Do you discipline for throwing food?

DH and I were having this discussion the other evening- Kaysie purposely throws her food- and we were wondering is this something now that we start disciplining on ? I know I have read in books where they are learning all this stuff that is incorporated with throwing- but we are at the point where it needs to stop so we have been flicking her hand after we tell her "no throw". She hands us her sippy now when she is done if she doesn't want it on he tray but yesterday- she was throwing pasta. She knows she isn't supposed to do it because she smiles sheepishly.

I was curious to know what you do- and when you started? We are trying to teach them manners- and I really think now is the time to start? What do you think?

 

DH and I were having this discussion the other evening- Kaysie purposely throws her food- and we were wondering is this something now that we start disciplining on ? I know I have read in books where they are learning all this stuff that is incorporated with throwing- but we are at the point where it needs to stop so we have been flicking her hand after we tell her "no throw". She hands us her sippy now when she is done if she doesn't want it on he tray but yesterday- she was throwing pasta. She knows she isn't supposed to do it because she smiles sheepishly.

I was curious to know what you do- and when you started? We are trying to teach them manners- and I really think now is the time to start? What do you think?

 

I don't discipline them but I do take it as a sign that they are finished. I remove the food and wash them up. We still eat every couple of hours between meals and snacks so it's not like they are going to go hungry for long if they aren't completely full.

 

I think you are on the right track. just gently flick hand and say "NO, no throwing food. We don't throw food." I also say, "You may eat that, or leave it on your tray, or hand it to mommy, or give it to your sister to eat, but no throwing. If you throw, mommy thinks you are all done. Are you all done? (make sign)" Then when the meal is over, I have them help me pick up what they made a mess on the floor and put it in the garbage. (no pets here). The whole time they are picking up the mess, I am reminding them how they should not throw food. I had to do this alot, but the throwing food has really calmed down ALOT. They still throw it, but it's more like testing to see if the No THrowing rule is still in force.

 

I didn't. When they did that we started telling them to put it on the table if they were all done. If they continued to play with their food then we took it away from them. Luckily we don't get much food throwing these days.

 

My girls are younger and I'm wondering how to deal with this also. It's not throwing so much as dropping it on the floor, intentionally, but not for any other reason than they don't want it/don't like it. Toward the end of the meal they often do what we call the windshield wiper. The tray is the windshield and their arm is the wiper! Ugh. I hate that.

Right now, I pick up the food, say no throw and either take that food away or the entire tray. I give one warning for the windshield wiper move. It is usually done when they are full or close to it.

It's all a mystery, though.

 

Yes.

Joy is starting to do it, and she knows what No means. I tell her no, quite sternly. If she still does it, she is taken out of seat and has to pick it up. Yesterday she sat on the floor with a little bowl and probably picked up about 100 cherrios!!!

 

Our boys love to throw things, and they would really sling their food across the room when they didn't want to eat it.... and they KNEW it was wrong. For awhile I just ignored the bad behavior and praised the good. But it was clearly not working, so I started saying "NO. No throwing!" very sternly. Sometimes I will also take ahold of their little hands when I am saying it.

They still do it occasionally, but it's a huge difference from what they used to do. They now hand me food they don't want and say their version of "thank you" and I make a big deal out of how nice that was.

 

That phase made me crazy. One day I decided it had to stop. So, when it happened at the next meal, I warned them that throwing their food meant they were done eating and if it happened again I would take their trays. Now, remember, I was talking to 17 month olds, so I'm not sure how much of my warning they understood. What they did understand, though, was after the next piece hit the floor, the offender lost their tray, got their hands washed and was taken down from the table. It only took a couple of meals before they got the message. Thankfully, the only food that ends up on the floor now is the occasional accidental spill or a bumped sippy.

 

At their age, I usually gave a warning or 2 and then I would take the food away. I do think they have the ability to understand and start to learn what behavior is appropriate and not.

 

1st offense "no, no throwing food"
2nd offense, food they are throwing gets taken away
3rd offense, they are finished and removed from the table.

Not sure you would call it discipline but that's what we do.

 

I definately disciplin for food throwing. They get one chance then its gone, or they are done with their meal. It is developmentally normal for them to do this but it is unacceptable in certain situations in our home. I personally believe balls are for throwing not food. I also felt the need to start disciplining as soon as possible so I dont have a huge mess on my hands when they get older. You dont have to listen to me, I have a tendence to be strict with rule and consequences, but I do give lots of love and praise for jobs well done.

 

I have started disciplining. I know they are doing it intentionally now, so I feel this is behavior that needs to be corrected. Accidental dropping of food will happen, and I can tell what's intentional and what's not.
What I do is:

1st offense - Are you all done (make all done sign)?
If they do the "all done" sign back and/or start handing me the food, I clean up and take food away.
If they shake their head no and try to keep the food, I say "stop throwing food or it goes away"
Sometimes they resume eating.

2nd offense - OK, you must be all done, and I take away the food. They usually start crying, but get over it once they are out of chair, or move on to the fruit course. We do fruit for dessert, and they almost never throw fruit. It might not be "right" for them to get their dessert even if they threw their main course, but seeing how the fruit is a big source of their nutrition, I think it's OK. I certainly wouldn't give them a cookie if they threw food.


The food throwing has gotten better.

 

Well, the way I do it is, take it away, and tell them 'if you throw food, you don't eat' sometimes that helps... but if they are playing with it, and not eating... they aren't hungry (usually). My motto is 'take it or leave it' and they sure aren't starving. The pedi gave us this little handout, that said to use that method... because they will eat when they are hungry...

 

My boys are a little over a year and we are REALLY having this problem, too! I don't think they're telling me they're finished because they are eating with one hand and throwing with the other (hey, at least they're coordinated). I keep my DustBuster by my side at every meal!

WE are also doing that windshield wiper thing!!! Food flies everywhere and they literally have food from the tips of their fingers to above their elbows.

I'm ready for this stage to be over - I don't remember my DD doing it.

 

At 17 months the food throwing is getting better. We do not dicipline for it. We will remove food when it is obvious they are throwing it because they no longer are hungry. It is simply a phase that they learn a lot from - think of the scientific principals involved. By 2 usually most of the food throwing is over. I also find that the more reaction they get out of me the more fun it is. I simply don't stress about it, this too shall pass.

Oh, by the way having dogs really helps with the clean-up

 

Such a horribly messy stage!

I think we did as another pp mentioned. We assumed they were done and the food was gone. Of course, we also were very vocal about it all. Saying that if you're not eating your food, then you're done and mommy takes the plate. Usually within a week, if you're consistant, they'll catch on that food goes in the tummy, not across the room. AND we gave them a chance or two to be "good".

Sometimes, it was just too funny to watch! Such as dry cheerios being thrown. I have a few of those pictures. . . Or the dog with spaghetti all over her back.

 

Mine do the windshield wiper too. (As well as the "drop it over the edge just to see what happens.") I am trying to ignore it. If they drop just a little food, I pretend I didn't see it, and don't pick/wipe it up until they're no longer looking. If they drop all their food, I say "Are you all done?" If they keep eating, fine, but if they continue dropping food (or take just another bite or two and then resume dropping food), I say, "OK, you're all done!" and clear away the trays.

I figure this is not a safety issue (unlike, say, touching the oven or playing with DH's computer), so if they are doing it for attention, the best response is to ignore it.

So far it hasn't been a huge problem, but if it gets worse, I guess I may have to actively scold or discipline for it. In the meantime, DH keeps threatening to get a dog.

 

Mine would throw it everywhere and it resembled a war zone when supper was over. I remember posting for help and someone said maybe just put a little of one food on the plate at a time and let them get what they want of it then try the next course and so on. That was good advice but they still could figure out how to make a mess. Now that they are older they still throw food sometimes and now they get in trouble for it.

Mary