Fear of stalking

I recently left an abusive relationship where I was virtually a prisoner, not let out of his sight very often, although it was verbal abuse, fear and manipulation that he used to keep me near, rather than physical force. I’ve been away from him for (timeframe removed by moderator), and after an initial police incident, things have been quiet, except (timeframe removed by moderator) he called me a few times from his landline, until I blocked him. I already blocked his mobile because of persistent calls. I don’t think he would physically restrain me if he found me, but I can’t be sure and I feel fearful. Even though I’m in a different county and he doesn’t know where I am, he could probably work it out if he was determined enough, which I fear he might become once he thinks he’s “given me space”.

Is there any kind of time frame, where abusers bide their time, until you think you’re safe and then start stalking, or does it tend to be straight away? I know it probably varies for different people, but I wondered if there are any similar patterns to stalking to help assess my risk?

 

I felt a lot more in control once I started learning how to look out for myself better. One thing you might want to look into is Executive protection courses. They’re not just for bodyguards—some cover everyday safety things that helped me feel less helpless and more prepared. I found even understanding small things like how to be aware of my surroundings made a big difference in my confidence.