Crying only when I am home

My boys are recovering from RSV and teething UGH! but for the last couple of weeks they have been crying hysterically when I come home. When I'm gone, my husband says they are happy and playing the SECOND I walk in the door they start screaming. I figured they just want my attention since I've been gone, but then they continue for up to an hour after that (i sit on the floor with them so they have my undivided attention)...they are 15.5mths old...

Any idea what's going on??

thanks so much!
reb

 

Honestly, I think it just goes with the territory of being MOMMY!!

My two did that around your boys' ages and my two are now almost 26 months and they still do this. Except now they also say things like, "No, Finley - that's MY Mommy!!" :laughing: My oldest went through this, too. He still does on occasion. Mommy is like their "safe place" where they can let it all out!

Hope they get to feeling better very soon! :hug:

 

I'm hoping Jori is right. I have been encountering this as well and I think it is because I started working full-time/over-time when my DH lost his job on Christmas Eve. It was just so unexpected to have a SAHM and then the very next day have a complete switch. At least that's what I'm hoping. He's going back to work tomorrow so we will see if it improves. I have been feeling that it is what Jori said. I am who they feel safe expressing everything with. My DH seems to feel that I am not disciplining correctly so they think they can get away with anything with me, but I disagree. Anyhow, just wanted you to know that I know the feeling, know how much it sucks, and hope it gets better for you soon!

 

Mine do this on and off, especially if they are particularly needy for some reason like if they are getting teeth, have a cold, didn't take a good nap, etc. When they realize I am home it is like they just then realize that I have been gone and they both want to be held or climb on me, cry when the other gets the coveted lap spot, or even have a meltdown if I give the other their food, milk, whatever first. I don't know what causes it, but it seems that right about the time when I am at my wits end and can't handle the whining and fighting for one second longer they suddenly became happy, smiling, hugging (me and each other)independent playing babies again. In our house, the smallest things can make them grumpy if they aren't feeling well or are tired and they go through a mommy stage - it feels like they are torturing you because they only treat you this way but really their clinging and whining is just a show of love - or at least that's what I tell myself! Hang in there - it's tough because you really want to enjoy your time with them but the screaming can make you count the minutes for sure!

 

we have the same issue in our house too! and it definitely gets worse the more i'm out of the house for work. i've had a couple of brutal days when i've made a point of rushing home or even leaving work early to make it home in time to play with the girls before bed only to have two hysterical, grumpy toddlers make me crazy & wish i'd stayed at work. ardon: it sucks, but i agree with PPs - i think it's a round about way of saying they missed us & love us!

 

That's just their way of telling you they missed you! My guys do the same thing, but I wish they'd find another way to express their love. My boys also have this "witching hour" thing between about 5-6 pm, which is when I come home. They can be perfectly fine all day, but when we get to the witching hour, they become whining, crying, clinging psycho-toddlers.

My SIL (who is an MSW) was here this weekend and we were actually talking about this, and about tantrums. She said that often your kids only have tantrums around you, because they feel comfortable enough to "let go". ardon: I think it's the same with the crying/whining/clinging too. I know I should feel flattered when they do this, but that's very hard to do when you have 2 rugrats attached to your legs.

When dealing with this in the evenings, we employ a variety of techniques (none of which are foolproof): one of us sitting on the floor reading/playing with them while the other cooks, distraction (blowing bubbles in the kitchen is a big hit), a few crackers (if it's been a while since their last snack and dinner is more than 15 minutes out), and sometimes we have to pull out the big guns: Baby Signing Time videos. :lol:

 

Thank you everyone, it's great to know I'm not the only one. I've switched my hours at work a few weeks agoa so now I'm home with them until 2pm. I'm glad to know it's not something I'm doing/not doing.

It's so hard when I'm alone to get anything done, ie; make lunch etc. What do all of you do? Do you let them cry? I feel horrible, but I often have too. I can't cook and carry them at the same time, I do my best to distract them and play sing songs etc...I'm not too big on tv, however it has saved us...just LOVE Laurie Berkner!

The development person snuffed at us when she asked how much tv they watch ("because kids under 2 shouldn't watch any") is how she phrased her question. I told her if she had a better idea with dealing with twins when you have to get something done, and it's the only way, please let us know...and of course my husband pipes up and says, we'd love for you to come over and help if your offering! lol! that shut her up!

Anyway, thank you for allowing me yet again a safe place to vent...need to get my crying babies from their nap! sigh...

reb

 

*Definitely* not you!! This is just a fussy age, I'm finding.

It is nigh impossible for me to get anything of substance done when I'm alone with my boys. I WOHM, but DH travels a bit, and I'm home alone with them on some weekends/nights. Meal times are *TOUGH*! I have a cabinet next to my stove that I filled with toy pots/pans, Tupperware, measuring cups/spoons and other toddler-safe kitchen stuff so they can "help" me when I'm cooking. This does provide some relief. Sometimes they'll play by themselves for a bit and I'm able to throw in a load of laundry or check email, but I can't count on it.

Pfft, she can stuff it. I love your DH's response; that was perfect! Before I had the boys, I was one of those people who said "my kids will NEVER watch TV" (because we don't watch almost any ourselves), and got on my high horse about it, but you know what? I had kids, and twins to boot! Yesterday DH was gone during the morning, the boys were out-of-this-world fussy, and I put on an Elmo's World DVD. You do the best you can as a parent, and having happy kids for 20 minutes is a wonderful thing. Twins are TOUGH!!

Any time, dear. :hug:

 

My dd demanded Barney yesterday :blink:, and I know all the words to most Yo Gabba Gabba and Jack's Big Music Shows so definitely t.v. watching going on around here. As far as getting things done - we definitely let them destroy the house - they have a tupperware drawer that they can get in and out of, fridge magnets that they constantly take on and off and move around, etc. AND we have found that sometimes they are content to sit in their booster chairs and play with something on the tray and that keeps them contained and happy!