Fits if he isn't first...

For the most part ds is pretty easy going. There are times though, that he just throws a fit. Those times are when he wants to do something first or be the only one to do something. For example, turning off the light (wall fixture) before bedtime or turning the tv on or off. IF dd is trying to be helpful by handing him his milk, he will throw a fit because he wanted to grab it himself, or he just doesn't want the milk. He'll throw a fit if you go upstairs ahead of him, even though you didn't know he wanted to go upstairs.
How do we handle those fits? Ignore them? I've tried talking to him and trying to explain that he can't be first or do everything himself. He has basically no vocabulary so him telling me anything is a mute point. Thanks...

signed:
Beyond Frustrated.

p.s. This has been an ongoing issue for awhile now, but it is probably getting to me before because I am sick with a head cold :sick: and haven't had much sleep in the past three nights.

 

I have been having a bad day; so you might not want my reply, but I would just ignore it. If he doesn't get to turn the light switch off or grab his own milk and he throws a fit, let him. Not to sound cold, but he is only throwing a fit to get his way. If you give in, he will know it works and continue. Nip it in the bud early on.

 

I agree with Song. I would ignore it.

 

Yep, ignore it. And he should grow out of it. Ben did!

 

I agree with everyone else... don't give in if he is having a fit. He will just learn that fits work.

I would also like to add this... if he waits his turn nicely, give him a little praise. And let him hear you compliment his sister when she is being patient. (for several years I taught 3 year old preschool... it will turn quickly into "see how good I'm waiting!") I know it sounds a little corny, but it works!

Good luck!

Helen

 

I think he is telling you something. Jon used to have temper tantrums or get violent with other children--not horrible, but we finally figured out after a speech eval that he has an expressive language delay. Because he was unable to tell us what he wanted, he would act out. I was going to ask how his speech was, and you answered before I could ask.

I would start by giving him a choice, like would you like to turn out the light tonight?, and then go with his answer. You will probably find that by limiting his response, you will help the behavior. I would also look into a speech eval ASAP. His age is tough, because he is young enough for EI, but about to age out, but not quite old enough to be on the radar for preschool. If your insurance covers it, I would get a private eval and go from there.

 

QUOTE(sharongl @ Feb 23 2008, 08:16 AM) [snapback]636955[/snapback]
His age is tough, because he is young enough for EI, but about to age out, but not quite old enough to be on the radar for preschool. If your insurance covers it, I would get a private eval and go from there.

Thanks Sharon (and everyone!) He has been having weekly speech sessions with a speech pathologist since last October. Lately he has been saying more sounds and a few new 'words.' Thanks!

 

Jackie, then I would definately say that the fits are the result of the lack of speech. One trick that Jon's teacher had used was to have a snack drawer for each child, and they had to verbally say which snack they wanted--there were only up to 5 in the drawer, so it wasn't a huge selection, but encouraged a verbal choice. I know it is really frustrating, but given his speech issues, I really wouldn't ignore him--he is using the fits to tell you what he can't otherwise communicate. Very frustrating, I know!