For those of you who didn't do CIO

I'm butting in over here a little early (mine will be 1 on 12/11). My son has been a great sleeper since 4 1/2 months and even though we didn't do anything differently with my daughter she is not as good of a sleeper. She wakes up 1-2 times a night still. And really the 2nd time is usually within an hour of the first time she goes back to sleep so I don't think she is initially falling back into a deep sleep. We had tried CIO with her in the past but I can't handle hearing her cry and my DH has to get up really early for work so it's not really an option for him to do it. Anyway, what I do now is go in and jiggle her bottom. She'll go back to sleep and sometimes stay asleep but sometimes wake up again within an hour.

I am wondering if this means I'll always be going in and patting her bottom. If you didn't do CIO what did you do and how is your LO sleeping now in the 2nd year?

 

No we did not do CIO. Dillon will hold his breath crying till he passes out. Lucas has night terrors off and on. They sleep horribly most of the time. Dillon ends up in bed with us every night...at that point he will sleep fine. Lucas ends up on the sofa with me a few nights a week and once there he sleeps fine. We have created horrible sleep habits for our boys, but after so many months of dealing with unrestful nights, we do what we have to and their doctor says it is fine as long as we are all getting sleep, that when they are older and can understand, we can break the habit.

 

I started to do CIO and then realized it wasn't for me. However, there have been times that I let my daughter CIO because she has been up multiple times(5-10), doesn't want a bottle or wants to be held by me for hours on end. My husband doesn't help me at night, except on weekends, because he gets up very early for work, and I stay home, so I do my nights alone and most nights my son is up once and my daughter is up a few times. With that said, last night I decided to let her CIO, and I was going to to go in after five minutes and rock her back to sleep, but that didn't even happen. I heard her wimper for about two minutes at one point and that was it. She slept 12 hours straight! So the test will be what happens in the next few nights. I still got up with my son last night since he didn't eat well yesterday and needed his bottle but tonight I am going to do the same for him. I figure they are only babies once and in time we will be wishing for these days back.

 

We held off on sleep training until about 13 months. They were still getting up a couple times a night each. We were exhausted and finally did a weaning/check in sleeping plan. We reduced their formula one ounce a night until it was gone. Then we would check on their crying and verbally reassure them, but not pick them up.
I really wanted them to outgrow it on their own, but it didn't happen for us.
The wiggling thing is really cute, but probably not for you in the middle of the night!

 

My kids sttn for the most part and we didn't do CIO but sometimes I still have to go in and put in their soothers or give them their lovies. They are real blanket kids and it usually helps them self soothe even when they do wake up. Do your kids like anything like that? one mine really likes the satin corner of his blanket while the other just likes the soft material. I find that when they do wake up for the most part the find their blankets and put themselves back to sleep. It took a while to get them to this stage though. Best of luck

 

I had phases where I had to pat DS's bottom to calm him down, but I never did CIO and he's been totally back on track for a long time now. When he had his sleep issue (suddenly waking once or twice after STTN for months before that), I did everything - patted his bottom, got him a white noise machine, and added a crib mirror with music that he sometimes turned on himself. It was a passing phase and I was able to get rid of all of it pretty quickly. I kept the white noise the longest (probably from around 6 months until maybe 11 months), but then got rid of that, too. Now I put them in their cribs, read a few stories, play a 10 minute lullaby (it's a sound and light machine that puts stars on the ceiling), and they're out til morning. So long story short: no, I'm not still patting bottoms anymore! GL finding what works for you!!

 

We didn't do CIO or any sleep training. In fact, we did everything "wrong" in the first year. Nursed to sleep, rocked, went in and soothed them with the satin edge of their blanket when they cried, etc. Somehow, they managed to learn to put themselves to sleep in spite of us. I credit the super-consistent bedtime routine and the comfort it brought them knowing exactly what to expect and when. Oh, and the thumb sucking couldn't have hurt either although one dropped it at 8 months and the other at 30 months so that's not what's doing the trick now. Heck, they don't even snuggle the satin much anymore and I find their blankies on the floor sometimes so I guess we're past needing anything to get to sleep.

Honestly, I think it has more to do with the child than the parent, myself. Some kids just need more help than others.

 

we didnt do CIO and nope I havent had to go in unless they've become ill.
Sometimes I hear them jibber jabber in the middle of the night, or now that we are in toddler beds (switched at 19 months) I find them in bed with one another but They go to bed at 730 and I dont see them again for 12 hours

I was night nursing etc until 13 months when I called it quits. We explained what night time was for, and picked a time when my DH could tend to them for a few nights. Everytime they got up he went and comforted and re-explained what night time was for and that we'd see them in the morning. If its always you that goes in, Im wondering if she does it for your attention?
my kids also have lovies that they HAVE to sleep with. Are your kids attached to anything?

We use white noise, and a SOLID bedtime routine each and every night. Same thing with wake-up. I say the same things every morning.

Best of luck

 

I think a lot of it depends on the kid. I never had to do CIO for my daughter, she is a great sleeper. Hardly ever wakes up, takes great naps, if I only had her I would think I was a brilliant sleep trainer (even though I didn't do anything other than have her on a good routine). But my son is a different story. They've always been on the same routine, but he's just a bad sleeper. I did CIO with him at 8 months when he was going through separation anxiety and we were spending hours trying to get him to go to sleep. It did work. But he's a light sleeper, easily wakes, and often goes through phases where he wants to be held for a few minutes. and I find it easier just to go to him once a night and sit with him for a few minutes. When he starts doing it several times a night again is when I go back to CIO.

So to answer your question, my situation is the opposite of what you would think. The child I did a little bit of CIO with is the one who still wakes up at almost 20 months. And the child I never did anything with, I rarely hear a peep from her. But I don't think it has anything to do with anything other than it's just the way the child is. Some people luck out with great sleepers, and others struggle with bad ones.

 

we never did CIO and mine sttn. up until about 10m we would "pacifier pop".. basically, if we heard them wake up and start to escalate we'd go in and replace the paci. it used to happen 1 or 2 times a night at most.

the wakeups sort of stopped on their own... well, actually, the escalations stopped. like any human sometimes they wake up, but now they roll around and go back to sleep on their own.

 

Thanks for the responses ladies! No, she doesn't take a pacifier and doesn't really have a lovey that she is totally attached to. She likes a little bunny that my neighbor knitted for her but I don't think she uses it to self-soothe. Oh and my son does suck his thumb so I had wondered if that was the difference. She has a giraffe blankie that is soft on one side & satiny on the other. I wonder if I should start to try to help her to grab that in the middle of the night. But she sleeps on her stomach so that might be kind of hard. I think we have a good bedtime routine and I keep a machine in their room that plays a rain noise.

Well, that is encouraging to hear that this doesn't have to be a life sentence! Although, we were watching Super Nanny tonight and it took the parents over 2 1/2 hours from when they first tried to put their kids to bed until they were asleep. It was exhausting just watching it!