Finding Joy in the Journey

I recently read a qoute about how life should be enjoyed and not just endured. I am sure all of us can realate that the first year with a new baby or babies can be really stressful. I am curious how each of you find joy and enjoy your journey through life?

 

I think enjoying life and enduring it goes hand it hand. Not everyday can be a barrel of fun. Reality is we work hard to raise happy, healthy children and that in itself brings joy but, it is hard work and somedays it can be just an endurance race to survive. I enjoy the life I have and I am blessed to have my family, a home, stable careers and incomes. But, I won't lie some days I am just barely making it through and praying for bedtime to come so I can have a little peace. Selfish I know. :blush:

 

I am definately trying to enjoy the twins more than "survive them" because I think I was on survival mode most of my daughters first year of life and now I realize I should have stopped and just enjoyed her as an infant more. I dont stress about nearly as much stuff as I did with her. I really am loving being a twin mom.

 

After years of infertility, for my 35th birthday two years ago, my DH gave me an engraved bookmark with a quote by Anais Nin: ""Don't let one cloud obliterate the whole sky." I have tried to live that way even before we were blessed with our babies. Now, on fussier days, I often have to repeat it over and over again until one of them smiles and my heart melts with joy again.

 

Take a deep breath, and sigh out loud... it really helps!

If that doesn't help, cry...

All of the bad things can get you down, but seeing them do that one amazing thing makes you forget the bad. I know my guys were a HANDFUL when they were born, but as soon as they began hitting their milestones, and cooing, and smiling... my heart was just so content... it made everything better.

 

I always take lots of pictures, it makes me smile so big to look back at all those pics from various stages we all went thru.
Each day I make sure to remind myself to get on the floor and just be silly with them.

 

I'm still working on this, I must admit. With my son, I was so busy enduring his colic and the challenges of new motherhood that I felt as though I awoke one day and those precious baby days were all gone and here was this toddler. I felt so sad that I'd "missed" it even though I was there every single day of his life. I longed for the opportunity to really savor the baby days again...that's when we conceived the twins .

When I learned I was pg with twins (as opposed to a singleton) one of the reasons I was so emotional about the news was that I feared I'd miss the precious details of the baby stage yet again since I'd be so overwhelmed by it. To a certain extent that's true. My babies will be 6 months in a few short weeks and I can't believe it. I look at photos of their first days and it's like they're different people -- I can't even remember what it was like to have such tiny babies in the house!

I try to remind myself to slow down and just "be" with them but it's hard. Life stuff kinda gets in the way but at least I'm aware of it, taking lots of pictures, creating scrapbook layouts to capture what they say / do / what they're like to try and keep it all as fresh as I can.

 

I am trying so hard to enjoy this time in all my children's lives, because time goes by so fast. It is proving to be a little harder than I expected it to be. Everyday isn't peaches n cream, but I try my hardest to make everyday count.

 

QUOTE(AppleDumplings @ Jun 28 2007, 12:43 AM) [snapback]309760[/snapback]
After years of infertility, for my 35th birthday two years ago, my DH gave me an engraved bookmark with a quote by Anais Nin: ""Don't let one cloud obliterate the whole sky." I have tried to live that way even before we were blessed with our babies. Now, on fussier days, I often have to repeat it over and over again until one of them smiles and my heart melts with joy again.



What a great qoute! Thanks for sharing.

 

Great topic!

I try to take time out every day and just *be with* the girls. I try not to think about the fact that there is laundry to do, bottles to prep, diapers to change, etc. I get down on the floor and play with them, or watch them play, or take picture/video of them playing. I also take time out each day to 'talk' to them. When I get home from work I'll pick each of them up and sit them on my knees facing me and we'll 'talk' about what they did while I was gone.

Even though they are a lot of work, I don't think of "work" as a bad four letter word. Everything I've accomplished in my life has been accompanied by a tremendous amount of work and that is why I appreciate the things I have and the things I've done. I hope this makes sense since I'm working on very little sleep.. M decided to wake up every 2 hours last night... not sure why! -Leighann

 

I think the thing that helped me enjoy the babies and not just endure them was that I have older kids. I know all to well how quickly the first year flies by.

 

What a wonderful topic. This week has been really trying for me. DS has had the worst week ever and it has been wearing me out especially since DH has been working 12-14 hour days and only gets home in time for baths and bedtime.
On days (weeks in this case) where I don't think I can stay sane I remind myself that I am finally living my dream. I have wanted to be a mommy for years. I dealt with infertility and treatments to have these babies and I am just blessed to even have any children much less twins.
I also think about the fact that these are probably the only children we will have so I better enjoy each moment because I won't have this chance again. God gave me two babies for a reason and I am trying to soak up every moment.

Thanks for reminding me of that today.

 

Nice post. Yes it is hard. With my DS I had horrible PPD, and had panic attacks when he was 2 years, so I am trying to "live in the moment" and not think about what is to come, I just enjoy the time right now. It does go so fast! This time around I am much happier and stronger.

 

When I look into my guys' eyes and see how much they absolutely adore me, I just let it wash over me and I savor it. I just think, right now they love me more than anyone else in the universe and nothing makes them happier than mommy's attention. In the blink of an eye they'll be teenagers who just grunt hello, won't want to talk and won't want to be hanging out with mom. Thinking like that helps me enjoy this time despite all the crying, poop, neediness and inability to clean my house or have a decent phone conversation!

 

What a great post!
I spent the larger part of my pregnancy afraid that the babies wouldn't make it or would be born with a whole number of problems so when things are "hard" now I think back to how truly difficult I though they would be and that puts things into perspective. These are such glorious being and I'm so privilidged to have them to take care of.
Taking some time to be in nature even if that means the back yard also helps me find more joy. Sometimes I will play music and jump around a bit as well. Laughing at myself usually works to lighten things up. I laugh at how serious I sometimes think things are. Meditating has helped me take things one moment at a time and I can deal with most things if I think of them as just one moment.
I try to keep in mind thatpart of joy is also in difficulty or sadness. It's all life. If we can hold life in equanimity... now that is joy that cannot be taken away by circumstances.

 

great topic. I've been thinking a lot lately about how i feel like as a twin mom, i miss out on a lot and don't get to enjoy this time with my girls as much as I would if I only had one baby. I try to really enjoy the calm times, or when I get some one on one time with one girl or the other. I feel like i spend so much time trying to make sure their needs are taken care of that I can't really just stop and smell the roses. I remind myself daily what a blessing they are, and when i get those great groggy smiles every morning, and when I get home from work, or a huge laugh I really savor them. I always tell myself, got only gives us what we can handle, so he must really have a lot of confidence in me!

 

What a great post! I love it!
Even though life with twins is VERY challenging, I find joy in the "surprises" - things my boys do that totally catch me off guard, like rolling across the room, making new sounds and gestures etc. That makes me very happy and is a break from the mundane/crazy!

 

When it's really tough - tell yourself it will get better.
When it's really great - tell yourself it will get even better.
And try to tell others how you feel - even when it's tough, great or somewhere in between.

 

When I'm stressed or just feeling low, I sit on the floor in the playroom amidst all the toys and clutter and wallow in my girls - slobbery kisses, sticky hands and lots of big, big hugs bring joy everytime.

Thanks for the reminder.