Could this be why they are waking sooooo often at night?!?!!?

As you may notice, I post a TON about sleep. Sorry. However, my sister mentioned today that my night nursing approach could be the culprit as to why they wake so much. Let me know what you think... When one wakes, my husband and sometimes I, go get the baby from their room and bring them to our room. I nurse that baby in bed and my husband almost always takes the baby changes his/her diaper then brings him/her back to their crib. When he doesn't change their diaper, they almost always wake an hour later, which is why he changes them. My sister said that it seems like too much stuff is going on. My sister would take the baby, nurse, and place him/her back in their crib- all of this would take place right in their room.

The reason(s) I have my dh so involved is 1) help me out 2) weissbluth says that the husband is the secret weapon to a nursing mother

I don't know, maybe we're trying way too many things. Nothing seems to work. Last night, our ds woke 5 times and dd 4, but only needed to get up 8 times total as their wake schedule coincided at 300am! AHHHH! TIA!

 

Unless our little ones are poopy I never changed their diapers when they woke at night. I layer on the diaper rash cream and they were good until morning. I swear I read somewhere it wakes them up too much - which makes sense since you use that tactic to wake a sleepy baby to nurse.
I nurse mine in our bed as well, but luckily they've been sleeping through the night once they're in their crib.
Has your DH tried getting them back to sleep without you nursing them? Maybe they'd take a paci or could be rocked to sleep?

 

Too much activity could be part of the issue. Have they slept through the night at all yet? Are they sharing a crib? Our boys just started sleeping through the night in the past week since we separated them (hope this lasts!!).

Also,our pedi suggested to us that at their age and weights (13#1oz, 12#9.5oz), they should be sleeping through the night and if they fuss at night to let them cry for up to 30 min to see if they fall back to sleep. Its been working really well for us and to be honest, they don't seem to wake up at all in the night, at least I don't hear them. (BTW, I'm BF exclusively and feed about every 3 hours during the day.)

Not sure if this helps, but your post struck me just because we had been dealing with sleep through the night issues as well! Good luck!

 

It could very well be that your babies are not READY to sleep through the night. Maybe they still need to eat at night? I know mine are about your age, we don't do diapers at night unless they are poo. I wake up 3 - 4 times a night, I tandem nurse them and lay them down as soon as they stop suckling. Sometimes, I am too fast and they need to finish other times they go right to sleep. We do as little as possible not to fully wake them, so maybe your sister is right?

IMHO, I think people in general are forcing babies to develop on a schedule. Try following the babies lead and then you'll find out what they need to sleep through without crying or being hungry.

Here is a link I found on Kelly Mom. I know that this is not what you want to hear but just know that all babies will sleep through when they are ready.

 

I agree with your sister. Mine nurse, and right back asleep, no stimulation, ( lights, talk, no burping unless arching back, ect.) at all. We change their diaper before bed and first thing in AM, unless their smelly. Maybe they need help for falling back asleep on their own. Is ther anyway you could have the babies closer to you ? ( PNP or crib in your room, so much easier if their waking so often. )


As for the book HSHHC, take the info you find useful that you wanna use. I have the book and don't follow every little bit, because I just have to do what works for us. I know the book relies alot on CIO to help them learn to self sooth ang get good sleep habbits. Mine I don't think are old enough yet.

It's great that your DH is such a help. Maybe he could help with bedtime baths or getting ready for the next day, cleaning ? At night I'm on my own unless I need it. My babies nurse and go right back to bed so DH pretty useless for night time Good luck I hope you start getting some more sleep.


Jessica

 

quote:
Maybe they need help for falling back asleep on their own. Is ther anyway you could have the babies closer to you ? ( PNP or crib in your room, so much easier if their waking so often. )


Ditto... it does sound like you have a lot going on... you don't turn on any lights do you? (You should always keep it dim).

 

I definitly think you should stop changing their diapers when they wake at night unless they are poopy!!! Is there anyway to nurse them in the nursery and put them right back down?

Kristi
Molly and Zach
9 1/2 months

 

quote:
Originally posted by Erykah:
IMHO, I think people in general are forcing babies to develop on a schedule. Try following the babies lead and then you'll find out what they need to sleep through without crying or being hungry.

I know that this is not what you want to hear but just know that all babies will sleep through when they are ready.


I agree that babies sleep when they are ready. Thankfully, they transition from nursing to sleep relatively easily, they just wake so frequently- they even have bags under their eyes in the morning sometimes. Do you wake the other when the first one wakes? I tandem feed them when they are up at the same time, it just doesn't happen very often.

My dh has tried many times to soothe them, but they just usually cry in his arms until they nurse back to sleep. Thanks all for such prompt responses, it really helps!

 

quote:
Originally posted by excitedk:
I definitly think you should stop changing their diapers when they wake at night unless they are poopy!!! Is there anyway to nurse them in the nursery and put them right back down?



We are going to stop after reading all these posts. I will also try to nurse them tonight without dh having to put them down. Maybe this will help.

It's not like our babies are that little. At our 5 month visit, dd was 15lbs10oz and ds was 15lbs6oz.

 

quote:
Do you wake the other when the first one wakes?


yes!! I mean you could do it how you are doing now, if that is good for you but once I found out that it is ok to wake the other and feed them when the other wakes, I started to get better stretches of sleep. When I was feeding on demand (for nighttime) I was getting like only 3 hours of sleep a night. But once I started feeding them together or back to back I started to get 2 3 hour stretches of sleep (6 hours a night) and I actually started to feel a little more human again. I was unable to bf but to be honest with you, my girls didn't start sleeping through the night until about 9 months and even still they will often wake up (teething, gas, or maybe a bad dream). It doesn't matter if their formula fed or if they start solids early (one of my dds started solids at 4 months because she was consuming ALOT of formula so ped said go ahead) but it made no difference in her sleep patterns. Every baby is different and as Erykah said they will do it when they are ready. Just enjoy the tender moments you have with them at night cause in wink of an eye they will start to sleep through and you will actually miss those sweet cuddly moments

 

When one DD wakes I wake the other and then change both diapers... followed by tandum nursing to put them back to sleep... Mine are also up alot though (but we are just at 3 wks old) and they are poopy at pretty much every change.

 

Mine didnt sleep through untill they were 9.5 months old but from about 3 months if they would wake in the middle of the night i would keep the light off, not change their nappy and make things as quiet as possible. Mine used to wake up at least 6 times a night between them, it was a nightmare. I guess they just wernt ready to sleep through though i have to say they stopped getting night feeds around 4 months so i didnt understand this! I think they had a ploy to drive mummy insane lol. Hope you can figure things out x

 

I wouldn't change their diaper unless there is an incident where you absolutely have to. I wouldn't turn on any lights either. Like your sis said nurse and lay them back down.

 

Hi,

my sons are not yet sleeping through the night. i did get my 1 son down to 1 waking a night (at 5.5 months old) by having his daddy go in and offer a bottle of water to him. After 2 nights, Cole decided that it wasn't worth getting up to get water so he started sleeping through until 4a. Soon after that, he got a cold and went back to 3 wakings a night and now we're back down to 2. I haven't yet had my husband do the bottle of water trick, cause he manages my other son and he's a worse sleeper than Cole.

Now that they are well, I'll likely try this again. At 5.5 months they definitely don't need the sustenance, but they may need the emotional recharge -- so if you don't like CIO -- then you may be faced with getting up with the babies until they are ready to sleep through.

Good luck

 

Well, we stopped changing their diapers every time they wake up with the exception of a VERY wet diaper and obviously poopy. Our ds who was the more difficult one at night is waking up 1-2 fewer times per night. The last three nights he woke up 4 times which was alright. I still have my husband go in to try to soothe them, which almost never works. He still ends up bringing the one to our bed for me to nurse. We would like to try to give them water at least one time per night instead of nurse. I will let you know how that works. Thank you all for your words of wisdom and support.

 

I'm glad that it worked. Keeping movement to a minimum is key. I know that with my two, dh can never settle them if they are truly hungry.