? for SAHM

My twins are two years old and I have stayed home with them since they were born. I would love to stay home until they are in school but my friend said I should not be out of the work force that long. I was a supervisor at a bank before I had them and I loved my job. My dh and I are stationed in Germany right now and there are very few jobs that I can get that will cover the cost of daycare. I am so scared when I do go back to work that no one will hire me. I recently started taking some college classes and it is my goal to get my associate by the time we leave here, which will be in 3 and a half years. This way I am doing something to benefit myself and I can still stay home with my kids. Does anyone have any advice or insight on this? How long did you stay home? Thanks in advance.

Meredith

 

My twins are two years old and I have stayed home with them since they were born. I would love to stay home until they are in school but my friend said I should not be out of the work force that long. I was a supervisor at a bank before I had them and I loved my job. My dh and I are stationed in Germany right now and there are very few jobs that I can get that will cover the cost of daycare. I am so scared when I do go back to work that no one will hire me. I recently started taking some college classes and it is my goal to get my associate by the time we leave here, which will be in 3 and a half years. This way I am doing something to benefit myself and I can still stay home with my kids. Does anyone have any advice or insight on this? How long did you stay home? Thanks in advance.

Meredith

 

No advice or insight, per se, but I've heard that as long as you can demonstrate that you were doing "something" during the "blank spots" in your resume, that will help. For instance, I remember reading in _Resumes for Dummies_ many moons ago that you could list the skills you gained in parenting (conflict resolution, travel planning, purchasing supplies, meeting and event planning). Maybe somebody has something better to add? Good luck!

 

I see it differently, to me you were doing something, you were raising your children. I took seven years off while I took care of Matthew and then the twins, the day the twins started kindergarten was the day I went back to work. Yes, it's only part time but I am working again and it was the only job I applied for and I got it. There was one question as to why I wasn't working for the seven years and the answer was to raise my children. I also had a good, steady job before I had kids that I was there since I graduated from high school, I was there for 14 years, so I'm sure that helped too.

Good Luck!

 

I am not planning on going back to work until the twins are in school. At that point, I will have been out of the "work force" for almost 8 years.
I personally don't think I will have a problem when I go back to work. I also had a stable work history before I decided to stay at home and if a company won't hire me b/c I took that time off to raise my children, then I don't want to work for them anyway. Someone who doesn't respect the sacrifices I made for my family doesn't deserve my loyalty!
There are days I fantasize about going back to work, but I still wouldn't trade seeing them grow up for anything. I know there are some people who are better moms because they work (or HAVE to work), so if you WANT to go back to work, then go back! If it is simply because you are afraid you will be unhirable (is that even a word???) in a few years, I wouldn't give into the pressure. After staying home for the last two years, you may regret it.
Do what you think is best, not what your friend says!

 

Hi. I work at an employment agency and I think the college courses are a great way to demonstrate a continuity and dedication to the skills specific to your field while you are home with your children. As for re-entering the workforce, there are so many factors that come into play. It will depend on the local economy...the number of skilled individuals in your field, number of scheduled retirements etc. Maybe do some research on-line and try to get a feel for the situation.

In our city (Northern community, shifting economy), the reality was that I had a good full-time permanent position that I liked with excellent benefits, 4 weeks holidays and fairly flexible work hours. If I had given this up, I know there would be no way I would re-enter the workforce at near the level I had been and there was the a good chance I would never re-gain a similar position. I took my one year maternity leave and now the grandparents care for our children in our home. I'm not a career driven person, but my choices were going back to work or having DH work two jobs and never be home and never see me or the kids and I didn't want to live like that.

It sounds like you are not in the position to return to work right now anyway. Just relax about that situation. My advice would be to continue to take courses that will make you more marketable when you do return to work and enjoy your time at home with the children.

 

Personally I don't ever plan to go back to work. These kids will only be small once...I can't do it over again. I plan to stay home with them till they leave my nest (I will be homeschooling them too). Maybe I will never go back. It's a sacrifice finalcially, but well worth it. I can't give advice about staying out of the work force and the affect that might have on your future emplyment. It's not something I think about. I hope that you find what is right for you.

 

I don't plan on going back to work until the boys are in kindergarten. I haven't worked since I was 28 weeks pregnant. I do have a part-time job on base at the local church doing child care during the many services they have during the week and on Sunday. I can take the boys to work with me and I get paid for it so that is the perfect job for me. I am also going to begin taking college class after we move plus the next duty station has the same program on base too. I think that the college courses will help and then the explanation that you were raising your kids as well. They are only little once.

 

quote:
my friend said I should not be out of the work force that long.

no offense but I think it is terrible that your friend is not more supportive of you (and all women) and clearly doesn't see the extremee importance of staying home to raise your children.

I am a SAHM who is actively involved in my kids school cvolunteering in the class and out and getting expereince doing things I wo uld never have had if I didn't volunteer. Experience comes in many places and employers know that.

 

I agree with pp. They are only this age once. When they go to school I will likely get a part-time job. I'd like to be home when they get out of school. I'm not worried about getting back to the workforce.

 

quote:
I am a SAHM who is actively involved in my kids school cvolunteering in the class and out and getting expereince doing things I wo uld never have had if I didn't volunteer. Experience comes in many places and employers know that.


Excellent point!

The only way I can see some validity in what your friend said is if you're in a profession in which the technology changes rapidly, such as medicine or computers or something. But even then, if you have a background in it and you keep yourself educated about your field, it shouldn't take long to get back up to speed when/if you decide to go back.

 

I've been a SAHM for over 10 years now. I plan on staying home with my kids until the twins are in school and even then it will be part time. I was a latch key kid most of my childhood and would like to be home when my kids get home from school. That said, I've done lots of volunteer work through various organizations (Girl Scouts, military stuff etc...) and I've gone to school here and there. I plan on going back to school and taking more classes as time and money become available. I want to contribute to the household finances but I can't do that and afford daycare at this point. Dh and I talk about my going back to work in a few years but it's always dependant on where the Navy sends him. When he gets back from this cruise I may try to get a part time position at a grocery or department store in the evenings just to bring in a little extra cash. I honestly don't care if I am "starting over" in the workforce every couple of years. This time I have with my kids is far more important to me right now. With Dh being gone, the kids need me with them more than ever. We try to have it where one of us is with them as much as possible.

 

I don't plan on going back to work unless it was something part-time one or two days a week. I taught school for 9 years prior to having kids. I've been a SAHM for almost 5 years now. Both of my parents worked. I was a latch key child and was by myself most of the time growing up. I will be there for my kids. I plan to be really active in their school helping out where I'm needed and in their classrooms. There are so many things that I want to teach them about. I want to be home to be able to do that for them.

 

I have been a SAHM mom since Sept '02. I have no immediate plans to go back to work. We might have more kids and I know that I at lwast want to stay home until all of my kids are in school full-time. I was an Accounting Manager before the kids and I have no desire to go back to work in that capacity again. Maybe some day I'll work myself back up to that but my focus has shifted. I can only see myself working part-time in the future.

 

Thanks girls I really appreciate all of the advice, I guess I am just kind of scared of what the future holds (my dh tells me I worry way too much). I feel very blessed that I have been given this opportunity to stay at home with my children and I want to cherish every second of it. Thanks again

Meredith

 

Look at it this way....there will always be jobs...your kids are young only once..enjoy it for as long as you can...you broke into your career somehow..and you will be able to break into it again...I think your friend is worrying you unnecessarily...