Feeling a little guilty about extending their Christmas break

We're taking the girls to Disney World the first week of January. It'll be a Christmas surprise. They have been asking for a while now and this just worked out to be the best time to go. We wanted to go last summer but found out 2 close family members (my mom and SIL) have stage 4 cancer so we didn't travel so we could be around to help them with what we could. We want to spend Christmas and New Years with them, just in case. Add to that their other grandmother is in hospice care, we have no idea how much longer. We got some great news for my mom at her last appointment and she is only on a light chemo until January and then we reevaluate for surgery. We feel like we can't wait until the summer or spring break to make the trip because we just won't know how everyone will be doing. So we'll be gone from the 3-10, and they start back on the 8th. They will miss the first 3 days back (weds - fri) and they will be unexcused absences...3 is the most they are "allowed" before the district takes action (they send a letter and make you go to a class on truancy). They are above average students with straight A's and generally great at school. I keep going back and forth on feeling guilty. Would you? My husband has no problem with it.

 

I would feel guilty as well, but I would still do it.
 
I'm a teacher and we plan on taking our kids to Disney one of these years. We would probably go in February and all of us would miss several days. Sometimes you just have to do what is best for your family. You have a lot of factors to take into consideration and it sounds like you made the best decision for your family! Go and enjoy!

 

I took mine out for an entire week last year to go to Disney World.  ardon: 
 
It was worth it! One day was Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, so one was a holiday. But the other 4 went against their absences. Then 3 weeks later we went to Tahoe for a week that they missed. (That was a bucket list wish of their grandfather, who did pass away less than 2 months later, so I will never regret that choice. He had all 11 of his grandchildren under 1 roof for the first time ever.)  I think sometimes life experience is must more important. 
 
Go for it and enjoy and let go of the guilt!! 

 

I would probably feel a smidge guilty but would do it anyway.  I would let the teachers know they won't be in class obviously.   My kids also get good grades and have good attendance so I would take them.  Plus that week will probably be less crazy than the week before.

 

I would not feel even one tiny bit of guilt.  Travelling, even to somewhere like Disney, is not only educational but builds important family memories and makes them more well rounded individuals.  Of course, we have no problem pulling them out of school here, there is no limit on unexcused absences and teachers are very supportive of students travelling, usually just sending along some work or having them write a journal while they are gone.  I have known families to take their kids out of school for 6 weeks for big trips with no problems.  It gets more difficult in high school for them to miss class, just because there is so much work to make up, but through grade 7, no problem.

 

 
 
This is how I feel.  We took our oldest out to go to disney in feb a few years ago, my parents were coming down to visit us and we went as a family. 
 
We took the older 2 out of school for 3 days last fall to go to the beach the beginning of september, the only time we could find campsite reservations, the summer was booked up.
 
Next fall we are taking them out for nearly 10 days to go to my sisters wedding.  My oldest will be in 7th grade, my second will be in second grade, and my twins will be in Kindergarten.  It's a 4 day drive there, and 4 days back, and we are spending 4 days with my family.  They will miss about 10 days of school.  We can't afford to fly so we will be driving.  I do feel guilty, but I plan to let the teachers know as soon as school starts, and then remind them the week before so they can send any homework with us if they want to.
 
I had to miss my little bro's wedding because the twins were 5 months old (and it was a 5 day drive to his house), and my other sister is nowhere near getting married, and my 3 youngest are flower girls and ring bearer in this wedding, so we are definitely going.
 
Life isn't just about school.  Don't get me wrong, school is important, but it's not the be-all/end-all of things.  Life is meant to be experienced too.  And sometimes experiences don't always fall during school vacations or summer holidays

 

 
This.  (Really well said!)  If it makes you feel any better, we are taking the kids out for five days in November to go to Disney.  We told the teacher the first day of our plans, and she really was very supportive.  We plan to do all work, so they won't fall behind.  But don't feel guilty.   Your kids will only be young once.  Enjoy the time being together and don't feel guilty about it!

 

Honestly, no.  I wouldn't take my kids out for Disney (or any other vacation).  That will be the first of the semester with everything new being introduced.  They will miss all the introductory material.  They'll likely miss the start of projects in art and be behind or new games in pe.   I also figure that if I want my kids to value their education, I need to treat it like a priority.  
 
 
Marissa

 

 
I agree with this. Now, I'm a bit of an hypocrit I guess because I took my kids off school for a week in April for Disney, but it was in May, just 3 weeks before the end of school, and they were in preschool, where there wasn't any attendance policy either. But school is important and should be treated as such, IMO.

 

My girls missed a week of school last year when we went to the Caribbean a week after Easter break. I didn't feel guilty at all because like others said there is more to life than what you learn in school. I value school a lot (loved it so much I kept going until I got my phd), but some experiences are worth the time out of school. If yours are doing above average already, and you have time to work with the school so they don't miss anything (they can do work before you go), I don't think there is anything wrong with it.

 

I would take my kids out of school for some trips but not others.  Vacation to another country or a family event such a wedding would rank high on my list, but an amusement park would not.  But that's just my personal list and it may well change in the future.

 

I got a truancy warning for taking my DD to Disney.  She missed the two days before her Thanksgiving day break.  So she missed the Thanksgiving day movie marathon and party and a half day they did just so they could count the day.  I didn't care about the warning though because we were pulling her out of school at the end of that semester. 
 
My biggest concern with your current issue is that you will be at the max allowed number of unexcused absenses.  I think we were allowed 8 of them before you had to jump through hoops (and potentially go in front of the judge).  That means if anything else comes up, you are facing bigger trouble.

 

Thanks for all the replies. I believe life is more than school, and also that school is very important and should be taken seriously. If they were not doing well or in an upper grade where testing is involved I wouldn't even consider it. Under normal circumstances we would be taking this trip in the summer when I could have more time to plan and enjoy the magic of it. It's just very hard to plan for something even 3 months away when there is so much uncertainty revolving around your very close and terminally ill family members.

We don't have any out of town family and I can't see any reason to use those unexcused absences, not really even sure why they exist!

 

I already spoke with the teachers (who are fine with it) and they actually said the opposite. Those 3 days will be a kind of review after the long break so they can get back into the swing of things the following week.

 

Believe it or not Tina I actually thought of you! Oh how I wish we were in Canada! lol!

 

Yes, I'd do that - and my DH and I are both teachers. Sometimes life experiences and family togetherness trumps school. And it is a short week right after Winter break - I doubt they'll miss anything at all!

 

I know our school has in the school handbook that they will not give out make up work if children are taking a vacation during the school year.
So my decision would be based on the school policy honestly.  It sounds like your children's teachers are okay with it, so I would go.  And since things are up in the air with the health of some of your family, I would suggest to get vacation insurance in case something were to come up.  DH and I were supposed to go to Disney in Jan of 2010 and we had to cancel almost at the last minute because my father got suddenly very sick and eventually passed away (sorry to bring the room down), but we were fortunate, the airline was very good about us canceling and we were going with friends who had a time share and there was no penalty on their part for us not going.  I think the only money we lost out on was our Disney tickets,  I probably could have called but things were so hectic at that time, I just forgot.

 

 
It is only 3 days.  You spoke to the teachers, go enjoy your vacation.
 
I try not to take my girls out of school if I can help it.  With that said we did take them out for 2 days in K for BIL's wedding. In 1st grade I had a conference in WDW, so took them out for 2 or 3 days.  
I would not take them out for longer than 3 days though. I would not want to help them catch up on the work that they missed.
 
 

 
If you have disney tickets that are unused that you purchased for the trip, you can still use them when you go to disney.  People buy disney tickets in advance to save money on ticket increase

 

I'd have no problem doing it and have done it the 2 times we have gone to Disney.  Honestly, when I plan my Disney trips, I will not go during the summer or Spring break or Christmas break...way too crowded.  Both times we have gone we have pulled the kids out of school for 5 days.  The last time we went, 2 years ago, we went the week before Thanksgivnig and pulled the kids out for 5 days...Caroline was in 5th grade and Emilie and Trevor were in K. Our county does allow for 5 vacation days for families though, so it makes it a bit easier to do. :good:
 
I would do it again as well, however with Caroline now in middle school that makes it a lot tougher for her to miss a few days of school.
 
When I go to Disney I want to be sure I am going when it's not as crowded and can get a better deal honestly.  i will never go during a school break and fight the crowds. 

 

I took the girls out for 3 days right before fall break. One of the days was Columbus Day and the other was their class field trip so they really didn't miss anything

 

 I would do it and wouldn't feel one bit guilty. You need family and fun time. You won't be able to get this time back, but they will be able to make that work up. I say go and don't look back.
 

 

Our school is actually very accommodating of family vacations or ALEs - Alternative Learning Experiences.  I would do it, and not feel bad about it. They are very young, in the long run a few days of school won't make the least bit of difference. I don't think it shows your children that you don't value their schooling. You show that to them on a daily basis when you check their backpacks, review their homework, spelling tests, read with them, etc...

 

I work in education and I'm really pro-education and I wouldn't feel bad about that at all. I don't let my job define who I am or interfear with other parts of my life, so school should also not do that for my kids. If I would take time off work to do something, I wouldn't think twice about taking the kids out of school to do something.

 

Go and have fun! I am a teacher and am more than willing to take days off for a family vacation.

 

Both my parents are teachers and believe strongly in education.  I always appreciated that as much as they supported education, they always made family a priority.  It was a good lesson in balancing the important things in life.

 

I wouldn't feel an ounce of guilt. Your girls are extremely smart and have great grades to show for it. I don't think they'll have any problems making up any work they might miss. If their teachers are okay with it, then I wouldn't worry about it. Yes, education is important, but not at the expense of your family. You do what you need to do for your family. This is one of the many reasons why I homeschool. It gives us the flexibility we need in order to travel when it is convenient for our family with my husbands job. However, even if I didn't homeschool, we would take them out for something like what you are doing.

 

With everything you guys have been through recently, I wouldn't feel even the least bit guilty about it. Go, enjoy the time and let the girls make some memories. And, ditto what Sheryl said for sure!