DH Moody

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by Boni, Dec 4, 2006.

  1. Boni

    Boni Well-Known Member

    I am just wondering if any of you ladies out there are also suffering with dh that are moody since you are pregnant. My dh has a lot of pregnancy symptoms like he got all the cravings, and the weight to show for it, he gets tired as well. But the latest is moodiness. Now at least I have an excuse for being moody sometimes and i know i am. But his sence of humour has gone south and he stayed behind. We are fighting about everything and he is irritating me so. Is it just us or does this happen to other people as well? And how did you resolve it?
     
  2. Boni

    Boni Well-Known Member

    I am just wondering if any of you ladies out there are also suffering with dh that are moody since you are pregnant. My dh has a lot of pregnancy symptoms like he got all the cravings, and the weight to show for it, he gets tired as well. But the latest is moodiness. Now at least I have an excuse for being moody sometimes and i know i am. But his sence of humour has gone south and he stayed behind. We are fighting about everything and he is irritating me so. Is it just us or does this happen to other people as well? And how did you resolve it?
     
  3. Marbear

    Marbear Well-Known Member

    Well, it is the holidays so maybe he is stressed. My DH gets the winter blahs. He could be stressed about having 2 more mouths to feed. I seriously wondered why I married Dh after the birth of our first child...and then it turned out his fatigue and moodiness was hypothyroidism. Hopefully your DH will figure out his glitch and fix it. YOU are the one with the insane hormones, so what is HIS excuse?
     
  4. Dianne

    Dianne Well-Known Member

    I think it is completely normal for men to go through something like this. Alot of men don't like to openly admit how nervous/apprehensive they feel about bringing in two newborns into their family at the same time. Have you tried talking to him about it? I would try to find a time when it would be appropriate to talk calmly and maybe bring up any fears you might personally have about the upcoming change. Maybe this would get him talking and you could get to the bottom of these emotions? This is where it is a good thing that pregnancy lasts a few months, everyone gets a chance to adjust and attempt to prepare. While I don't think there is anyway to 100% prepare I do think every little bit of preparation helps. Have you talked to him about taking some birth/parenting classes? Maybe he is just really nervous and showing it in all different ways?
     
  5. Overachiever

    Overachiever Well-Known Member

    You are not alone. My DH has been a beast the last 2 weeks. I like the way you put it - his sense of humor is GONE - and that's one of the things I love best about him.
    We were having a serious discussion about it last night; it's combination of the worry that's built up around the babies, his job frustrations, the holidays which are always a financial strain since our DD's B-day is also in Dec, and the burden of doing all the cooking, housework, and driving of DD (4x a week to lessons).
    Anyway, I'm trying to be supportive of him and sensitive, but I feel like crap and have all the same concerns; sometimes I feel like I have more of a "right" to feel this way. I forget that he's human and not a rock.
    Anyway, hang in there. I'm hoping it will get better once these babies are born and he can bond with them and we get past Xmas.
    It's how we get through the hard times that define us as a couple.
    For better or worse, right??
     
  6. kendraplus2

    kendraplus2 Well-Known Member

    Oh, you are SO not alone ... my honey went insane for awhile. This was a completely unplanned pregnancy -- we aren't married, but have been together a long time and lived together, and all of a sudden, I'm pregnant, and then we find out it's twins ... some of the stuff I don't blame him for, I mean, we were both thrust into this situation that we didn't plan ... I ended up telling him that I wanted him with me because he loved me, not because it is the "right thing to do" ... screaming match where I called him names and told him I could do this by myself ... him acting like a TOTAL JERK and an a$$ to me ... my dad actually stepped in and had a "chat" with him. Now we are so much closer than we ever were, he is my true love and partner and we are both excited for what is happening ... but yep, we went through a patch months ago where it was bad. He was so moody, he'd come home drunk from the bar and trash our relationship, and how are we going to do this, etc ..... but he was in a total tailspin panic and I do understand.

    I think they go through phases, ESPECIALLY with twins, where they wonder how the heck they are going to do this, how are they going to support you and two babies, their life as they knew it is over, etc - and they get moody, grumpy, and depressed, and their stress level is through the roof. But we got through it and are that much stronger for it (we can actually laugh now about the time I smashed his cell phone and broke it), and you will too. Hopefully it will make you stronger as a couple - it did for us.

    [​IMG]
     
  7. Heathermomof5

    Heathermomof5 Well-Known Member

    Mine is moody also - I wish I could get him to realize it!
    he bites my head off and our older kids' heads off all the time over STUPID LITTLE things!!!! it used to upset me [​IMG] but
    now it just makes me MAD [​IMG]!!!! and I tell him matter of a factly
    what I think of his attitude!! I do think it is just stress but
    our kids are not like puppies that I just brought home (which I did
    do that once) He wanted these babies and helped make them just as much as I did!!! and I think my DH is a little jealous (He would NEVER say it (or he better not!) of me not working anymore -
    but he would be TOTALLY LOST in my world - he doesn't even know
    who our kids teachers are!! and he has to call me if he has to make the first decision (which I appreciate) but will Jared eat a hamburger or chicken nuggets? ASK JARED HE IS 10 NOW and can TALK!!!(that happened last weekend when he took them out for the day!)
     
  8. Michelle B

    Michelle B Well-Known Member

    My husband is getting his masters. He is in the Navy and they are sending him to school to become a CRNA. He is right in the middle of a 30 month program, spending about 80 hrs a wk at that hospital doing cases and studying for his classes.

    Originally, we had both agreed that we wanted more kids, but would wait until he completed this rigorous program. Then around May of this year, I had a talk with him and told him I was really nesting and wanting another baby. I knew he was not going to be around that much and I knew that I could handle it by myself. I was just not going to put my life on hold for his program. He understood and said we could start trying to have a baby. Well, I got pregnant in July with twins. I didn't think it would happen so fast and I certainly had no idea we would become pregnant with twins.

    Eric tries his best to do what he can when he is home, which doesn't feel like it is all that often. When he is home, he is usually studying or preparing for the next day's cases. He gets stressed occassionally, and that means we see him even less because he will study harder. He never takes his stress out on us, but we really feel his absence.

    I talked him into having another baby because I felt certain I could handle this on my own. But now I am feeling cheated and I know that he is too. I need so much help around the house and taking care of our dd. He just can't help, so I push myself too hard. Then I start to resent his absence. He feels cheated because he hasn't been able to be at one ultrasound, he doesn't get to feel them kick that much, he won't be around that much after they are born. His program doesn't end until March 2008.

    So, don't feel alone in your angst over your husband. We all have our little quirks.
     
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