CIO and Naps

Hi there,

We're about to start sleep training (tonight!) using CIO (cry it out). While the nighttime process seems straightforward, I'm very confused about what to do about naps. Ferber says to let them cry for 30 minutes and then if they are still not asleep to take them out of their cribs - but I know our babies will just keep crying hysterically because they are so tired - so then what do we do?? He doesn't really say.

My husband thinks we should just let them cry until they fall asleep, even at naptime, but I think this is too much. My thought was to get them out of their cribs after 30 min of crying and play with/hold them (but not rocking or pacifying) for 20 minutes and then try them again in their cribs, continuing until they finally nap. My husband disagrees because if they need to nap they don't need to be played with.

ideas?

They are 5 months old (4 months adjusted) and we have the green light from the doctor.


Thank you all. I did search the archives but it was hard to find the answer to this slant on the CIO question.

-debby

Nomi and Ruti 5 Months
Dina 4 years

 

We did CIO with Emma and at night first. Once we established a good nighttime routine and she was sleeping through, we focused on the naps.

We used the HSHHC method. We put the girls down at 9, 1, and 3. It was SO hard to listen to her cry, but we kept her in there for an hour. In the beginning she would spend a good 10-20 minutes crying then settle for a few, cry again, etc. There were a few days while trying to sleep train her that I gave up and went in to get her. You just need to do what feels right. More often than not, I held strong and left her in there. I think it took us about a month to establish a good nap routine.

 

What I did for naps was leave them in the room for 90 minutes. BUT, I stayed too if one or both were crying. Their cribs were in our bedroom so I'd shh and pat a bit then sit on the edge of my bed not looking at them or moving at all. After a little while if they were crying hard I'd shhh and pat briefly again and do the same thing. I did that over and over until they fell asleep. If they fell asleep early on and woke up before the 90 min, I'd go back in and start all over. Within just a few days they were falling asleep within ten minutes and mostly sleeping the whole time. For another week or so one or the other would wake at that infamous 45 min mark between sleep cycles so I'd go do the pat and shhh thing again. After that, naps were smooth sailing. It's a pain while you're doing it, but it's well worth it in the end.

 

Mine are 8 mos, 7 adjusted, and I'm still going through THIS for naps. There is 1/3 of them that I get "just right" and they go to sleep without an issue.

The other 2 are HORRENDOUS. I don't know what I'm doing wrong but it's too late to find out now LOL.

I let them scream untili they fall asleep IF and only IF, I KNOW they are DEAD TIRED.. o therwise, I just cannot handle it. I've tried and unless I have earplugs in and am far away.. I just CANNOT hear it!!

They do their first AM nap, NO SWEAT.. and then the other 2 UGH.

My advice (or opinion, really), is to let them cry UNTIL they fall asleep IF you KNOW they are tired. I kind of tell myself this "They're TIRED... I can either let them cry IN THERE or bring them out here and let them cry out here.. and be 10x's more miserable later.." That seems to make me feel better

Good luck and it's TOUGH! (still.) We also use a vacuum noise cd for eVERY nap--- w/o that-- there would be NO naps.

 

I followed HSHHC. It was a god send. It says to put them down for an hour. If they cry the whole hour (which mine didn't) then to go in there, pick them up, soothe them, and if they still seem tired to try again briefly. Otherwise, to go and get the child and keep them up until the next naptime (so if 9am nap turned into 10am still up, you'd hold them off as close to 1pm as you can). Then try again. Mine don't need the 3pm nap. The nap between 3-5 pm is short 30-45mins and optional. Some days, they do take it, but most not. It is hard at first when you have to keep up a cranky baby, but it is so worth it. Mine were taking 1-2 hour naps at 9am and 1pm regularly and easily by the end of the first week. HSHHC says that nothing shorter than 1hr is restorative. This is why you leave the child in the crib/room for the whole hour. You want them to know that it's nap time and this is for how long is acceptable. They can lay quietly and play if they'd like, but it's time for them to regroup and regenerate.

Oh and I had MUCH happier babies when they were nap trained!! And mommy got some of her life back, could shower, eat, etc. A true blessing... Why didn't I do it sooner!?

 

just incase you didn't know HSHHC Healthy sleep habits happy child is the book. It is great and offers various options from CIO (quicker) to a more gentle option of periodic soothing (takes longer). I'd suggest putting them to bed at 7:30 - 8:00 pm whichever way... putting them in the crib CIO, or giving them a hold on the bed first to wind down. Wake up at 7 AM then naps at 9 AM and 1 PM and possible 3 PM. Try to get them before they start to be over tired and crying. I found they were harder to settle if they were over tired. At 6months I find I can look at the clock for their naps and night sleep. At 4 months I was still looking at them for signs. I also put a little wipe of lavender oil on their sheets and music on in their rooms. I try to do somethings the same time before their naps or bed. Before their naps I close the drapes and put them in their sleeping bags. You will find your own routine.

I give mine a dream bottle before I go to bed (often at 9 or 9:30) they take the bottle asleep and I leave their diaper.

heather

 

Thanks for the responses. they cried for 2 naps periods of 1 hour each and then heavily for 1.75 hours. Since then they have woken a little each for a minute or two. I'll feed them at 10 pm as usual and see what happens tonight. yikes!

-debby