Funny things YOU say

This was inspired by Aimee's FB status

What are funny things you never thought would come out of your mouth?

Lately I've been saying "Only PRETEND licking!" a lot. My girls like to pretend they are puppies and are licking everything. It totally grosses me out. Oh and related to that "Stop licking your sister's tongue!" I thought this old man at Kohls was going to pass out at my girls' x-rated antics on the check out line the other day.

 

"Don't screw each other" (What they call screwdriving, which in turn makes me laugh even harder when Alice says, "Screw me.")

"Dragons don't really bite their princesses." (Royce and Alice were dragons and princesses the other day and biting each other.)

My favorite: "OMG Who pooped in the bath??"

 

"Please do not put your toothbrush in your vagina." Why do I keep the toothbrushes within reach of the changing table?

"We do not eat poo-poo!" After picking up and examining some horse manure.

"You only get to eat two pieces of dog food, so no more."

 

I love this thread!!

One of the most frequently used in this house is " DO NOT CLIMB ON YOUR BROTHER!!"

 

"Please take your finger out of your sister's butt!" Luckily this was only said once in the bath!

 

Even funnier is hearing my DH talk like them! "No wa wa on floor!" "no throw food"...

 

Great Thread.

1. Avi, don't lick the bottom of your sisters shoe.

2. Ok Kitty Avi, come and eat this one off the floor.

3. Ok, I don't know why you want to but you CAN see my poop!

 

Singing "Everybody Poops Sometime" to the tune of "Everybody Hurts"& "Potty all the Time" to the tune of 'Party all the time'

Yes, my children do think I have lost their mind and will probably write a tell all someday. Sigh.

 

Ian - PLEASE don't lick your sisters tongue!

Abigail - yes that is Ian's winky, no its not yours to play with, no you won't grow one when you get older...

No, the cat does NOT want to eat your dinner! Please don't feed it to him or it will make him poop till he's inside out!

 

Get your googlies on!

 

Oh man, now its in my head! "Everybody Pooooops...... Sometimes..." :laughing:

I sing Super Pooper to ABBA's "Super Trooper."

Amy, nice to know I'm not the only one's who has kids who like to french kiss!

 

Another ABBA poop fan here. Pooping King instead of Dancing Queen:

Josh is the pooping king, young and sweet only 2 years old (I've been singing this since he was 8 months)

Josh is the pooping king, phew that stinks, plug your nose.

Josh can poop, he's the man, stinking up the garbage can.......ewwwwwww

Josh can poop, yes he can...he is my pooping king.

 

You had me in tears laughing because I remember Lily crouching down to examine Max's parts about 6 months ago after a bath. I thought DH was going to lose it, but I explained she was just curious why he had an outie and she had an innie.

 

Kristin - exactly!!!

 

:rofl:

Well mine from FB was "No hitting each other with hammers". My mom brought them rubber gavels from some convention she went to, and the girls think they are hammers.

That's the only one I can think of at the moment!

 

"we don't french kiss our mommies," "please stop licking me" (and, on a daily basis) "ok, you can hold your penis w/each hand for ten seconds when i finish changing your diaper!"