Ive posted about MIL before and how she takes over when she visits. Now I´ve come to realise that DS seems to prefer being with her than me and it´s upsetting me. When she´s around, he ignores me & looks to her but when she´s not around Im the centre of his universe. You´d think he´d be like this with the carer but he isnt and he sees her every day. I guess I wouldnt mind as much if it were my own mother that he was like this with but it isnt. My mother lives in the UK. Yes, I guess you can call this jealousy but I guess that´s a mother´s privelige, isn´t it! Why is this bothering me so much? Anyone else deal with this?
I just dealt with this over the last week. We were up at our cottage not this past weekened but the weekend before. Dylan wanted to stay when we left to come home and I cried about it b/c it was 3 hours away. The fartherst I ahave even been. My mom and dad told me they would drop him off on the way home on Monday but that didnt happen he didnt want to come home. I went to pick him up on Wednesday and got his seat in the car and all his bags and at the last minute he changed his mind and ran back in the house. This is where I started thinking he likes them better then me. The next few days were super hard b/c he just didnt want to come home for anything. The weekend the same thing and I started to get very upset. I finally broke down yesterday and went to get him. I was so upset about this that i actually told my husband that she must have been doing things to make him like it there better. Now I realize how STUPID that was of me. Geez right?? Point to my story: Kids are going to LOVE something different and new just like we do. He does not love her more then you its just something new and different from the everyday so thats why. I think we as parents feel horrible and un-loved when we see the center of our world paying more attention to some one other then us. Trust me I did. Totally normal........ I hope (((HUGS)))!!!!!!!
Grandmas can be magical for kids! My kids will sometimes ignore me and prefer 'grandma do it' rather than me if she is around. I actually don't mind and take the time to relax a little and enjoy whatever else is going on. I do see where you are coming from, but trust me, there is no one like mommy. :hug:
I agree with Becky, when my Mom is around my DS wants nothing to do with me or DH, he just wants his Nonna. He sees her twice a week and she loves every minute of it. Believe me, I know it's hard not to be jealous but I try to think of it as a little break. Hang in there!
QUOTE(nikki_0724 @ May 19 2009, 07:09 AM) [snapback]1319396[/snapback] Point to my story: Kids are going to LOVE something different and new just like we do. He does not love her more then you its just something new and different from the everyday so thats why. i think this is it exactly! my girls love love love when their grandma comes over & usually completely ignore me. i also try & see it as a chance to take a break & not be "in charge" for a couple of hours. :hug: it's not easy though.
I have TWO kids who seem to prefer spending time with Grandma over me. Enjoy the break! Like Becky said, there is no one like mommy!!!
:thanks: girls, you have made me feel SO much better! I guess Im just being silly and you´re right, grandmothers are magical. I have a very close realtionship with both my grandparents and I want the same for my kids. Its just she gets in the way of things sometimes. I do use it as a break but find it hard to deal with at the same time. Guess I have to accept I cant always be in control, right! :grouphug:
Add me to the list of having kids who prefer grandparents. Your MIL sounds a lot like mine, and it's very frustrating. What I kept/keep reminding myself of is, she will never be their "mother", only *I* can fulfill that roll! Grandma's are fun for a diversion, but I'll always be their mother! :wub: :hug:
