Cranky after doc visit

After a week of thinking labor was on its way, I'm back from my doctor visit with her statement "I don't think you are going early." I practically freaked out. She won't schedule any C-section until 39 weeks (Dec. 28); she's thinking I'll make it about 38 weeks (Dec. 22). She won't budge at all on rescheduling my "C," although she once said she'd try to get it to Dec. 21. I'm absolutely so upset about being in the hospital during Christmas because I am so upset about not seeing my daughter -- the hospital has a flu policy of "no kids" right now.

Here's the rundown: I'm 35 weeks, 3 days today. I've had twice-a-week NSTs for the past two weeks. Last week my first NST showed a lot of contractions. I was at the hospital for hours -- the final result was likely a full bladder/slightly dehydrated, plus I have an irritable uterus. They checked my cervix (closed) and gave me an FFN, which was negative, before sending me on my way. I've been drinking more, making sure my bladder is completely empty before the test, and now my NSTs are relatively normal except for my irritable uterus. Yesterday I had my last growth check and Baby boy A is 5 lbs 6 oz. and Baby girl B is 6 lbs. 8 oz. To me, that was great and OK and I was thinking they are a perfect size and OK to come out. And let's top off this whole report by saying I'm losing my mucous plug gradually, since Monday.

Both babies are head-down now, which screwed up my plans for a C-section. Today the doc said she's comfortable with me having a vaginal, if I want it, or I can go for an elective C-section, if I want it. This is my second pregnancy -- my daughter was 8 lb. 3 oz. but facing up, so the doc says I'm capable of pushing out a 9 lb. 3 oz. baby, and since it's my second birth and the babies are small, I'd likely be OK with vaginal. She's also OK with a C-section because unlike my daughter, the twins are IVF. I'm still up the air -- a vaginal seems like a better recovery, obviously, but I'd hate to do both: a V with baby A and a C with baby b.

And my doc says the negative FFN means I won't deliver for FOUR weeks (which is Dec. 23). I've only read a 96 percent chance of NOT delivering within TWO weeks, and multiples sometimes skews the numbers. Is this true? I've never heard that the test is good for FOUR weeks.

Obviously I want my babies to "cook" as long as possible, but I'm so uncomfortable, so "done" with feeling so big and hurting. I have to say that unlike so many other twin stories, I haven't had any complications. I'm not on bedrest, but I've been trying to stay off my feet. Maybe I should be doing what I want/think I can do, and get these babies moving. After my appointment, my mother and I went shopping. I didn't even care that I had a few Braxton Hicks walking around the store. Why should be sitting home all the time waiting if it isn't going to happen!!!

Does anyone else feel this way??? What are the chances I will go earlier?

And what about trying a vaginal? My doc doesn't seem concerned about cord issues, or flipping... and even though baby B is bigger and has a minor heart defect, she is also not concerned about that with a vaginal. Any opinions on that???

So many questions, concerns, but any input will be appreciated. Thanks in advance!!!

 

It is hard being big and hurting in those last weeks :hug: I remeber it all too well!

My little girls were born on December 28th so I think that is a great day to deliver!!! I had a scheduled c-section at 37.5 weeks and was able to be home on New Years Eve day so that we could spend New Years Day at home with our little ones :wub: (they had no NICU time luckily)

I know it is easier said than done, but try to hang in there & let the process come as it will. The babies will be ready when they are ready & if not then your Dr's will do what is best for all 3 of you.

I can totally imagine how difficult it will be to be away from your Daughter on Christmas, but the joy of having a healthy momma & healthy babies will totally worth it in the end :hug: :hug:

In the meantime if you are feeling good, keep on doing all the things you are doing and enjoying your time!!

Sounds like you have done GREAT so far & congrats on making it this far!!!!

Good luck momma!!

 

I had to deliver early via an emergency C section so I don't have any experience for you about natural delivery except that my OB said that they wouldn't delivery Vaginally if Baby B was bigger than A. I don't know if this is the norm but it was the only thing I was told. Best of luck

 

I'm in the same boat so maybe I can offer a different mindset.

My first DS was born at 35 weeks due to HELLP. On the day he was born, the ultrasound estimated him to be 7lbs. He was born instead at 5lbs, 4oz and spent three weeks in the NICU to learn to eat and breathe. So while those u/s estimates you have sound like good weights - they are small, and not always accurate.

As far as the visitation policy and your DD. Can you plan to do Christmas on another day when you get home if that happens? That is what I'm doing. My DS is 4yo and I won't be seeing him for four days either. But I've learned to accept it and not let it stress me out. Just think of the reunion you will have when you go home and introduce her to her new siblings

My peri team won't schedule ANYTHING for me at all. Having a date would make me so very happy right now - just for a target - and I can't even get that. But it sounds like your body may make up its own mind for you and I wouldn't assume that you'll make it that far. I don't know how the FFN test works though.

I know you're frustrated but just go with the flow - these things are trivial. You will be ok. Your DD will be ok. You don't want to have your babies in the NICU on Christmas morning either, trust me....

Hang in there, you're doing great!

 

I was lucky enough to make it to 37 weeks with my twins, after 9 weeks of strict bedrest, and ended up delivering because of Pre-E. My scheduled date was for 38 weeks.

While I understand that you are uncomfortable, you do not want to 'get things moving' at this point. You are 35 weeks. My Hannah was a 35 weeker due to PROM, and had to spend 10 days in the hospital. It's heartbreaking to see your baby struggle to breathe, and I would have gladly taken another few weeks of being uncomfortable over that. I would rest more now than ever, if I were you. The BHs are telling you that you need to slow down, rest, and hydrate.

The FFN seems to be a good indicator, but I wouldn't trust it fully for sure, and I have not heard of the results being accurate for a month. I was always told 2 weeks.

Also, the U/S weights are just estimates. Jake was over a pound smaller than what the U/S predicted, and my last scan was 2 weeks prior to delivery if I recall correctly.

If given a choice(which I know we are usually not), I would rather deliver my babies on Christmas, and celebrate when we all came home, than to have my babies early and possibly go home without them. Hang in there, I know those last few weeks are tough. :hug:

 

UGH.... I understand. Seriously. My twins didn't want to come out. BUT my doc wouldn't let me go past 38 weeks, which he considered full term, so I delivered vaginally after being induced at 38 weeks and 2 days! NO NICU! It was awesome. My babes are 4 months now! My daughter, who is turning three, was preterm due to PROM, at 35 weeks, and spent 12 days in the NICU. So not fun, so heartbreaking, and really emotionally stressful. So, I understand your pain, trust me I do, but you do not want your babies coming before they are ready. Hang in there, you are so close!!!!!

 

Thanks for all the replies.

I WISH my doc would schedule me for 38 weeks... It's the 39-week point that I don't like because I've read so many conflicting thing about going past 38 weeks, like placentas getting old with twins, etc. And I'm upset because at one point she talked about moving my date to Dec. 21 (38 weeks) and now she won't even entertain the idea. I think if I had that date in mind it would be much easier to accept a goal -- instead of 39 weeks! I seriously think my insides would explode at that point. And then there's the issue that I'm not having any more scheduled ultrasounds, so I don't know what will happen to them as far as growth, I haven't gained any weight in a month, I can barely eat what I ate when I wasn't pregnant, and my heart rate is up.

I can't "fool" my daughter into thinking Christmas isn't Dec. 25 -- she's 7!! Yes, it's stupid and ridiculous to be so upset about missing the holiday, but I swear if there wasn't a flu ban on kids at the hospital, it wouldn't be so bad for me because we could have a mini celebration in the hospital and that would be fun and exciting and she could meet her new siblings. It's the thought of just missing my daughter so terribly on Dec. 24-25 and missing her joy on Christmas morning and experiencing that sets me off.

If these were my first children I would be OK with it. I won't miss the gatherings, etc. And all the "let the babies cook, let nature take its course" chatter from everyone who is NOT going through it doesn't help me right now. OF COURSE I WANT WHAT'S BEST FOR MY CHILDREN? But do I want a pity party? Yes! I want a little sympathy -- I want people to tell me I'm NOT crazy for feeling down about it. And despite my mood, I am trying to make the best of holiday season for my daughter right now and enjoy what I can.

And then I'm just so uncomfortable existing right now that I can't imagine what the next few weeks might bring. But I decided yesterday I'm not just going to lie around -- I wasn't put on bedrest, so if I feel like doing something, I'm doing it. Today I'm decorating the tree with my daughter while my husband works and watching Christmas movies. If I want to make cookies, I'm making cookies. I'm shopping if I feel like it. I was starting to just sit on the couch constantly and I can't do that knowing I might have weeks more to go. I'm 36 weeks on Tuesday and the 36-37 week mark and at least 5 lb. babies each was my mental goal for this pregnancy all along. I'm reaching that, so in my mind, it's the end...

 

I'm sorry your having a rough time right now. I made it to 36 weeks and ended up with pre-e and an unplanned c-section. I remember feeling so horrible in the end. I swore my insides would burst. I couldn't eat, I was constipated and I couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep. Everything was difficult. Mine were kind of average size, 5 and 5.5 pounds. My peri was clear that I would not go past 38 weeks. He believed the benefits were not worth the risks after 38 weeks. I'm sorry your MD won't budge on the delivery date. I would be frustrated too.
I'm so glad you are up and doing Christmas planning with your family. I think that's a GREAT idea. It will keep you busy and I'm sure your daughter will absolutely love it. Hang in there.

 

I think we all get your misery - honestly we do. A lot of us are right there with you. But again, I can't help but say 5 lbs of baby does not equal a healthy baby, and that's not a realistic goal for babies that won't need the NICU. You should take it easy, but do the things you feel you can do. But don't overdo things in hopes it's going to move you further along. You honestly don't know the size of those babies...

Hang in there, it will all be ok.

 

I do have to agree- the u/s do tend to be exaggerated in my opinion.

It so sucks at the end- & I did have some of the feelings of I want you OUT, but it's better for you to stay in. Guilt for thinking it, conflicting emotions about it. However- I would encourage you- :youcandoit: :youcandoit: :youcandoit: . You can make it to 37 weeks. I understand your concern about the 39 weeks, especially with the placenta and not getting confirmation that the placenta is not deteriorating. THAT IS VALID. I would ask your doc to compromise- at 37 weeks you should be able to get a growth scan or u/s to check on you every couple of days. I'm thinking that maybe your doc is going on vacation? (Terrible to say, but it does happen).

I know each day feels like a death sentence at the end & you are so uncomfortable & agree- you haven't been put on bedrest, so you don't need to rest all the time. Just take it easy & don't overextend yourself in an attempt to rush them out. Again,
:youcandoit: :youcandoit: :youcandoit: !

 

I agree with the others. My induction was scheduled at 38w2d, and they were as big as the u/s showed us (which is not always the case). Mine measured lower 6lbs range at 34 weeks, as a comparison (almost 8lbs at birth). I had a very easy pregnancy, smooth sailing, the last 3 weeks were hard, and my doctor didn't schedule anything until 36-37 weeks. I just went day by day, and not week by week or looking even further ahead. You can drive yourself crazy by planning, hoping, scheduling but it's out of your hands. I am not saying it's easy, and of course you have every right to complain once in a while, but in the end, every day you're able keep them in, is worth it, especially at this stage (assuming the babies and you're doing fine). I would just keep talking to your doctor and bring the issue up in about a week or so and see whether there is a possibility for 38 weeks-something at the latest (my hospital wouldn't schedule before 38 weeks unless there are medical reasons).

Hang in there!!!

 

My doctor said no more than 2lbs more than A. Mine measured almost exactly the same and were born almost the same. My oldest was 9lbs2oz, so she paved the way. Pushing 2 almost 8lbs babies out was a breeze, although I have to admit that my son was mostly pulled by his legs (breech) ... just one big push (my girl took only 4 pushes to get out).

 

Just to chime in, you're doing a great job growing those babes!

:youcandoit:

The expectation at the end is really hard, as is getting through every day, especially with the holidays. But every day you keep those babes growing is better for them. Even to 39 weeks. My girls were born at 39 weeks on the dot after an induction, and they were a fair bit smaller than the u/s estimated - 5.12 and 6.11. Although I'm very grateful to have gone that long and had babes as big as I did, in the scope of things 5.12 is pretty small. She had less iron stores than her bigger sister. I think they both could have used a little more time, and I'm glad they didn't come any earlier. Those first weeks are tough, and made easier by every extra day your twins get to "cook."

Your doctor has your best interests and the interests of those babes at heart. My pediatrician wished me to go to 40 weeks! He knew that's what some babes need. I have my doubts about the study saying twins need to be born by 38 weeks. There are studies that say otherwise.

Good job on getting so far, and hope birth comes soon, and at a good time for everyone.

FYI - I had a natural birth with my twins and it was wonderful - easy recovery. If it's the path you choose, it can be great!

 

My doctor won't let twin pregnancies go past 38 weeks. From past experience, I think that one of the hardest things about delivery is when it doesn't happen according to your expectations. I totally understand how upset you are - been there. Hope you can convince your doctor to deliver at 38 weeks.

 

Sorry its going rough- I would be sad about the holiday thing as well. I remember first reading your post and thinking 'she must be 35wks' cause 35wks was by far the WORST week for me. I think I cried everyday for whatever reason 36 and the couple of days of 37wks were much easier - when I went into my 37wk appt - I was thinking I could totally do this for another week or 2. Anyway what I mean its tough and you are doing the best you can - I understand the frustration with the doc - its hard not to keep focused when you don't have a 'goal date'. Perhaps after 38wks you could try home methods for inducing labor.
Good luck and hang in there!!!