Dr Won't Schedule Delivery Date

Okay, okay I know that with twins anything can happen and my dr. is telling me that I can go into labor anytime between 34-37 weeks. In fact they told me they won't let me go past 37 weeks but they will not say anything about the labor except we will see. 37 weeks is the first week of October but they expect me to "go" before that???!!!!!

Now they are both head down and they say I will push them out and I expressed my wishes that I prefer not to. But I keep asking the different dr's I see and they all say that it is best. Well, everyone is different and has different wishes and mine is c-s. I know the pros and cons to both labors and still want the c-s. They just don't want to listen.

I told her, I have heard that one can be born with no complications and the second one can have complications and they will need to do an emergency c-s and both in one day is crazy. She said that rarely ever happens.

I am grateful for two babies and I will be more grateful once they are born healthy but I am just venting I guess. I also know that it is out of my control and the dr's have our best interest in mind and that one day of pain is nothing compared to my 5 years of infertility and that I could get there and they could still wind up doing the c-s afterall but .....I don't know....maybe just getting anxious since I am such a planned out person......

Any ideas?

 

It's normal to be anxious, especially if you are a planned out person (I am that way too). I sort of share your frustration.
My doctor's office has told me that they will deliver vaginally as long as Baby A is head down and the last one I saw told me he is an expert in delivering breech babies, so if he is one there when I deliver and Baby B is breech, it will still be a vaginal delivery. I know he was trying to reassure me with his expertise, but it just freaked me out.
My doctor's office will not commit to a delivery date, due date or when I should go out of work, so I feel like my life is up in the air for the next couple of months because anything could happen! The closest I can get a due date out of them is "sometime between 12/8 and 1/8" and I don't know what to tell my boss about work. Very frustrating.
I guess we both just have to hang in there and buckle up for the ride

 

Huh, that's odd. My doctors were pushing c-section from the minute I told them it was twins!!! (it so happens, I agreed with them and decided on a c-section on my own)

Why won't they consider a c for you if you have requested it?

 

I feel the same way as you. My OB office is telling me they can come anytime. They wont give me a definate answer though when they will pull the babies out if they dont come on their own. I just know God is not going to let me go too long though b/c I am already uncomfortable. I can not imagine another 9 weeks till my due date. I am already having to take it easy all day. It is very very frustrating not knowing or at least having a goal in site.

 

All I have learned during this process is that things can change very quickly, which is why they don't like to schedule things until the very end. I went from the doctor saying I was doing great and would make it to 38 weeks a week ago (when my cervix was long and closed), to be 2cm dilated and effacing and the doctor saying she didn't think I would make it to 36. I know it is hard when there is no end in sight, I really hit a wall around the 30 week mark and thought I wouldn't be able to do it. I feel a little better now b/c I know no matter what, these babies will be here in 4 weeks. The only advice I have is just to keep your spirits up, and know that they are closely monitoring you and if anything were to go wrong with you or the babies, they would deliver right away, but the longer you can keep them in, the better.

As far as delivery options, my Baby A is head down and my Baby B tranverse, they said it would depend on who was on call when I delivered but they prefer to deliver Baby A head down and then try to turn Baby B or do a breech delivery vs. c-section. I think it depends on the practice, but in this part of the country I think they are trying to get away from c/s unless they are absolutely needed b/c they have found that although the c/s rate has gone drastically up, the birth complications rate has stayed about the same.

Good luck to you.

 

My doc didn't schedule until 36 weeks (at 38 weeks) for an induction ... so much can happen, so it doesn't make sense to schedule too early.

BTW, I am a planner too, and I had 2 vaginal deliveries. I would never choose a c/s. Have faith in your doctor and discuss and explain your point of view and fears. Hopefully you can work it out, but a vaginal delivery is not bad at all and very very doable with twins as well. I wouldn't have done it any other way (my baby B was born by breech extraction).

 

I'm not trying to poo-poo your point of view or anything, but if both babies, or even just Baby A is head down, then there really is no reason to do a scheduled c-section. My doctor did go ahead and schedule one because both babies were breech, and she wanted to reserve the OR just in case they didn't turn, which they didn't. So, I did end up with a c-section. If everything is going fine with your pregnancy, then why would they induce or deliver before you go into labor?

I guess I was the opposite in that I very much wanted to have an unmedicated, natural childbirth and let the babies come when it was time.

 

You know, it really bugs me that you are getting grief for your choice of having a c-section.

To the above posters who are giving her grief over it: I'm a twin. I was born vaginally, but before my brother was born, things went very, very badly. He almost died, my mom almost died, and their lives were saved by a c-section. C-Sections can save lives and I have a mother today because of it.

So many things can happen in a delivery room, and twin deliveries are very unpredictable. If the original poster feels this is best for her and her babies, who are you to tell her otherwise?

 

QUOTE(ladybenz @ Aug 23 2007, 11:21 AM) [snapback]376792[/snapback]
You know, it really bugs me that you are getting grief for your choice of having a c-section.

To the above posters who are giving her grief over it: I'm a twin. I was born vaginally, but before my brother was born, things went very, very badly. He almost died, my mom almost died, and their lives were saved by a c-section. C-Sections can save lives and I have a mother today because of it.

So many things can happen in a delivery room, and twin deliveries are very unpredictable. If the original poster feels this is best for her and her babies, who are you to tell her otherwise?


Yes, c-sections can save lives and there are situations where it is necessary, as in your case. I had a c-section because it was necessary. My babies probably wouldn't be alive either. Ainsley was footling breech which is a very dangerous position for vaginal delivery. I'm not saying people shouldn't have one, just stating why her doctor probably doesn't want to schedule one when as of right now, there is no reason.
FWIW, Ainsley nearly died even with a c-section. Long story, I won't bore you.

 

I am with you 100% that I would rather have a planned c than end up having a vaginal delivery for A and a c for B! In fact, I keep talking to one of my OBs about it. She is the one doc in the practice who is "allowed" by her malpractice insurance to deliver vaginally if A is head down and B isn't. The other two OBs can only deliver vaginally if both are head down.

Anyway, I understand your desire to plan. I'm the same way. And the idea of a planned c-section is heaven to me, because then I can plan for it. EXCEPT that it then occurred to me that the planned c-section date is just a goal. And if I go into labor before then, it becomes an unplanned (emergency?) c-section. Once I realized that, I just decided to say my new mantra. "It's out of my control. Whatever happens, happens."

I also went through years of infertility before I had my dd and then another year before this pregnancy. When you've been through what we've been through, you have to remember you can do anything! So whatever does happen, you'll be fine.

 

I know just how you feel. I wanted an exact date and an end in sight. I am a planner so this drove me nuts!

My girls came unexpectedly when my water broke at 36 weeks so they come when they want to!

I had mine vaginally as is also what my doctor agreed with. We were in the operating room in case of an emergency. Turns out my Addison had a cord defect and was bleeding. Thank goodness I pushed her out quickly. Had we had an elective C-section this would never had been an issue as she would have been out in a minute or two. It would not have prevented her problem though.

This is a very personal decision that should be made with you, DH and doctor!

Good Luck!

 

It should your choice, because it is your body and babies. You probably wouldn't want to switch doctors at this point. I guess I would just try talking to docs again and let them know how you feel. I am opposite to you, I am hoping for vaginal birth. I had 2 and I know what to expect, but if I have to have a c-section it is for the best. I hope your doctor listens to you.

 

I think if you want a c-sec you should get 1, but maybe your dr thinks its to early to schedule. I had an induction at 36w 3d that was scheduled just 2 days before. I also delivered both vag. in the OR just in case. So it is very possible to not have an emergency c-sec. Good luck to you!

 

I think it should be a woman's choice how she would prefer to deliver. With medical advice..etc. but ultimately- if nothing goes wrong, you should be able to deliver how you want whether attempting vaginal or scheduled c-section.

 

I agree with Cynthia. It's your choice. My advice...poor on the tears! I also think that once you get to the hospital, they will do whatever you want. I think the only reason they scheduled mine was because of my husbands deployment. They would have fought me on it otherwise...like they have for the past month. Keep up the preserverance (sp?) and know that we're all here supporting you.

 

My doctor's office wouldn't schedule until closer to the due date. I was scheduled to be induced at 38 weeks just one week earlier. If I had wanted a c-section, it would have been scheduled at the same time. I agree with the pp that you really should get to choose the birth you want. A vaginal delivery was important to me and I was so glad both girls were head down-though my office would do a vaginal delivery as long as A was head down. In the end, I had the delivery you mentioned-twin A vaginally and twin B was born via emergency c-section due to cord prolapse. Personally, I wouldn't change it since having a vaginal delivery was important to me. A co-worker had twins earlier this year and I think my delivery gave her second thoughts about attempting a vaginal delivery. She had scheduled a c-section but went into labor on her own a week before the date. She was happy with her c-section delivery.

 

i too am a big planner and felt the same way - my doc had also said no later than 37 weeks, but wouldn't give me a date. i was so frustrated b/c I just wanted to be able to plan (my recovery, my return to work, the nanny's start date) but i couldn't! Ultimately, I developed a bad case pre-e (my liver was shutting down) at 34w and the date was given to me - one day i was told, quite unexpectedly, "You will be having babies TODAY." They were both head down so I started trying for a vaginal delivery, but when it didn't progress fast enough, to "save me," they did an emergency c-section.

The point is, even if they give you a date, the babies and your body may have other plans over the next several weeks. It's TOTALLY normal to be very anxious at this point - there's so much unknown, and so much excitement. I know, that doesn't really help! But with twins especially, you just never know what is going to happen. It's best to be prepared for anything . . . both before delivery and (as I'm learning) afterwards too.

In your case, you're lucky b/c your doc has given you an end date of 37 weeks. Not all docs do - or they say 38, 39 weeks (which frankly sounds like torture to me). And if your doc is like most others, he won't give you an exact date until you've hit at least 36 weeks. But have your bag packed earlier than that, b/c you just never know!

Now, about the c-section, pp are all right. It's YOUR body and you have every right to ask for a particular type of treatment. If you're sure you want a c-section, then you need to be loud and proud about it - make your wishes known (early and often) and if your doc seems unresponsive, you can say to him, this is my body and my choice and i want a c-section and if you won't do it, then please find me an ob who will. But really, all that may not be needed - my guess is that doc is playing coy and will not commit to the csection til you get closer to the 37 week date but will do it later if you want; most ob's would prefer to do a csection anyway b/c of rampant liability issues with vaginal deliveries.

 

I think you are still very early for them to schedule anything. My doctors didn't schedule me for my c/s until 3 days prior... and my baby A was transverse...so they knew for a long time that I had to have c/s. My c/s was scheduled at 37wks 5 days. They told me for a long time that they liked to schedule them around 36 or 37 weeks...but when it came down to it, it was very clear that they were actually more comfortable scheduling in the 37-38 week range. So it could be that your docs are holding you off just b/c they don't want to discourage you with that information...it's quite possible that you will go into labor on your own before then... if that happens, then there is always the slight possiblity that you will just go so fast that a vaginal delivery is inevitable.

I agree that it should be your chose. Personally, I would have loved if both my babies had been head down... I was bummed to have to do c/s. But I understand your fears. And I think that whenever someone has such fears the likelihood of problems coming up with a vag delivery are greater...so you might as well do c/s. Quite frankly, I'm surprised your doctors aren't just agreeing with you. It's unusual for docs to push for vag delivery when the risks are even slightly elevated. I'm sure there are lot of pro-vag twin moms out there who would love to have access to docs like that though!!

Anyway, like I said before, don't get discouraged if they don't schedule you for a LONG, LONG time... sometimes it has to do with office and hospital policy....it may not be that they are refusing you a c/s... even in my case where we all KNEW I HAD to have a c/s, they still didn't schedule it so far in advance... just not the way my hospital did things. And even when they did schedule it, I had to call in the day of surgery to make sure it hadn't been cancelled due to high volume rate of other laboring moms or emergency c/s going on...

 

Thanks everyone for your input. Like I said, I know anything can happen and the docs make it sound like it will be before 37 weeks just because I am so petite and they are getting big.

Of course the longer they stay in the better off they will be and I am not trying to rush this by any means.

And everyone has their own vision of birth, for me personally and this is not to make anyone mad or take away from anyone else's vision, but I never wanted to have a natural birth with no drugs and 10 people in the room and cameras, mirrors and video recorders in there. If I do go into labor and they really want me to have a natural and it works out that way no one will be allowed in the room but my husband. No cameras until the babies are fully out and cleaned up and then my husband can take them of them only. Then later that day or the next, people can come by and hold them and take tons of pictures then. For me a vaginal birth is not the part I am looking forward to, not because of the pain but because I think the after part of having them in my arms is so much more important.

That is just my own personal opinion and again not to start drama or make anyone mad. I am not mad at anyone who would want the total opposite of me, because everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

 

QUOTE(b/gtwinmom07 @ Aug 25 2007, 10:21 PM) [snapback]380057[/snapback]
Thanks everyone for your input. Like I said, I know anything can happen and the docs make it sound like it will be before 37 weeks just because I am so petite and they are getting big.

Of course the longer they stay in the better off they will be and I am not trying to rush this by any means.

And everyone has their own vision of birth, for me personally and this is not to make anyone mad or take away from anyone else's vision, but I never wanted to have a natural birth with no drugs and 10 people in the room and cameras, mirrors and video recorders in there. If I do go into labor and they really want me to have a natural and it works out that way no one will be allowed in the room but my husband. No cameras until the babies are fully out and cleaned up and then my husband can take them of them only. Then later that day or the next, people can come by and hold them and take tons of pictures then. For me a vaginal birth is not the part I am looking forward to, not because of the pain but because I think the after part of having them in my arms is so much more important.

That is just my own personal opinion and again not to start drama or make anyone mad. I am not mad at anyone who would want the total opposite of me, because everyone is entitled to their own opinion.


I understand what you mean..I'm not really a naturalist kind of person either... never wanted the mirror...never wanted pics of the kids prior to being cleaned up.... never even wanted bare belly shots during pg...just not me. (if this were 100 years ago I probably would be the type to want to just go do it by myself, total privacy.) But all the same, I still want a vbac...I think everyone has their own risk parameters. And I think that evaluating those risks are what influenced my preferences more than a "natural" vs. "unnatural" debate. ...Also vaginal delivery can be extremely "unnatural." There's a whole spectrum of choices you can have with vaginal delivery...it really isn't usually like one of those tv births with 100 people in the room while the woman is either stupidly serene or screaming her head off...I'm hoping to go very natural this time without drugs or epidural, but that's more b/c of risk thing with vbac. One thing I liked about the birth of my first dd was how peaceful it was with the epidural. I felt like I was able to really enjoy it. The c/s wasn't like that for two reasons..1.I dry heaved after both spinals I received...almost passed out on the table twice...so it took a bit for me to come out of that and just be aware enough to open my eyes... 2. I felt them stitching up my uterus up in my shoulder area (called referred pain...it can happen if the spinal isn't done high enough). So even though I went into the c/s with a very positive viewpoint... I was never down on c/s. I knew I needed it with the twins. It still wasn't the experience I thought it would be. I think the key to feeling good about the birth afterwards is to go into it with an open mind. Whether you have a vaginal birth or c/s you just really can't predict exactly how things will go. So long as you have the main goal of healthy mom and healthy babies, then you will more than likely come out satisfied. Everything else is icing IMHO. hope you have a very healthy remainder of your pg... and hope your babies are born nice and healthy no matter which route you go down!