For those of you who did CIO

I know CIO is something everyone has an opinion about, so I'm just asking those of you who used this method for your opinions and advice. I'm not sure I can go through with it all the way, I tried it with my 4 year old dd when she was a baby and it tore my heart out hearing her cry, so I didn't keep up with it...of course, she's four and sleeps with me STILL. I want to teach the twins some good sleep habits and be able to just share my bed with my husband! This is something I am willing to give a try again.

I'm just wanting to know from those of you who had success with it:

1. How old were your twins when you began
2. How long did they cry for, the first day, first week, etc.
3. How long did it take for them to fall asleep on their own without crying.

And basically anything else you could add. I haven't read any books on it, I've only read articles online and from what I've googled. My boy/girl twins are almost 3 months old, (they are 11 1/2 weeks). They are starting to sleep longer at night, but I'd like to be able to put them down and have them fall asleep on their own. With older dd, I had to rock her for a long time, and walk around with her and as she grew, it hurt my back. I like soothing my babies, I enjoy that time with them. But at the same time, I don't have the energy (especially once they get bigger) to rock and walk them.

 

My boys would only sleep in their swings, so at 5.5 (4.5 adjusted) months old, we threw them in their cribs and let them CIO. Prior to that, I had been extremely opposed to CIO but we had tried everything and nothing else worked. The first night is the hardest. They cried for 40 minutes. I cried too! After a week, they fell asleep without crying.
Now, at 7 months, they go down pretty easy. Sometimes they still fuss or cry and we will occasionally go in and check on them. But overall, everyone in this house is sleeping more and better!
I believe 4 months is the minimum age recommended for CIO, so your babies might be a little young yet. Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child is a good book to read for more info. Good luck, whatever you decide to do!

 

My boys were 9 months when I finally gave in and did CIO. I tried many other methods first, and nothing worked. Part of it was we got into bad habits early on because of their severe reflux (having to keep them upright for 45 minutes after eating, so they didn't learn to fall asleep on their own, etc.), and sheer desperation of needing our own sleep led us to some bad habits, too. I finally gave in when I fell asleep driving one day from sheer exhaustion. None of us were hurt and minor damage to my car from hitting a curb, but it scared me a LOT to think of what could have happened, and I knew something had to give.

We did the more modified version of cry it out. We did nighttime first, and we would go in at intervals, hug them and cuddle them for a minute without picking them up, remind them to go night-night, and leave again after about a minute. The first night we went in after I think 3 minutes, 7 minutes, and then in 10 minute segments until they were asleep. It took about 40 minutes for them to go to sleep. The next night we did longer intervals - 7 minutes, 10 minutes, 15 minutes. We did that for a couple of nights, then went to only going in every 20 minutes. It took about a week before they were consistently going to sleep on their own without much of a fight. However, even now there are still nights that they cry and fuss and don't want to go to sleep, especially if they aren't feeling good, or their routine is off, etc. But for the most part, we rarely have to go in anymore - I only go in when their crying seems to warrant it (i.e., it sounds like they are scared, hurting, etc.). I've gotten pretty good at telling when they are just trying to resettle or fussing a bit and when they need us.

We then waited a month or so and tackled naps, too (which have always been harder for them).

Good luck in whatever you decide to do!

 

My oldest was 9 months old (we co slept until then). My oldest daughter was 9 months and then again at 10.5 months, she got really sick right after we did CIO the first time and ended up back in bed with us until she could breath properly again.

Twins, we did the first round at a little over 4.5 months, our dd was needing to be held to get to sleep all the time and I just couldn't do it. I did it similar to eagleswings, more of a modified CIO, I didn't just leave them alone. I keep going back in until they settle down. We had to do another round at about 7-8 months I think it was. Both times the first night was far worse, taking a couple hours for them to settle down. But it quickly got better and within 5-6 days they were going to sleep on their own.

 

That sounds more like something I would try, a modified CIO...I just don't know if I can handle hearing them cry and not go in there to comfort them. I talked to my husband last night and he is going to start going in to work a little later in the morning so he can help out more during the night. Our girl slept from 1am til 7:30am and our boy was awake most of that time! So luckily around 2:30am, he finally took him to our downstairs bedroom and kept him entertained so I could sleep. They are starting to sleep longer stretches at night, just not together If we DO try CIO without modifying it, I already told my husband I'll have to leave the house, or I'm going to be crying too!

On a side note, my parents and my in-laws each took a baby for the night, so I'm going to bed early and hopefully enjoy a full night's rest!!!

 

We did it when our twins were 4 months old. We had babies who would require us to hold them for 30-40 minutes just to fall asleep and woke several times a night. They also fought naps like crazy. We chose to do it early because they were so overtired and we felt we had no other choice. The first night they cried 30-40 min. Second night, maybe 15. Third night and on, about 5 minutes of whining and then fell asleep. What I discovered was that after they learned to fall asleep at bedtime, the night wakings became less and they went down easier. I would still nurse them if they woke overnight, but I could just lay them down afterward instead of holding them till they fell asleep again. Anyway, good luck. Remember that no one technique is the right way, the most important thing is to be consistent.

 

I did not start until my twins were a little over 5 months. I noticed that they woke up every singe night at the same time, drank very little, then went back to sleep. I tried CIO and it worked. Took about a week, but that's when they began to sleep through the night. Once that hurdle was over, then we started using it for naps...you know those days, they are dead tired but refuse to sleep. I guess ours was sort of modified CIO...they cried for about 10 minutes, if it got uncontrollable, then I went in, rubbed their backs, covered them up, never said a word, then left, and repeated this pattern until they finally slept. The naps were the worse and took the longest to really get under control. However, I will say that my girls have never been good sleepers. We had to do sticker charts and all kinds of craziness to get them to sleep through the night up until they were 5. Some kids just aren't good sleepers for whatever reason. I will say that what helped us more than CIO is a routine. We established it early and to this day they never argue about going to sleep and will often come and tell me when they are ready to go to bed. I think an excellent routine, coupled with CIO if necessary is way more effective.

 

We also started a modified CIO sometime around 8 months. We did our normal bedtime routine and into bed they went. If there was crying, I would wait 5 minutes before going in. I would comfort them in anyway they needed, including picking them up but I kept my visit very short and always said the same exact thing "settle down, it's time to go to sleep." After a short visit I left the room. If crying continued, I would wait 10 minutes before going in and doing the same exact settling routine. I would increase the crying time by 5 minutes every time. The longest this method ever took was up to 20 minutes of crying (which is 35 minutes start to finish). I did the same thing for night time wakings. It took about 4-5 days for this routine to initially work. We recently had to revert back to this with my 21 month son after he started being stubborn about going to sleep and it worked after only one day.

It was difficult listening to them cry (especially in the middle of the night) but having a consistent plan and allowing myself to calm them helped me get through it. We had really good luck with it!

 

We did modified CIO just like it was described by eagleswings, around 6 months, but only for naps. After about 7-10 days of naptime CIO, they both started to sleep well at night also. For some reason, after the naps resolved, they slept well at night too, without CIO and they slept through the night around that time also. Unfortunately after they turned 1, Vanessa's sleep became weird again, we blamed it on teething a lot, but hey, you'll get there when you get there . Good luck with them, I hope you rested while the babies were away.

I wanted to add the first 2-3 days of naptime CIO were rough, but after that they would only cry for 5-10 min and then go to sleep, but they were in different rooms. At night they sleep in the same room, and after the first few days of naptime CIO they started to fall asleep right after we put them to bed - drousy but awake. We never rocked them to sleep, but I did walk around with Vanessa especially while she had colick issues.

 

We did it when they were 5.5 months. The first 2 nights, we let them cried about 10 mins then we came in, calmed them down, but never picked them up, just talked to them, patched their butts, then started CIO over. But then they got smart. They knew we would come in if they cried and not give up. So it didnt work out. Finally, I just let them cry. The longest time was 45 mins. Average was about 5- 20 mins. However, i stayed outside the door to listen to them. If i heard they screamed so much and about to puke, I came in. it took about 4-5 nights, then thats it. However, we repeated CIO many times in first yr, after they got sick, their schedules messed up,teething,.. And we had the rule: no more rock to sleep!!!

I have to tell you that CIO was one of my best decisions for my family and me. We all had so much sleep, rest, and energy next day. And they started sleep through the night around 6-7 months (I dont remember exactly). I know many parents against CIO. Its hard to hear them cry for 30 mins. But actually, crying is not bad for them. Its good for their lungs lol. My friends daughter is over 4. But her mom has to be in her roon at nap and bed time. Well, its just parent choice. Nothing is right or wrong here. But there is noway it would happen in my house. We cant afford that method. My husnads coworkers complainted about their kids as well. They still need to be rocked to sleep at ages of 3,4,5. Its hard for my husbands coworkers to believe that my kids just go to bed on their own since they were 6 months old.

When we converted crib to toddler beds at 18 months, we had sleep issues again for 3 months. OMG, it was horrible horrible 3 months. We had to stay in their room until they fell asleep nap and bed time. It sucked so bad!!! But now, everytime is back to normal routine. They go to their room at nap time, play then fall asleep, sleep for a 2-3 hour straight. Its just so beautiful. I monitor them through an ip cam. So I know what they do in there behind the door lol.

If you decide to do CIO, just be tough and stick with it. They will cry and fight it. But as long as they know the rules, game over, you win!

 

We actually started with out girls at 4 months. Mainly because by the time they were 5 months i was back at work and really needed them to be in their own cribs and not in our room any longer. The first coupld of nights was hard. They cried the first night the longest which was 20 minutes then for the next two nights they cried 15 and continued to cry less each night until finally they just went right to bed. Setting up a routine was key for us though. SO they would usually get a bath then a bottle and then bed. They are now 8 months old go to bed the same night every night and we usually don't have any problems. They every now and again will cry for a max of ten minutes but I litterally will go to another part of the house where i can't hear them. If in 20 minutes they are still crying then i know something is wrong and will usually go in and pick them up but im a big softy and really dislike them crying. My husband is more of a hard A$$ and doesn't mind the crying he walks outside usually when they cry after being put in bed. We never let me son cry it out though and he is three and sleeps in his own bed and has slept in his own bed since 7 months old. I think if YOU don't have high anxiety about them sleeping somewhere else THEY wont have it either. Good luck and just remember its not bad to let them cry but you have to follow your instinct. =)

 

Thanks so much for sharing your experiences everyone. Right now we're basically doing the "console and check" method. I TRY not to pick them up but comfort them every so often when they're crying. Our girl is much better than our boy! lol...he is more needy and wants to be carried all the time. I'm starting a sleep log finally, so hopefully things go well with this method and we can avoid CIO, but if we have to, I'll try it.