Does everyone enjoy breast feeding?

My twins are a month old and I must admit that I have a very hard time with breastfeeding. It took a long time for my milk to come in and they were tube feeding at the breast. I had the best intentions of tandem feeding but find single feeding so hard that I am pumping most of the time and only put them to the breast once or twice a day for a short period of time. I feel horrible that I am not doing what nature intended. I keep reading about so many women who love breast feeding.

 

:hug: No, not everyone does. I personally love it! I love every aspect of it! The fact that my baby(ies) are thriving because of me. The fact that it is ready made and nothing needs to be mixed up. Because it is ready at a moments notice. Because it is exactly what my baby(ies) need.
That said, breastfeeding may be natural, but it is difficult... especially with twins. You are still in the very difficult time. Give yourself time. You MAY come to like it and perhaps even enjoy it. If you don't, there is NOTHING wrong with you. Some women don't. :hug:

 

NO! For the first months I had a list of benefits taped to the mirror in my bathroom, the fridge, next to my bed....everywhere. I had to be convinced to continue. I was not one who "loved" it! I did grow to enjoy it and I loved the benefits for them, me, my wallet etc. I didn't tandem until they were about 3 months. I liked it better one-on-one and even when I did tandem it wasn't every time. You may benefit from doing what I did- I have myself a "must" date. I "must" BF until they are 12 weeks old and then I can change my mind. I did that and as soon as my commitment was met, I realized that BF got a whole lot easier and so I stuck with it. Hang in there!

 

QUOTE(girls! @ Nov 28 2008, 06:04 PM) [snapback]1089456[/snapback]
NO! For the first months I had a list of benefits taped to the mirror in my bathroom, the fridge, next to my bed....everywhere. I had to be convinced to continue. I was not one who "loved" it! I did grow to enjoy it and I loved the benefits for them, me, my wallet etc. I didn't tandem until they were about 3 months. I liked it better one-on-one and even when I did tandem it wasn't every time. You may benefit from doing what I did- I have myself a "must" date. I "must" BF until they are 12 weeks old and then I can change my mind. I did that and as soon as my commitment was met, I realized that BF got a whole lot easier and so I stuck with it. Hang in there!

This is very similar to my experience.

I was miserable in the first 6 weeks, and finally I was able to turn things around. As they get bigger and learn how to latch on their own, it gets ways easier, and that claustrophobic feeling goes away. But in the beginning it is very tough, and over time, I have learned to be flexible-- I've pumped, given supplemental bottles of formula, and fed them from the breast. If you want it to work, and you want to start feeling better about it be flexible, and set a goal for yourself and the babies--that seems to work for many of us.

 

Hang in there!

I too was another one who really, really, really did not like it at first But I'm stubborn and right around 8 weeks a lightbulb went off and it got much better. Better enough that we continued to 17.5 mo! I also didn't tandem right away, probably around 3 months old too.

I had visiting nurses in the house sometimes twice a day for a few weeks after the girls were born (csection issues) and I was going to punch someone in the nose if I heard one more time from one more person about what a wonderful bonding experience it was. At that point, I was just taking it one day at a time and I *knew* it had to get a little better soon, but I was definitely not in love with the process at that point!

 

:hug: Big, big hugs! Please do NOT beat yourself up. I was 100% committed to BFing, but there were SO many times in the first months where I just flat out HATED it. Only my stubbornness kept me going.

The good news is that it gets better and better as the babies get older. They get much faster at nursing, so you're not a prisoner on the couch all the time. And as the babies get more fun and interactive, nursing gets more fun, too. You're no longer trying to keep awake a blobby little newborn, you have two smiley, giggly little babies playing with each others' hands and popping off to grin at you.

I can truly say that I enjoy nursing more and more the older my kids get. But even now, there are nursing sessions here and there where I am just touched out and tired of refereeing their fights (one doesn't want the other playing with his/her hair, etc) and I'd rather be doing something else. But that's motherhood... The most amazing thing in the world, AND there are plenty of times where you'd rather be soaking in the tub by yourself!

Anyway, I'm sure the pumping must be really tiring too. It is SO hard to make time to pump (and then do all the cleanup) when you have two babies to look after. This might sound crazy and totally backward, but it might actually help if you made it a big priority to transition those babies to the breast. Sure, you still spend eternity feeding them...but you're not pumping, feeding, AND doing all the cleanup. Do you have a LC or LLL leader you could turn to for some help? And of course we'd be happy to do all we can too! (Btw, please please PLEASE don't feel guilty for pumping. There are just so many challenges with twins/preemies, and moms who hang in there and pump instead of just throwing in the towel are HEROES. Pumping is so much harder than BFing - it's the last thing in the world you should feel guilty for!)

Hang in there mama. You're doing great, and it will get better! And try to remember - just as nobody loves being a mom all the time, nobody loves BFing all the time. And it's ok. :hug:

 

I know a woman who BF until her 4 childrens' (no twins, though) 1st birthday. She did it because she knew it was best, but she never really liked it, and was always thrilled when she weaned. I honestly don't think that's the norm, though I'm sure some women enjoy it more than others. But like other people said, you are in the middle of the hardest time! Take it one day at a time, but you may surprise yourself and one day, when one of your babies smiles up at you while nursing, or you realize that they finished in record time, with no pain or frustration and are now contentedly snuggled up you might find that at least sometimes it can be enjoyable. If you hang in there and this ends up working for you, Fabulous! I've nursed 5 now. BUT, what your children need more than anything is a happy mommy to take care of them, so remember to take care of yourself, too!!!

 

Everyone is different. Don't feel bad for doing what works for you. I hated pumping SO much. Actually, the first 3 months of my sons' lives, I wanted to quit BFing every single day-- no joke! Now, at almost 18 months, I am still BFing one of them. The other self-weaned a few months ago. Good luck-- I hope it becomes easier for you if you decide to continue trying to BF.

 

:hug: I had a hard time getting my twins to BF and I have to admit that the first 3 months were VERY hard and I did not enjoy that time (the pumping/feeding aspect) at all. It was hard and stressful and I almost threw in the towel a million times. Yours are still so little and it really will get easier as they become stronger and nursing gets easier. When mine were a little over 3 months old I was able to tandem nurse. They had better head control, they were off of their heart monitors, etc. Then it was so easy that I was so happy that I stuck with it! Just hang in there! Are you working with an LC to get them to nurse more often? I visited mine once a week and she was a lifesaver. I hope it gets easier and more enjoyable for you soon!

 

i also hated BFing in the early days - right up until about the 3 month mark as well. we had tons of problems early on - i had two bouts of mastitis (requiring IV antibiotics), the girls had major latch issues which often led to toe-curling pain, they were very inefficient suckers so feedings took forever, and i found it impossible to tandem feed them when they were really little. the best advice i was given, that really helped to get me through, was to take each feeding as it comes - if you feel like trying them on the breast, than do so. if you just want to pump & give them a bottle of EBM, then do so. if you don't have enough EBM and need to give them some formula, then do so. eventually, if you stick with it, you'll all get the hang of it & come up with a system that works for you! i started to enjoy BFing a lot more once it got easier, although i still have my moments where it's not my favorite thing. GL!

 

I never enjoyed breastfeeding. I didn't like it with my son, and I didn't enjoy it with the girls either. I pumped the majority of the time for the girls and hated that, too. My only motivation was that it was the best I could give them. I received as much joy holding them and feeding them a bottle as I did offering my breast. I just didn't get ooey gooey gushy feelings from it as many other moms describe. Woman who don't enjoy breastfeeding are not weird or bad moms, so don't feel like it is something you have to enjoy--that's just not true.

 

I did come to love it, but not at the stage where you are now! I'd categorize the first 6 weeks as survival. I agree with setting the goals for yourself, and realizing this is a choice. You could feed them formula but you do this because you choose to. It started to getting easier for me when 1) I realized I could at any time open one of those sample cans and give them formula and 2)one started STTN pretty consistently and one did sometimes.

I went back to work when they were 14 weeks old. By then it was so much easier. When I got home in the afternoons, I looked forward to that first session with them. No matter who did what for them all day (usually DH) or what I had to put up with at work, that was one time that was just for us, and I was doing something that only I could do. That was probably when I started loving it -- how selfish is that? :laughing:

 

I honestly hated it for the first 6wks, and felt like quitting multiple times/day. Then up until 12wks I still disliked it, but it did become easier. Now at 10months in, I do it because I know it is what is best for the babies, and there are times that I like it, but for the most part I am looking forward to weaning. I have just learned that it is ok not to love it!
It does get easier, you are truly in the hardest part right now. I am glad that I stopped pumping though, and just went straight to the breast, it was definintely easier in the long run.

Good luck!

 

I was also one that hated it in the beginning. Sometimes I still do hate it because my body has been at theirs for 15 months now and I can't wait for it to be mine again! There are times when I love it (more often than not) and am so proud of myself for doing it and sticking with it. Honestly, I'm really surprised I've made it this long. Mine is still a love/hate relationship and I often envy people who are formula feeding because it seems so much easier, but I'm still here and going strong.

 

With the twins, BFing was a chore. And I didn't have DH's support. He supported BFing itself, he just didn't give me the support I needed to BF twins, and wouldn't help me try to tandem feed them (I never mastered that one) Both girls required nipple shields, and I needed help getting them both latched on at the same time... All he could do was say, "well the Dr said to do it like this...." Grrr... BFing did not last long with the girls, and even what BM they did receive was mainly EBM, as I found pumping every 3 hours to be MUCH easier than attempting to BF them....


Now, with my son, I absolutely LOVE BFing him. He's ONE baby, and he is a BF champ. He loves to hold my hand while he's eating, and it's just a good bonding experience for us. With the girls, our bonding experience was still there, it was just with a bottle instead and I was OK with that. It wasn't worth the stress I was going through to continue BFing and THAT affected our relationship, both with the girls and with DH...

 

I never liked it with any of my 4 kids. I did it because I thought it was best for them but I did not like it. I had a little party each time they weaned I have met quite a few woman who when we got talking admitted they didn't love it or have those gooey feelings either. It's weird because I am such a gooey mom. I could hug and kiss my kids all day long. Pretty much everything they do makes me laugh, smile or cry in delight. I never found bf bonding.

 

It was awful for the first couple of months! Up until they were 8-10 weeks old, I thought daily about quitting. It was WORK, Hard work, and not enjoyable at all!! My DH, lactation consultant, and the ladies here on these boards helped me through those challenging days.

My boys are nursing strong at 10.5 months, and we all LOVE it! (I'd love it even more if they were sleeping thru the night, but...) I love nourishing them as they get older and more active; it's very empowering! Now that they are so busy, it is nice to have those sweet cuddle times too...

 

I love nursing my boys. I think it's easier for me to enjoy it since I know how hard I worked to pump and keep up my supply for their almost 3 month nicu stay.

 

Don't tell my kids, but I HATED breastfeeding!!! Every minute of it! I did it because I was good for them. I also had every issue under the sun- yeast infection in the breast, thrush, mastitis, constant supply issues, biting, etc. But I nursed every kid as long as they would have anything to do with me. (DD #1 till 9 mo, dd#2 till 10 mo, and DD#3 &4 till they were 1 year.) Besides carrying twins to full term, there is nothing in my life I am more proud of than nursing twins till 12 mo...)

Hated it.....But it was good for them....

 

It has been a long time since I breastfed my children (they are 5), but I enjoyed every second of it. I breastfed them for nearly 4 months (long story, my lactation consultant sucked and never told me that It would help to pump :angry: , I ran out of milk by 3 months )

Anyhow, I always fed mine at the same time and still get teary eyed when I remember those days! It has been by far, the best thing that has happened to me besides having them of course!

 

I'd say it comes and goes - I didn't love or hate it at first - it was a lot of work but it wasn't something I ever considered not doing. There were times when I've felt like it was a big chore, and there are times when it's it's really sweet and wonderful - it definitely has highs and lows.

 

I didn' read op, but It was a while before I loved it with the twins. I had such good experiences with my singletons that I was determined to give it a good try with twins. I made a commitment to try it for 2 mos then decide if it was worth it. It was hard and uncomfortable and frustrating and I felt like a failure everytime I supplemented w/ formula, but we kept at it and now I wouldn't trade it for anything!!!