Dressing them for Special Occasions

I posted a few weeks ago about how my girls are very choosy about what they wear, and that I have them select their own clothes and they don't get breakfast until they are dressed. Which I think is pretty good for them.

Now, granted they totally look like bohemians in the way that they are dressed on most days -- because to them animal prints go with animal prints (even if one is a zebra and the other a leopard print), flowers go with flowers no matter what color, etc. And it's often cute, sometimes atrocious, but I don't really care.

EXCEPT if they have to go somewhere special. Yesterday, someone close to us got married. A small casual ceremony (but a WEDDING nonetheless) at town hall, and I was to be the witness. So I wanted the girls to look nice, selected nice skirts, shirts, tights and jackets for them. And we talked about it ahead of time. I thought all systems were go and they were excited. Didn't happen.

So...I'm getting long winded here. My QUESTION is...do you ever FORCE them to wear something they don't want to wear or do you allow them to dress like bohemians to special events? Isn't there a lesson to be learned that sometimes they have to dress how mommy wants them to dress? Is it okay to wrestle them into their clothes?

I ended up getting them to look like respectable little bohemians (see my new avatar, the jackets helped, they did resist them at first but they ended up liking the buttons...)

 

If it was special I would tell them that It was a special event and we have to wear special clothes not our regular clothes and if they still object I'd force them.

 

As of lately, we have not had any special events to attend that required dressing up. I think it may be difficult for me to "force" them to wear something that they didn't want to, they would kick up a huge fuss. I can barely get them to wear something other than the color "pink" lately. And I am also forced to dress them in alike outfits otherwise there is major jealously of who gets what shirt. It's insane, but I hope shall pass soon. When I want them to wear something, I try to make it seem like it's the best thing in the world to wear and tell them how great they will look in it etc.. most times a bit of coaxing will work, for mine anyway.

Lately, I've been telling myself "To pick my battles" otherwise every nuance of the day would be a struggle. I think you did fine, the pic is cute. Now if they were the "flower girls" that would of been a different story and then I would force them to look adorable. LOL

Ahhh, the joys of raising twin 2 year olds, right?

 

My Michael is adamant about picking out his own clothes. We have had some battles lately especially church and school. Only because he insists on wearing short sleves and it is cooler in those places and I want him to wear long sleeves.

It is horrible....I feel your pain, but yes I do force them to wear things they don't want to for special occasions.

 

Usually "yes" for special ocassions, the ocassion really being about once a month to great grandma's house and she likes them to dress the same and be dressed I guess "pretty" so just say lets do this for grandma, they usually comply although they are 3 1/2 so a bit older.

Other than that they pick they're own clothes out. Usually though so I can keep it half decent, I give them just 2 choices, works most of the time.


amanda (jessica and jorja 3)

 

My oldest is a "clothes nazi!" He has to pick out his clothes and will pitch a fit if he does not get to wear what he wants. It is really our only behavior issue with him, but I have learned to work with it. If I want him to wear something, I don't give him a choice. I say, "This is what you are wearing to _____. You may lay out what you want to change into when we get home." This has worked very well for us for a very long time. If I want him to wear something specific, I make it a statement, not a question and let him decide for when we get home. Our difficulty now is that he has to pick out his brothers clothes so that they "go with" his. I have fixed this by waiting to get them dressed until he is at school. Needless to say, this whole issue drives dh CRAZY!!!!!

 

My girls have been dressing themselves since about 2 and they pick out their own clothes. Most days they are like yours if it's pink it matches and flowers it matches. For special occasions I do pick out their clothes and if they give me a fit I bargen with them. If they put on these clothes now when it's over they can wear whatever they want or if it's something they have to stay in for a while I will let them bring something they pick in the car with them to play with (it is not aloud to leave the car). Usually they will go along with it. Since I have doing this for a while now with them if I pick something out for them and say they have to wear it they usually don't put up a fight.

 

My girls still dont seem to mind what I dress them in.

 

My girla don't usually mind whta they wear... that being said...when there IS a diagreement about their clothes, I give them choices...all of which are acceptable in my eyes, yet they get to pick what they wear. I always try to give them options...just make sure the options are ones that YOU choose. Hope that Helps. =)

PS No. I would not let them look poorly for a special event. When it comes down to it, they need to obey and respect authority.

 

My dd was pretty picky about clothes. I never let any of my kids leave the house looking a total mess or totally unmatching. For a special event, I would give her 2 choices of mom approved outfits to wear. That way she is still deciding what to wear and they are still appropriate for the occasion.

 

They both love to dress up so special events or holidays have never been an issue here. Kelly is very picky about her day to day clothes sometimes though. She usually likes pink or purple and some days she'll fight me if I pick out another color for her. I will give her a choice when it comes to that.

The biggest thing for us is for their dance class they have to wear a special leotard with white tights and their hair has to be off their face. They both tell me that they don't want their hair up usually every week. I just tell them that this is the rule and they have to have their hair up to be able to dance.

So, yes, there are times when I insist that they have to dress a certain way and there is no room for argument.

 

My oldest DD loves to pick out her own clothes too. I usually pick out 2 outfits and let her pick which of those she likes best. That works most of the time. I really have issues with her and shoes! She insists on wearing her keds to church, it really stresses me out. We argue about it every Sunday!

 

If it is a special occasion , like a wedding , pictures , or something of that naure, the girl will wear what I tell them to, sometimes they do not like it but , there are times where my decsion over rules their's. lol I am picky when it comes to things like that, and I think they have figured that out about me

 

In our process of "picking" out clothing I have tried to work on selling the clothes if they pick strange things or things that don't match. Thus far it has worked. Same with times they need to dress nice... I "sell" the outift. Sounds strange but I have always tried to give as many choices as possible. Which undies, which socks, which tights. If possible try to show two dresses or perhaps the coat to them. Have had very few battles and usually things somewhat match. Have been teaching if they pick a printed top then solid color bottom or printed pants them solid shirt. Another choice we started quite a while ago that sounds funny when I ask is "would you like to wear cotton pants or jeans?" They now know what that means... stretchy type cotton pants or jeans, sometimes I throw in Tan pants and those are just basic kahki type. Just my way of trying to show them how to match but have choices too. I have also learned what they prefer... like Nora has started to prefer sweaters and cardigans so I show her the choices.

Just our system but it seems to work. Oh and the other thing is they have a big closet with bars to hang things up at their level. So I put things in an order that works. All shirts together, solids together, busy shirts together. Pant area with solids, jeans and cotton pants in their area. Seems to help and let's them view everything. I also have some outfits in an area too that they sometimes pick and that way they know the shirt will match the pants as they come together on the hanger.

Good luck-
Kristi

 

My oldest does pick out her clothes. There have been times when I've had to steer her in a different direction for one reason or another, like if she wants to wear a dress on PE day. But for special occasions, yes I would tell them they need to dress up and would give 2 options if available, if not I'd have to force them to wear the fancy clothes. I would not let my child wear something casual just because they wanted to wear it to a special/fancy occasion. They need to know that sometimes we have to dress up.

 

Marieber just wanted to say. You always sound like an awesome mom in your posts. Your girls are so pretty!!!

 

Before I got pregnant I had a converstation with a friend, saying I really wanted a boy, because what would I do if I got a "froo froo" girl? Well, I got two!

My girls love special occasions. The love dressing up, they beg me to let them wear ruffly dresses every day. I prefer that they don't.

But what I do about letting them choose, is I let them choose one thing, like a pair of pants or a sweater, then I pick out what goes with that, so they choose and they match. If they choose a pair of pants, I might pull out two sweaters each for them to choose from. That way we are all happy.

 

quote:
Originally posted by *Lori*:
Marieber just wanted to say. You always sound like an awesome mom in your posts. Your girls are so pretty!!!



Aw, thanks so much, Lori!

And right back at you for sure!

However, you haven't updated the picture of the boys for so long -- would love to see a recent photo of your handsome guys!