Encouraging sibling relationships

I am desperately in need of some good resources..websites, books, etc. that help encourage sibling bonding and relationships... Do you have any input?? I know there is a book out there that people have raved about.. I searched the forums and couldn't find the name.. Thanks guys!

 

I read a book called Siblings Without Rivalry. It was pretty good. I plan to read it again when the boys are a little older. It has a lot of examples and pointers.

 

I think Siblings Without Rivalry is a great book but you probably won't find many practical ideas to use with your children yet, most of the examples use older children (3yrs+). It's still well worth reading when they're this young because it can affect the way you look at their arguments and the language you use in response, plus it never hurts to get into good habits early. It does also cover new babies and the tensions that can cause which I imagine would be useful to you, although again you may have to slightly adjust the language to account for how young your twins are.

At this age I think the best thing you can do for their relationship is to teach them generally about respecting other peoples feelings/property/personal space which I'm sure you're doing anyway (eg no hitting, use gentle hands/don't snatch toys/x doesn't want a hug just now). They are not even 2 so you really can't expect too much from them, they have not got the cognitive development yet to put themselves in anyone else's place or properly play together. Expecting a deep sibling bond is a bit much at this stage and them fighting a lot now doesn't mean they are going to grow up hating each other or never getting on.

ETA: If you can find a bit of time every week to spend some individual time with each you may find that useful too. Both in terms of giving you a break and setting up good habits as they get older. It doesn't have to be anything big or a long amount of time, it could just be that you take one of the twins to the store while their dad keeps the other two home and spends some time with the other twin while the baby naps. Then you have 10 minutes with the baby while the girls watch a cartoon.