Can i just vent?!

I swear the crying never stops... Both my babies have colic.. I am going nuts.. and if the babies arent crying.. my 4 year old DD is!!!

I feel bad that the babies are crying but there is nothing i can do.. I try a bottle, then i try burping them, then i change the diaper, then i swaddle, then i sit them up and when none of that works i put them in the swing and when that doesnt work i just leave them.. I cant be holding a crying baby all the time right? i let them cry for 5 mins then pick them up and it starts all over again.. i go thru my list.. its never ending!!!

well thats it.. thats all i really have to complain about...


thanks

 

:hug99: I'm so sorry. It's so hard when they are both crying at once! I think it's the hardest things about having twins! I hope things get better soon.

 

QUOTE(2boysforus @ Oct 3 2007, 08:45 PM) [snapback]435132[/snapback]
:hug99: I'm so sorry. It's so hard when they are both crying at once! I think it's the hardest things about having twins! I hope things get better soon.


:hug99:
I can relate! I am so sorry! Is there anyone that can come over for an hour or so to give you a break? Sometimes you just have to get away form the crying.

 

I am so sorry. Topics like this make me so sad because those days were just so bad. I dont even have any advice but I just want you to know that so many others have gone through that. You are going through a hard stage right now. It sounds like you are trying everything. To to the top of this page and under first year handbook, you will find a section for 'surviving twinfants'. You may want to see if there are any suggestions there.

 

Using the swing helped me TONS at that stage. DS slept in his so well. I had the Aquarium one from Fisher Price. Maybe a good swing would work? Or two?

 

I swear 6 -8 weeks was the WORST for us. It seemed all they did was cry. I promise you're in the thick of it right now. Things really turned the corner at 8 weeks. Hang in there mama...it WILL get better. Promise.

Reyna

 

I too feel your pain. My girls cried for hours a day, weeks on end, and I honestly didn't know how I was going to survive. But I did. Nothing worked for me other than holding them as much as I could (which is impossible to do all the time) so I have no advice, just big fat :hug99: for you!!

 

We were introduced to The Happiest Baby on the Block at about 4 months, and boy do I wish I'd seen it earlier. I'd recommend getting the video/DVD (maybe you can get it through your library - interlibrary loan is a wonderful thing). Just a few quick steps to settling down a crying baby, and it worked really well for us. We did have trouble transitioning from having a nice quiet baby on our laps to being able to put them down without them starting up again, but it was still very helpful.

The DVD is less than an hour long, and you can see exactly what each step is. I read the book afterwards, and there was nothing else useful, and I think I'd have trouble figuring out exactly what he (Dr. Harvey Karp I think?) meant.

The quick rundown - it's the 5 Ss

Swaddle (and he means very snuggly)
Side (hold your baby on his/her side right in your lap)
Swing (movement - this was more of a very fast jiggling side to side than swinging)
Shushing (a very loud SHHHHHH - it has to be louder than the baby's crying. There is also a CD that goes with the book that has a sort of combo heart beat and white noise that works very well)
Suck (pacifier or whatever else you want to put in baby's mouth)

This would calm our screaming babies in a matter of seconds (sometimes anyways).

Best of luck! I'm so glad we are through those days, and I sympathize with you!

Rachel

 

:hug99: :hug99: Repeat: THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!!
(I have said that many times!!) I am so sorry you are going through that - It really does want to make you pull your hair out. Please vent anytime!! HANG IN THERE!!

 

You can totally vent as much as you want! :hug99: For mine 6-8 weeks was the hardest time, nothing worked except holding them and swings. If you have to let them cry and walk away for a few minutes, do it. That saved my sanity a few times. At that time I was feeding them EBM all the time because they were terrible nursers and I would burp them after every ounce of their bottle and that seemed to help. I would put a big body pillow or prop them up on boppies on the floor on blankets. In another couple weeks they really start looking at things so then they start liking mobiles and TV and pretty much anything you put in front of them. Hang in there I promise it isn't like this for long. If I could go back the one thing I would do differently is forget about the house work, they are like this for such a short period of time and I would stress so bad about not doing the dishes and dumb stuff like that. If I had known how short of a period of time my house was going to have to be a mess for I never would have worried about it.

 

Have you tried white noise? I mean really really LOUD white noise? When my kids would get like that - I'd set them in their swings our bouncies (neither of which did anything for them on their own), and I would turn on our super loud vacuum right next to them. It totally quieted them down. Sometimes we'd leave it run for 15 minutes, so we could have time to eat a meal or whatever.

I also used the hairdryer, the hood vent fan, static from the TV or radio or a box fan. They all did the trick, but the key was to get it loud enough!

Just something else to try when nothing else works!!
Good Luck, Suzi

 

I know this is a really hard time right now. You are probably beyond sleep deprived and just trying to get through the day hour by hour (sometimes minute by minute). My one dd went through this as well at the same age as yours and so I kept discussing it with my ped. My ped doesn't believe in the colic thing and when I kept insisting that something was wrong, she was finally diagnosed as having reflux. She was put on meds and WOW what a different baby I had. About a month later, her sister started the constant crying screaming thing so I had her checked out and sure enough, she had reflux too. I did some research recently for a freind who has newborn twins and found out about something called silent reflux which is basically reflux without the spitup and some of the other symptoms associalted with regular reflux. I kept telling my friend that maybe her babies had reflux because she felt that something was wrong with them and that they were in pain when they cried. It wasn't a I'm wet or hungry cry. It was a blood curdling scream/cry. Turns out that they both had reflux as well, went on meds, got the go ahead to put some cereal in their bottles and voila...happy and completely different babies. I'm not saying that your babies have this but use your instinct. If you think their crying is more than just a fussy, hold me, feed me, change me cry then call the ped and have them checked out.

There is almost nothing worse than 2 constantly crying babies, ESPECIALLy when you are completely exhausted. I hope things get better for you soon!!!

 

Vent away my frend! It is a complete nightmare and at times it even seems unbearable. Cry, complain, or even laugh...whatever it takes to get through it. My husband and I found laughing was the best.
The following are some of the things that work for me:
Truely, I would always imagine that there was a video camera above us and how funny it would look if people were watching two screaming infants scare the pants off of a grown adult. Its true though, sometimes those kids freak me out and then I realize that I am being scared by two infants, now four months old, who can't walk, talk, or even throw anything...what the heck am I going to do when they can actually move or yell at me!
Also, someone on this board suggested to remember that their crying is their only way to communicate. My DD has always HATED to sleep. She is only 4 months old right now and screams bloody murder every time we turn the corner to go up to her crib in their nursery for a nap; therefore, I have determined while she is yelling, she is actually saying "Mommy, I love you so much, you are the most fun amazing woman in the world and every minute I spend away from you is a terrible thing...yadayadayada..." KWIM.
I still call my mom crying a couple times a week, whether it is because they are not napping or not eating, it upsets me just the same. The main difference, is that they are not the screaming, colicky, refluxy babies that they were during the first three months.

That is what I remind myself of now when they are screaming about not wanting to go to sleep....at least they are finally screaming about something worth screaming about!

Amy

 

sending hugs your way. I know how hard that can be (only it was my singleton). I found wearing him in a sling helped alot, but I don't know if you can do that with two.
xoxoxo

I also found alot of his crying was frustration. He hated being a baby, once he was able to do things for himself... he was sooo much happier.

 

Just wanted to say sorry things are so rough right now. Vent away!!!!!!!! I too have an older DC and it does make things a bit more complicated. I dont have much knowledge about colic, but for the crying I wore one of my DS' in a sling alot and that worked some of the time.

Rachel

 

Vent away...this is the hardest period of time! It will get better but if you need to walk away for a few, then do it. I remember many a breakdown.

I finally had to invest in a mei tai and a sling carrier so I could put both babies on and walk with them without wearing my arms out...but, since they were about 3.5 months old...things are much improved!

 

QUOTE(SusieQ @ Oct 4 2007, 06:40 AM) [snapback]435276[/snapback]
Have you tried white noise? I mean really really LOUD white noise? When my kids would get like that - I'd set them in their swings our bouncies (neither of which did anything for them on their own), and I would turn on our super loud vacuum right next to them. It totally quieted them down. Sometimes we'd leave it run for 15 minutes, so we could have time to eat a meal or whatever.

I also used the hairdryer, the hood vent fan, static from the TV or radio or a box fan. They all did the trick, but the key was to get it loud enough!

Just something else to try when nothing else works!!
Good Luck, Suzi

I was going to suggest trying these things too. A vacuum, bathroom fan, LOUD radio static or sometimes the dryer will work. If you have earplugs don't feel shy about putting them in, seriously. I'm sensitive to loud noises and a baby crying in my ear was sheer misery.

I just want to say that this phase will end, generally around 2-3 months of age. It usually stops just as suddenly as it comes, one day you'll notice that there was very little crying.

Just hang in there and vent away.

 

Oh, I hope you have a chance to come back and read some of this support. I really recommend The Happiest Baby on the Block DVD (you don't have time to read the book!). Also I used to wear my fussiest baby in a Moby Wrap (www.mobywrap.com) and that really helped. Poor you! The crying does stop...but it takes time. We were cruising as of 10.5 weeks - I know that might seem a long way away. In the mean time call anyone and everyone to come and do some baby holding. Don't worry about starting bad habits. My Evan slept almost exclusively in the stroller, people's arms and the swing for two months and now he happily sleeps in his crib.

 

the swings were the only thing that helped us establish sleep at night - found out later on that the colic was colic and also formula intolerance...it got better after we switched to soy....

I remember one day putting my son in his swing and turning the vacuum cleaner on next to him and I seriously let it run for nearly an hour - DH and I were YELLING at each other to talk but it was so much better than listening to him cry!

 

I agree with the other posts who suggested the "Happiest Baby on the Block" DVD. It was a lifesaver for us! We followed his advice to a "T" and it helped tremendously. We thought my DS had colic, but he was fine once we started this. We, too, had the Fisher Price aquarium swings which they slept in for the first few months. My kids were like Houdini though, and started wiggling out of the swaddle at a very early age, so we ordered two Miracle Blankets online. Hang in there. It will get better!

 

Both my guys were criers from day 1. I breastfed for 3 months and switched to formula. When they went on formula, they went from fussy to SUPER fussy. The younger one was also on meds due to silent reflux. I was at my wits end and finally switched to soy formula and whola!!! they were happy babies! I even took the younger one off his meds and he's been doing fine since. I honestly do believe that if we wouldn't have switched to soy, we would still be dealing with the same cranky babies we had for the first 3 months. I hope you find your answer because I know how stressful it can be!