For those with the Live in Nanny

Hi ladies,

My twin dd are 19 months & I am working full time having a nanny look after the girls.

The issue is that when we come home from work & at the weekends when the nanny is not around, they go crazy! They become very clingy, cracky, throw tantrums, hardly eat with me & DH! We cannot do anything else but be with them! We can't even have our dinner in peace when they are around!!!!

They are SO good with the nanny it's unreal!!! She says they don't behave like that with her at all! We try to spend a lot of time with them & I know know who mum & dad are too.

Is it the same for you guys?? Any advice please??

Thanks in advance
Hina

 

Hina,

I have a full time nanny as well (she doesn't live with us, but is here during the day). I have noticed that my girls are especially fussy when we're both with them, but they usually settle down as soon as I leave for work in the morning or the nanny leaves in the afternoon. That fifteen minutes of overlap is very difficult, though - clingy, whiney, etc.

Is it possible that you have a different routine than the nanny? Can you ask her to write down how she does things so you can try to see if her techniques work for you? Also, if your nanny is giving them her undivided attention, your kids probably expect that of you too. Otherwise, they see you home but not paying attention to them and it might confuse them. My DH and I need to get things done on weekends too, so sometimes only one of us will play with girls and pay full attention to them and the other can get projects done.

My girls are only 15 months, but there are no "dinners in peace" here either. It's usually a free for all of throwing food, giggling, trying to get out of high chairs, etc. I suspect it will be a while before we can eat calmly, you're probably in that same stage too.

Good luck!


QUOTE(Heena @ Aug 22 2008, 10:21 AM) [snapback]942509[/snapback]
Hi ladies,

My twin dd are 19 months & I am working full time having a nanny look after the girls.

The issue is that when we come home from work & at the weekends when the nanny is not around, they go crazy! They become very clingy, cracky, throw tantrums, hardly eat with me & DH! We cannot do anything else but be with them! We can't even have our dinner in peace when they are around!!!!

They are SO good with the nanny it's unreal!!! She says they don't behave like that with her at all! We try to spend a lot of time with them & I know know who mum & dad are too.

Is it the same for you guys?? Any advice please??

Thanks in advance
Hina

 

I think it is just a parent thing. My girls act totally differently for me and DH than they do for the nanny and daycare.

 

QUOTE(Babies4Susan @ Aug 22 2008, 02:02 PM) [snapback]942701[/snapback]
I think it is just a parent thing. My girls act totally differently for me and DH than they do for the nanny and daycare.



Same thing with my boys. For some reason they act the craziest with Dh and I. I have also noticed if both of us are there they tend to be even worse than they are if one of us is handling them alone. Not sure why.

 

Thanks for your replies. Glad to hear it's not just me or my bad parenting skills!! lol!

Well, I have the same routine as the nanny but it is hard to keep over the weekends. Also, I do believe that that the nanny spends all her time with them so you are right that they expect the same from us. We have millions of chores to do unlike the nanny!!!

Can't wait for the peaceful dinner times or even eating out!!

Hina