Do you ever just take out ONE of your twins ?

My dh was home today and I took the opportunity to take each of the twins out on their own. The first one went with me to a "mother's information group" and the other trip the other twin went shopping. Oh My .... IT WAS SO EASY !!

I don't get what singleton mom's complain about..... it was so easy to hit several stores and get everything done ! I've taken them out alone before, but it has been sometime. I enjoyed my time with each of them so much and found I was able to talk to them more and therefore teaching them things ("look at the oranges" "see the cars" etc.) instead of being so focused on watching "them". Nobody stopped me or asked me stupid questions.. it was great !

A very very very small part of me feels like I've missed out on what it must feel like to enjoy just one baby. The ease of not looking in two different directions... is that so wrong of me to feel that way ?

Heather

 

No, I don't think it's wrong of you to feel that way at all. I think there are probably advantages and disadvantages to having singletons as well as twins. Of course in the infant stage there are lots more challenges with having 2 babies - but once they get a little older, 2 babies means always having a play mate and not always needing mom to play with.

I've also taken 1 baby to the doctor before and thought to myself "whoa this is a piece of cake!" I understand why singleton moms make comments like "I don't know how you do it" because it really is a lot more challenging to cart 2 babies around as opposed to one. But if you'd never had twins and had only had a singleton you'd probably think that was difficult too. Just like moms of triplets probably look at us moms with twins and think that 2 babies is so easy, kwim?

I totally understand feeling like you missed out on something by having more than 1 baby. I feel like I missed out on the "normal" mom experience. I want to have a 3rd baby one day when the girls are older so I can really experience what it is like to have a singleton.

 

It is lots of fun to take them out individually and much less work for one who is used to taking 2 or 3 out at a time. I try and do it when I get the opportunity.

 

ha! i often take one and leave one home. it is easier for everyone involved. its true what you say - i am much more attentive and interactive when i only have one baby to look after. during the early months, i totally had single baby envy. every time we were out and i saw a new mom wearing her baby, id look down at the double snap and go and feel envious of the simplicity of one. less stuff to deal with all together. but....i also see parents complaining about their children being very needy and demanding and always needing to be entertained by them and i think of all the great things about twins. my girls werent held as much early on because it just wasnt possible - so i cant relate when a friend tells me that she cant get anything done because her child always wants to be held. i also think we were more determined to get them into a bedtime routine and sleeping through the night because having two poor sleepers can be very difficult. so i cant relate when a friend complains that she is still up 2 times a night feeding and changing her 18 month old. i could go on and on but i really feel that having twins forces you to be more organized and you end up with more independent toddlers who sleep very well. now that my girls are older sometimes i look at people with one baby and think that the baby must be so lonely. funny how things change and we adjust.

 

ive taken just DS to his dr appts and left DD at home, only cuz i wasnt allowed to bring DD though. it feels weird without having them both there. and to be honest, i like having both of them when i go out cuz if people look at them, and then look at me, i have an excuse for looking like crap when im out with only one they probably just think i look like crap, stupid mom cant get her stuff together lol. i did take DS to bru a few weeks ago and left DD with dh cuz shes easier to deal with and we needed diapers, etc and dh didnt feel like going out after work.

 

Yep - often go out with just the one! Its such a luxury.

 

I've brought them each out with me alone, and it was great. Sometime I feel guilty if I don't give them completely equal attention, when I have only one it is so easy to feel connected to that baby. DH feels the same way! He loves when we each have one baby it is so easy playing and feeding.

 

I don't very often, but I did just get an umbrella stroller so that it would be easier when I want too. I did have a few hours at home with just one the other day (DS2 took a very, very long nap) and it was awesome. I got to play with DS1, I got the dishes put up, dishwasher loaded, bottles washed and floor vacuumed - then we still played some more.

 

I make it a point to take each one of them out by themselves at least 2-3 times a month. I love having one-on-one time with them. It is day and night different. Instead of the stroller I put them in a cart (like normal moms!! WOW!! That's how they do it. Don't laugh, but it seriously took me a few minutes to figure out how to put the carseat in a high chair, and a shopping cart the first time) or even better carry them around in a sling.

DH also has a hard time dealing with both of them at the same time (he refuses to feed two at once, so they cry/fuss/scream when I leave them with him over a feeding time) and I want him to have bonding time w/o mommy, too.

It's probably one of the best things we have ever done. For everyone.

I used to wonder what it would be like to only have one baby - one fussing baby, one baby to get in and out of the car/stroller/house, one baby teething, one baby waking up in the middle of the night. But before long I just couldn't imagine my life without both of them. And when I think about having more children I hope we have more twins. Seriously. Yes, I know I am crazy...

Those singleton moms just don't what they are missing out on! And those of us lucky enough to have twins - we should count our blessings every day no matter what chaos our kiddos have created today.

 

I did one time and OMG it was a breeze I laugh in the face of those with one baby that complain it was so funny when I got home DH and I both said MAn that was easy

 

Oh yeah, I sometimes do this so it is easier at home for the hubby and then I am not worried about how he is doing.. After Twins, I know he can handle one

 

My DH and I tag team all the time! I actually took my son to a pedicure once (when he was about 3.5 mos. old) and left DD home with him because at the time she was the more fussy one. The guy doing the pedicure kept saying he should paint DS's nails and I told him that my husband would kill me. He was already a little weireded out with me taking DS and not DD. Hee, hee.

I do agree though with many of the posts here. It is important that we get alone time with each of them. It really allows us to connect with each kid, but I also could not imagine my life without each one of them and find myself so happy to have twins every day! When it gets tough, I also tell myself that thank God I don't have more children (those of you who do...whew, you rock!) and thank God I don't have triplets! My MIL had five kids and then had twins in the 6th pregnancy...she amazes me!!!

 

If i can take just one i will i agree its much easier! that said i can compare since i had singletons as well
I took my DD to the mall with my friend and we barely got stopped that was so nice! its funny thou i made sure to tell everyone she had a twin sister! :lol: maybe i felt a bit guilty for taking the "less fussy" one

 

Ohhh I love taking one out at a time if I can.

However I get sad thinking of the one at home ( know I know, it doesn't matter!) I took J out the other day and she is the tinier one so I always feel insecure with people looking at her as a singleton. I feel like I have to say "she's a twins..." "she's a twin" to everyone. I think me buying two of the same jacket probably helped the clerk (that or she thought I must REALLY like the jacket).

And yes. It was SOOOOO easy. We stayed out about 45 minutes later than usual just because she was so quiet and content.

 

I try and do this once or twice a week - it is such a breeze with only one baby! And, I think it is good alone time with mommy, which I also think it important for the babies to have. Yup, after having two, taking out just one is a luxury!

 

QUOTE(ese @ Oct 24 2008, 07:19 AM) [snapback]1039940[/snapback]
ha! i often take one and leave one home. it is easier for everyone involved. its true what you say - i am much more attentive and interactive when i only have one baby to look after. during the early months, i totally had single baby envy. every time we were out and i saw a new mom wearing her baby, id look down at the double snap and go and feel envious of the simplicity of one. less stuff to deal with all together. but....i also see parents complaining about their children being very needy and demanding and always needing to be entertained by them and i think of all the great things about twins. my girls werent held as much early on because it just wasnt possible - so i cant relate when a friend tells me that she cant get anything done because her child always wants to be held. i also think we were more determined to get them into a bedtime routine and sleeping through the night because having two poor sleepers can be very difficult. so i cant relate when a friend complains that she is still up 2 times a night feeding and changing her 18 month old. i could go on and on but i really feel that having twins forces you to be more organized and you end up with more independent toddlers who sleep very well. now that my girls are older sometimes i look at people with one baby and think that the baby must be so lonely. funny how things change and we adjust.


I like how you put this...I think we do adjust...We can take each one out and spend special time with them individually AND we can spend time with our twosome together. We get the best of both worlds!