Don't wish "it" away

My girls will be 11 months on Saturday.

I remember seeing other people's ticker wishing I could just get to that "one" point when everything would be better, easier, different. Those first few months were soooo hard don't get me wrong but they're gone, my little girls will never be little babies again.

I love each new stage but the little baby stage, oh the little itty bitty stage is magical. The late night feedings where they would just snuggle into my neck. I would hold them after the middle of the night feedings and think, "put them down, get some sleep". Now that they are STTN (almost every night) I can't wait to see them in the morning.

I by no means have it figured out. However, as I look back these are some of my thoughts

-They will eat when they are hungry. If they only take 2 ounces, they only want 2 ounces don't try and force more. I had a slow to gain/reflux baby and when her medicine wasn't right she probably would have starved herself, but when it was right they will eat when they are hungry.
-I wish I hadn't freaked about naps so much or setting bad habits. I always thought I had to provide the perfect environment, time for naps. That just caused more stress. I really don't think any bad habits can happen until after 6 months, if even then.
-I wish I wouldn't have tried to figure out how to get them to STTN. Both girls dropped their feeds on their own time, when needed. A dropped them quicker but J needed them longer (9.5 months I believe). When I stopped getting frustrated about it, it went so much easier. Let them take the lead. There are still some nights when we have to CIO as different stages causes them to wake and want to play but we know that now and are better equipped to "assess the scene".

Again, there are still some days when I think "whew, that went pretty bad" but every day is a new day to start it all over. To those with little ones, I know your pain, your frustration, your desperation for sleep, your wanting to have it figured out....enjoy this time. I don't want you to look back and have memories of trying to figure it out. Have memories of falling asleep in the chair, or nursing your baby to sleep or keeping them in the swing until they were 4 months because that's what worked for your baby. Enjoy every crazy, teeth not brushed, fast food for dinner (again) pj wearing day you can!!!


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Awww, thanks so much for that. Once again, I am crying. I wrote "Don't wish it away" on an index card and put it on the fridge. I will think of all those moms who miss having itsy bitsies when I see it, and be grateful for the two hours of sleep that I did get. These are my last babies, so I'm holding on for dear life to those sweet little fuzzy nuzzles.
:cry: :cry: :cry:

 

Thanks for that I needed it!! I've been worrying about all these things (although I really do want to sleep laying down again soon my back kills). Good reminder how fast the time goes and the little baby stage is so magical.

 

Thank you for your perspective. I've been feeling overwhelmed lately. It's so nice to be reminded what is really important when they are so little. Beth

 

Very good post. I felt the same way in the beginning and just couldn't wait until my girls would be 2months....3 months...etc. Now I just wish time would slow down!!

 

I could have written this.

The past few days I've been remember this time last year and it makes me really miss tiny babies.
I remember a specific feeding. DH was not home (he'd gone back to work at this point) so I was on solo duty. I was holding one baby while I burped them. Their neck had this slightly sweet, slightly sour smell from formula that had dribbled down their neck. I thought to myself that I had to remember that smell because one day I'd miss it. And now I do miss it.

 

That post was beautiful by twinmomkelly! I could not have said it better myself. Everyday I am looking back, missing the parts that are over...Even though they were hard times, filled with tears from all of us, I would go back in a heartbeat and do it again. They do new things everyday, make us laugh, still make us cry, etc, but its different. Every stage that ends leaves a little hole in your heart, because you can never go back.
Right now they are on the playmat looking at each other, feeling each other's faces, its too precious. A couple months ago they really didnt notice each other. Everyday is a new day, yet I miss the old. Its so strange. As bummed as I can get sometimes because I dont have time anymore, money etc, I remember that i am *the* luckiest person in the world in my opinion! I couldnt ask for anything more!

I agree, dont worry about the schedules, the habits etc. We made plenty of bad habits and were able to break them all. They still dont have a set schedule, and their sleeping habits change weekly. Keeps us on our toes, our tired, weak toes!

 

QUOTE(june07girl @ Dec 23 2008, 10:05 PM) [snapback]1121160[/snapback]
Very good post. I felt the same way in the beginning and just couldn't wait until my girls would be 2months....3 months...etc. Now I just wish time would slow down!!


Ditto!

 

:cry: Beautiful post. I miss those days when they'd fall asleep in my arms and snuggle in too. And you are right, once you let them take the lead and don't stress so much, things do go smoother. :hug:

 

oh......you made me cry :cry: :cry:
thank you sooooooooooooooooooooooo much.........next time I feel overwhelmed.........i will remember your post

 

i've made private notes to myself in my online journal so i can go back and read them as time passes. the one i keep going back to is one from about a month ago when owen had a bad night of intense crying. he finally calmed down and buried his head in my neck and fell asleep lying on my chest. i sat there in the quiet and listened to him breathe and thought to myself, "he's never going to be this little or need you this much ever again." i'm very conscious that every day they're getting older and they'll want more and more independence as they grow. i try to recall that moment and that thought whenever i'm feeling overwhelmed or stressed.

i know i'm going to miss the little boys when they become big boys. i want them to grow but at the same time i want those quiet loving cuddling moments to last forever.

 

Thank you so much...I so needed to read something like this today. For the past month I have been having more and more meltdowns. Mostly because I thought it would be so much easier at 4 months. It is just as hard if not harder...my paid help is gone because we can't afford it, my parents went back south and I am solo. DH works afternoons and nights has been working crazy hours to get us caught up and he sleeps during the day, so I am on my own day and night. I have been getting really frustrated with them waking for feeding during the night. I am so guilty of..."I wish they were 6 months" or "I can't wait until spring". These days are definitely hard, but your post made me realize i will miss them, just like i never thought I would miss being pregnant and I do. Crazy how the mind works! Thank you!