I have been on this site several times asking about CIO. I want to start sleep training, but I just can't seem to do it. We tried a little sleep training for naps and both the babies and I ended up hysterical, so I gave up. Also, my DH can take my DS crying, but not my DD, and I caught him sneaking her out of the nursery because she was crying! But now I'm so tired! The babies are sleeping worse than ever and are getting up earlier and earlier to come sleep with me. Even my DD who use to sleep 10 hours on her own is now getting up to come sleep with me!! I feel like I have ruined her sleep!! Both LO's are soother babies and I worry about doing CIO because they are still too young to put the soother in their mouths by themselves. I also can't decide if I should do extinction or Feber... I heave read the sticker about CIO success stories, and I think the babies and I will be happier once we do CIO. I was wondering when people who have done CIO knew it was time to start sleep training??
It's hard to decide when and if your LO's are ready for CIO. :hug: For me, personally, I couldn't do it when they were too young. Mainly because they were still waking up to eat full bottles at night and I wouldn't have known when they were getting up to eat or if it was just habit. Once they started to only eat a few ozs and it seemed like it was all habit, I did CIO but that wasn't until 8/9 months. It only took a few nights at that time. :good: That's another thing you can base it on, if the first night is beyond horrible for all and they don't seem to be letting up, it may be too early. I hope they start sleeping for you soon. :hug: Have you tried giving your dd tylenol? You said she was sleeping great and now not so much, maybe she's teething?
Part of the reason that I think we should be doing CIO is that neither baby eats in the night now. Also, as soon as I take them to bed they roll over and go to sleep...no fussing!
I think you probably have a gut feeling on whether they are ready. My DD was a great self-soother from early on, and at 5 months would have been fine with CIO (although she was a good sleeper at that point). My DS lacked any apparent self-soothing ability at that age (also a paci baby). We did CIO at 7 months, which was when I felt he was ready and worked great. Will they sleep in a swing or bouncy? That's how we bridged the gap. I'd put DS to bed at night and when he woke, he'd go into the swing and sleep peacefully the rest of the night. We did that until he was ready for CIO, and it worked great for us.
We waited to CIO because they were preemies and still needed to eat at night. We waited until we started solids and found it wasn't helping them sleep any better and their night bottles were not getting drunk as much. I also waited until my DH was out of town for a bit so I was the only one doing it. It was easier to keep things consistent. DH also caved a lot earlier than I did. Even at 7 months they couldn't put in their own paci's but I just put a lot in their crib and they figured it out eventually. CIO took us about 3 nights of 1hr+ crying and about a full week for STTN. Then came teeth, crawling and more teeth and we had about 3 nights a week of STTN. I hope you get results sooner than later, but go into it knowing it will tough on you all.
It's great that they roll over & go to sleep on their own! So when do you need CIO? Naps? I think my two were just a little older than yours when we did it. It really was just a feeling I had that they were ready. It is painful for Mommy & Daddy! Listening to your baby cry is never fun. For me, I just reminded myself over & over that they were fine, their diapers were dry, they weren't hungry, I was teaching them a valuable skill. It doesn't make it tons easier, but it got me through it. And really, only the first couple of days were bad, they really do learn so fast! The thing is, both Mom & Dad have to be on board. Because without consistency, they will just get mixed messages & won't learn and you will be torturing yourselves for nothing! :hug:
We had great sleepers for naps and going to bed...but STAYING in bed was our problem. I think with my DS he was 6.5 months old and we just did it one nite...it was TERRIBLE! I went in every 10 minutes and at 3 hours later everyone was alseep. IT WAS TERRIBLE. However the next night it was only 2 hours...and I still went in ever 10 minutes to pat back, give binkie, sing all that stuff...I never picked him up however....we snuggled with me leaning over the crib. It honestly gets better I would say it took us a week or so....but I have found that watching the clock helps me LOTS. I know that what seems like FOREVER has only been 2 minutes. I think each person is on there own to decide when " they " have had "enough" .....with my DD it was more like 12.5 months before we had no night bottles and she cio....I couldnt go in and comfort her b/c I knew it would only make it 10x worse! So I just watched the clock....45 minutes later she settled in. Let me tell you ...she was MAD! But they do learn quick....and its way way way worse on parents.... I think CIO is one of the hardest things...you just have to be on the same page as your dh....and hang in there...watch the clock and set a limit for what you can handle...maybe your family isnt ready yet...that is what I have learned MOST about being a parent...each family is different and that is okay. how is that for a ramble post!! I hope that you got something from it...and I hope that you dont feel alone....CIO is hard.
I'm told ferber recommends 4-6mths , ideally 6mths old. We did extinction @ 5.5mth, i knew it was time because they just weren't getting any consolidated sleep AT ALL (addicted to being rocked) the sootheing that used to work stopped working and more importantly i knew that they were capable of sootheing themselves. Only you know your babies and you have to decide if you think they are capable or not. If you think the time is now then please get DH on side and follow it through, they really do learn fast if your consistant. Wishing you lots of luck for when you start.
