age, I gave them no options but the stroller or wagon. They might have complained a few times, but they found out quickly that didn't work and didn't complain anymore.

 

Definitely get the harnesses! My girls LOVE them! They always ask to put their backpacks on. It's so cute. THey love buckling them theirselves (which usually ends up in a pinched finger but they pitch a fit if we buckle them) and hugging the bears once we are back in the car.

Another option might be to maybe rent one of those strollers in the mall. They are usually pretty open strollers and not as confining or close contact as regular strollers. They might enjoy the more open feel of those strollers. We've gotten those a couple of times just b/c they have more storage than our stroller when shopping and my girls tend to like those...it's something different for them, KWIM?

 

Kelly, glad your mom knows what you're talking about now, at least!

After my "no stroller" experience at the library a few weeks ago, I will NOT be trying anything like that again soon. Now that they are almost too big for me to pick one up in each arm and haul them out of someplace (which is what I wound up doing at the library), I think they're going to be strapped in until they learn to walk with me.