Concerned, this is really affecting him!

So, I had posted a few weeks ago that my 2 year old suddenly was acting as if he saw a ghost in our staircase area in our home which can be seen from our family room where we spend all our time. He seemed to be slightly better for a few days...meaning, he wasn't hiding and flipping out but he was tolerating it but still kept looking up at the area and watching it but the light in the hall has to be on at all times. So, again, in the last couple of days he has been acting TERRIFIED of the staircase, will NOT walk up the stairs anymore, will completely avaoid walking by the area and pretty much will only sit on the couch and hide under a pillow. He constantly looks up at the area as if he is checking on it....on whatever it is he 'sees'. He's also now afraid of our dining room. I am CLUELESS as to what in the world has happened. I can't think of anything that has triggered this fear. He is always with me, he never watches anything on TV that is scary. The only thing they really watch is Barney, Elmo and Caillou. He really can't communicate that well so he can't tell me what's going on but he seems terrified. I feel SO bad for him and I am at a loss as to what to do. I have tried comforting him by telling him he is safe and there is nothing there, I have taken him to the area and tried to explain what shadows are...I've told him there is nothing there to be scared of, etc, etc, etc. It's really stressing me out and I feel like he's being emotionally distressed over whatever it is he thinks is there!

Can anyone please help me? I know it's most likely a phase but this cannont be healthy for him to be emotionally distressed in his own home and terrified constantly.

 

Can he verbalize to you why he is scared? Or maybe you can have him draw a picture of what he sees or at least use colors to describe it...maybe at least you might get an idea of why he is scared. I don't know what to say except hang in there. I can not imagine the distress you must feel..it would break my heart. You know, I have noticed that even commercials with scary scenes are being advertised on TV during times that my kids are still awake. I try to turn it when they come on, but if I'm not watching too carefully these commercials will be on and my girls staring at them before I can get to the remote to turn it off. I wonder if he might have seen something related to a horror movie on a commercial? I would also take stock of the magazines and things you have in your house and see if maybe he saw something scary in those. There's got to be an explanation that maybe you haven't found yet. If it keeps happening, a call to the pedi might be the best course of action to see what needs to be done. I know kids go through scary periods, but this sounds more than a phase, he sounds really scared and I really don't know what else to suggest but to call your pedi for advice.

 

This may sound silly, but have you tried using "scary spray"? My daughter Piper gets these odd irrational fears (that coyotes will come in her house, that dinosaurs or alligators are coming, etc.). I tried comforting her, telling her that her fears weren't possible, everything that seemed rational and loving. Her fears kept on coming until I took the advice of someone else on TS who suggested getting a spray bottle of water and spraying all of the doors of our house so that none of the scary animals could come in.

If your son can communicate enough to tell you if he's scared of ghosts or shadows or bad things, make a spray for whatever it is and spray the heck out of your house (with him helping, of course). Explain that the spray prevents whatever it is from coming into the house, or sitting on the stairs, whatever you think he needs.

Piper still gets scared every once in a while -- usually when she sees movement out of the corner of her eye, I think -- but pulling the spray out or reminding her that we've sprayed for alligators already usually does the trick. I hope it works for you too.

 

I really like Tricia's idea! :good: I may actually use it. :hug: I know this must be heart breaking for you! I know Mattie was scared to death of a little boy with a scream mask on at Halloween. Well a week later, she was dragging out the old newspapers and she was looking at a Wal-Mart ad that had the same scary mask advertised. She made us throw all of the papers away immediately. Maybe he has seen things even in the Wal-mart ads.

 

Brandy, we had this same exact problem! Piper was totally freaked out out by a kid in a Scream mask, and a father/son combo dressed up as commandos, complete with face masks and goggles. I also made the stupid mistake of taking my girls to Party City to look for Halloween costumes. There were ghouls hanging down from the ceiling and scary skeleton figures all over the place. Boy did I feel bad. Piper still tells me every time we drive past Party City that she doesn't like that scary store.

 

My sons have been very fearful lately - they talk constantly about monsters and are terrified of many of the pictures on the wall.

I have also noticed that Caillou, although cute, often introduces my boys to new issues and worries that they didn't have before... so, I've banned it for the time being. I don't know if maybe that show is the source of the fear, but it's worth thinking about whether the show might have introduced the concept.

Also, my boys are big on being carried up the stairs... I am not saying that your son is not legitimately fearful... but there may be an element of manipulation (not malicious... just for security and to get something he enjoys) involved in the situation. Is that possible?

I know I'm expressing this poorly, but I just wanted to throw some ideas out for you - I hope you can figure something out to make him feel better. I'd be distressed, too, if my son were so extremely fearful! :hug:

 

Do you ever take him to other peoples houses?? How does he act in the same situation, but in a different place? My 3 year olds are scared to death of going upstairs by themselves. I figure it is a phase, and I totally get what you mean about making this as easy of a phase as possible on him!