How do you seasoned mothers of twins do it all? My twins are almost 8 mo old and I am stretched SO thin. Between housework and just taking care of babies, it's all I can do to keep afloat. It seems like all I do all day is clean and straighen up things, only to have 6:00 pm come around and the house is a wreck again/or just never clean to begin with. I tried making a schedule for myself (like bathrooms on Tues, floors on Wed, etc), but the last two weeks I was only able to do a couple of days according to my "schedule". And I'm just so tired ALL THE TIME. And they sleep through the night, so I'm getting 7-8 hours of sleep, but I can hardly keep my eyes open during the day. I know I should just accept that I can't do it all, but you know, once I start letting a few things go here and there - my house becomes/looks dirty and unkept (is that a word?) Advice? I guess I just needed to vent. My husband offered to help more, and while that's a nice gesture, I know that will go nowhere fast.
QUOTE(JenniferZ @ May 24 2008, 07:13 PM) [snapback]791565[/snapback] How do you seasoned mothers of twins do it all? My twins are almost 8 mo old and I am stretched SO thin. Between housework and just taking care of babies, it's all I can do to keep afloat. It seems like all I do all day is clean and straighen up things, only to have 6:00 pm come around and the house is a wreck again/or just never clean to begin with. I tried making a schedule for myself (like bathrooms on Tues, floors on Wed, etc), but the last two weeks I was only able to do a couple of days according to my "schedule". And I'm just so tired ALL THE TIME. And they sleep through the night, so I'm getting 7-8 hours of sleep, but I can hardly keep my eyes open during the day. I know I should just accept that I can't do it all, but you know, once I start letting a few things go here and there - my house becomes/looks dirty and unkept (is that a word?) Advice? I guess I just needed to vent. My husband offered to help more, and while that's a nice gesture, I know that will go nowhere fast. Vent away! I could have written this last night as dh and I got into an argument about the housework. I CAN'T do it all, even though it's my "job." I would rather spend time with my boys, and relax a bit when they nap(no set schedule), than do 5 loads a laundry a day! Plus, I might get the laundry IN the washing machine. But getting it in the dryer and out, folded, and put away-yeah-that takes weeks! I do try to keep the downstairs looking halfway decent. But I am tired. Who wouldn't be playing with 7 month old twins all day? What I can't stand is how dh job ends at 5...He comes home, watches TV, plays video games, lounges around, etc. Me? I have to do the laundry, dishes, etc.. All the stuff I couldn't do during the day because I was taking care of my boys. Oh well. So to answer your question. No-I can not do it all. Maybe when they are older... Ya right. Who am I kidding??
Honestly my house is still a mess after I've spent all day straightening up BUT it would look far far worse if I just let it go. Just imagine if you didn't do anything! :shok: I really do understand being tired and you do need to give yourself a break. The house doesn't need to be perfect, just clean. I like Flylady a lot and I find her advice and schedules to be really handy.
QUOTE(megkc03 @ May 24 2008, 07:26 PM) [snapback]791572[/snapback] Vent away! I could have written this last night as dh and I got into an argument about the housework. I CAN'T do it all, even though it's my "job." I would rather spend time with my boys, and relax a bit when they nap(no set schedule), than do 5 loads a laundry a day! Plus, I might get the laundry IN the washing machine. But getting it in the dryer and out, folded, and put away-yeah-that takes weeks! I do try to keep the downstairs looking halfway decent. But I am tired. Who wouldn't be playing with 7 month old twins all day? What I can't stand is how dh job ends at 5...He comes home, watches TV, plays video games, lounges around, etc. Me? I have to do the laundry, dishes, etc.. All the stuff I couldn't do during the day because I was taking care of my boys. Oh well. So to answer your question. No-I can not do it all. Maybe when they are older... Ya right. Who am I kidding?? I so could have written this over the past two days. I have been stressing over housework. Granted DH does help out, but his definition of clean is different then mine. I have even begged for a cleaning lady to at least come every two weeks or even once a month but DH has seemed to abandon his search. I know I can not do it all. Not only is there little time but my back can't even handle it!
QUOTE(JenniferZ @ May 24 2008, 06:13 PM) [snapback]791565[/snapback] How do you seasoned mothers of twins do it all? My twins are almost 8 mo old and I am stretched SO thin. Between housework and just taking care of babies, it's all I can do to keep afloat. It seems like all I do all day is clean and straighen up things, only to have 6:00 pm come around and the house is a wreck again/or just never clean to begin with. I tried making a schedule for myself (like bathrooms on Tues, floors on Wed, etc), but the last two weeks I was only able to do a couple of days according to my "schedule". And I'm just so tired ALL THE TIME. And they sleep through the night, so I'm getting 7-8 hours of sleep, but I can hardly keep my eyes open during the day. I know I should just accept that I can't do it all, but you know, once I start letting a few things go here and there - my house becomes/looks dirty and unkept (is that a word?) Advice? I guess I just needed to vent. My husband offered to help more, and while that's a nice gesture, I know that will go nowhere fast. Amen.
QUOTE(megkc03 @ May 24 2008, 06:26 PM) [snapback]791572[/snapback] Vent away! I could have written this last night as dh and I got into an argument about the housework. I CAN'T do it all, even though it's my "job." I would rather spend time with my boys, and relax a bit when they nap(no set schedule), than do 5 loads a laundry a day! Plus, I might get the laundry IN the washing machine. But getting it in the dryer and out, folded, and put away-yeah-that takes weeks! I do try to keep the downstairs looking halfway decent. But I am tired. Who wouldn't be playing with 7 month old twins all day? What I can't stand is how dh job ends at 5...He comes home, watches TV, plays video games, lounges around, etc. Me? I have to do the laundry, dishes, etc.. All the stuff I couldn't do during the day because I was taking care of my boys. Oh well. So to answer your question. No-I can not do it all. Maybe when they are older... Ya right. Who am I kidding?? Exactly how I feel. When he's off work he is really off work. I never get any time off.
so this is going somewhere that megkc03 may not have intended it to, but why does DH come home and sit?! Our jobs never end! I've thought about leaving for 8 hours just so he would know all the great and all the crappy things that go on during a day. Of course if I did this the house would be a disaster. I reached my breaking point yesterday after 12 hours in the house alone with young children.(he went to play frisbee golf after work) DH volunteered to do late feedings etc., but he couldn't figure out what they wanted and I ended up doing it all. This morning, though, he told the babes that they were lucky to have me because he couldn't do what I do. So nice to hear! So to answer original question, maybe you can do it all if you never want to sleep and be real cranky all the time. I'll have a neat house again in 10 years or so. . .
I struggled with this issue when I had my first baby... how am I supposed to find time to keep the house perfect while tending to my baby's needs? After stressing myself about it for a while, I realized that it's more important for me to be a 'mom' than a 'housewife' or 'homemaker.' My house can be spotless when my kids are grown up... but right now, I am more than happy to let housework slack a bit in order to enjoy the kids. I refuse to just stick them someplace - a swing or pack-n-play, or make them play by themselves, or pop in a movie for DD, just to clean. My kids are first and foremost, and, and long as my house is sanitary and tidy, I don't feel that it has to be spotless (because making it spotless means that I'd have to give up precious quality time with my kiddos!).
The short answer is: NO. you can't do it all. Some of it has got to slide. I had someone come and just do the floors and bathrooms for me 2x a month late pregnancy, and just kept her on after the twins were born. I know not everyone can afford this, but she comes every week now and it was SOOOO wonderful to know that the floors and bathrooms were cleaned regularly - especially once the girls were on the move. DH and I pretty much split the cooking too. You won't have enough time to do it all until they are a bit older. Hang in there! I often make dinner (for us) during their 11am nap!!!
Yup, I can do it all! I don't know why the rest of you can't! QUOTE(3greysandamutt @ May 24 2008, 11:52 PM) [snapback]791877[/snapback] I struggled with this issue when I had my first baby... how am I supposed to find time to keep the house perfect while tending to my baby's needs? After stressing myself about it for a while, I realized that it's more important for me to be a 'mom' than a 'housewife' or 'homemaker.' My house can be spotless when my kids are grown up... but right now, I am more than happy to let housework slack a bit in order to enjoy the kids. I refuse to just stick them someplace - a swing or pack-n-play, or make them play by themselves, or pop in a movie for DD, just to clean. My kids are first and foremost, and, and long as my house is sanitary and tidy, I don't feel that it has to be spotless (because making it spotless means that I'd have to give up precious quality time with my kiddos!). I agree 100%. When your kids look back on their childhoods, they will not remember the dirty dishes in the sink or the dust on the book shelves. They will remember the trips the park... the silly songs you made up together... the books you read, how you snuggled together, and the days where you all spent all day in your jammies. You'll have the rest of your life to clean, enjoy your kids, have fun, and get some baskets to throw stuff in! Take dh up on his offer. Actually write down things he can do. Even if it is only 5-10 min of something. My dh unloads the dishwasher everyday when he comes home. Sometimes they need direction!
I can do it all but it just not the way it used to be. Its just on a sliding scale now and will be until the kids go to school I imagine. There is only one of me and 3 of them. DH helps a ton but we have realized that a clean and organized house where everything is put away all the time is not only unattainable at the moment but boring too.
I agree that it is non-stop. I have had to become even more effcient. The one thing that I did that made things better was to just remove everything that wasn't required. It cuts down on things that you have to look at so then if there is a little mess it doesn't look really bad. Plus then you aren't dusting around things that are not needed. Any way the babies get into everything now that is within reach and I figure their reach grow daily so just box it all up and hope that someday I can see my stuff again. At least it looks less cluttered now. oh and I have become OCD about having things exactly as I have them. The only way I keep sane is to know that everything is where I will be looking for it and that in the AM when I get up I don't have hours of cleaning/picking up from the night before. DH doesn't get it but he is going to be home with them for 2 months while I work so he'll get it then! It is such a hard transition that people don't really talk about. I think because they want to "keep up appearances". Good luck finding your groove - you will!
Nope, I can't do it all. I keep the house in a relatively 'clean' state, but without my DH's help the deep cleaning would never get done. Typically on the weekends he will watch the babies while I clean then the next day I will watch the babies while he does yardwork. During the week I do the daily stuff/taking care of the babies but when he gets home from work I get a 30 minute break while he entertains them. Then after bed he helps fold laundry. And we have recently started a new thing where every Saturday I get to sleep in until 9 a.m. and every Sunday he gets to sleep until 9 a.m., I can't tell you how much I look forward to that one day of 'rest'!! I would enlist your DH it is a full time job and a half raising twins in the first year!!
During one nap 1 1/2-2 hour and for 1 hour after they are in bed (7-8) I clean. During the other nap I will often relax, sleep, read, watch tv, computer time... That way I feel like I have some me time and I can get a lot done in 3 or almost 3 hours with no babies around. I try to do laundry when I have a minute and will fold in with babies around. I dont' care if they pull out the clean clothes, I just have to put the folded ones up on the couch(pushed back). When I put it away they love to play in their room for a change of pace. We have a loft with all baby toys ect. I don't worry about picking up the toys every day. I do a couple of times a week to keep them organized. I also dont' ahve all the toys out. I have about 1/3 out. 1/3 put away and 1/3 down stairs in family room. These down stair I pick up at bedtime and sometimes at nap time. But I dont' worry so much about the loft as that isn't what company sees and not where DH & I watch TV so I don't have ot see the mes. Maybe you could have a room that is ok to let get cluttered adn not have to worry about. My DH isn't home in the evenings so I will often have the TV on and fold laundry/ do dishes/ straighten toys. Now this advice is not to say I have the cleanest house, I don't. But those are some tips that help keep it under control. The things that I try to get done the most are bathrooms once a week, floors every 2 days, kitchen sinks emptied every night, and laundry. The rest isn't my priority. Make your priorities and know that the rest is okay to wait if you don't have time.
